Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML
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Wow O_o I can't believe how much of a response this thing is getting(first post ever...) But for clarification:(Skip if you want...Blah) a) Since my mother was willing to beat me with a metal end of a broom for claiming Hitler and the events of the holocaust were wrong and has a machete at the ready underneath her bed, the threat was/is to be taken seriously, wouldn't you think... (Is she still hilarious?) b) Kill me, sure, but THE KID??? c)I would've loved for my mother to have been concerned/open enough with me to have an actual conversation about sex... Blegh -_-
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
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Top comments
Juli_fml 0
anyone else think there should be a "parents" section on here?
JohnnyViola 0
Oh, wow. That sounds like my mother.
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Comments (293)
G_Bug 0
lol your mother, what a joker that one
therearesecrets 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAAAHAHAAA. I LOVE THAT.
Nyxity 0
that made me rofl so hard. sounds exactly like what my mom would say (and my boyfriend's, for that matter), but more terrifying xD
jemmehlee 1
thats..... scary
im4evaonyomind 0
is that not the normal "the talk" that everyone gets? lol
jailbot 7
Lolololol Yeah, I can totally imagine saying something like this to my kids... except it would be BEFORE my child ever had any sex, and would be more along the lines of: "If I find out you lost your virginity before it is legal for you to do so, I will beat you within and inch of your life, take care of you until you heal, beat you AGAIN to make sure you never do it again, and home school your ass until you turn 18."
gaby904 0
Am I the only one who believes that people on this forum take things WAY too seriously!??? This was hilarious :-) The mother obviously meant it as a joke, sounds like something I would say! hahahaha
thefinalpie 0
#102 You're not the only one =) Reminds me of something my mom would say, but she also said she'd shoot me if I ever smoked =P
Audio828 2
You and the baby. good deal.
mothfather 0
LMAO. Hahahaha, nice.