Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Words is hard
Today, my seven year-old daughter called me a weirdo. When I yelled and grounded her, she cried and said she thought “weirdo” was a compliment. FML
Mommy issues
Today, both of my daughters were having an argument because my youngest has decided that she doesn't want kids. I defended her decision and my oldest daughter told me to STFU and called me a hypocrite. I slapped her across the face for her disrespect and now she's threatening to press charges. FML
Poor little bunny
Today, after I warned my son repeatedly that if he wanted a rabbit he had to clean and feed it, I checked on it. It wasn’t just dead, it was dead and rotting in a pool of its own pee and faeces. I yelled at him, but he just shrugged and told me rabbits are boring and he forgot it was even there. FML
Today, my daughter is still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML
Today, my sister called me a moron after I told her that no, healthy foods do not give you "negative calories". She's 21 and goes around telling everyone that she's an expert nutritionist. FML
Truth bomb
Today, my 4 year-old daughter thought it was funny that the chicken on her plate and chickens on farms are called the same name. I had my mouth full so I couldn’t stop my rotten eldest son from saying, “That’s because chicken is dead chickens.” Cue her crying while my son cackled like a sociopath. FML
Today, my 19 year-old brother called me a moron and told me to go read a book, after I corrected him when he said girls don't have colons. FML
Today, I was told that I was an idiot by a little girl because I didn't deliver a pizza to her house fast enough. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML
Ironic, isn't it?
Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML
Top comments
s15c 9
Well, it's your job to raise her.
malikorslip 3
Which came first, the rabbit or the egg? ... Yeah that doesn't sound right
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Comments (197)
s15c 9
Well, it's your job to raise her.
Suchagoonnn 4
Seriously. Kids these days need to be smacked every now and then so they can learn some respect.
Cad6 24
OP, it must be mentally eggscrutiating to hear that.
wierdos_rule 0
Maybe correcting her in a lighter manner, instead of saying she was "dead wrong" may have been more useful. Kids these days like to think they are being treated with mild respect, and having them think they are makes them respect you even more so, keeping you in control.
MrSassypants 34
40 only for some children. Some children would say "I don't give a ****" and "I'm grown, I could do whatever I want" because some children couldn't careless if they are respected and won't show respect back. Not trying to pull a "bankrupt" here but my little brother who is six treats everyone like crap no matter how nice, mean or any other thing to him.
Discombobulated9 12
Actually, I think it's the easter bunny that has a lot to answer for this eleven year old. I'm guessing that's how she got this idea stuck in her head.
littlenumber8 8
Get off your high horse 49. Your brother is 6 years old. Let him have some fun and live. If not call super nanny ...
desireev 18
49- I agree with you completely. I have seen too many bad situations like that. My fiancé and I just split 2 weeks ago because of his 11 year old son. He would always swing at me and smack me and spit on me. And he didn't care when or where he did it or who he was in front of. And the same goes for my 17 year old sister and my mother. The amount of disrespect in the younger generation is appalling! It, truly, is a heartbreaking situation. No matter how much respect you give them, they only spit on you. Literally, in my case!
teague95 16
^ situations like that don't you just wish you were a kid again just so it wouldn't be wrong to beat the little twerp
Dramori 29
It's because of the stupid gov't laws that prevent parents from beating the shite out of their evil kids that the world is so messed up now. 50 years ago people could smack their kid to teach the lesson that being a shit has repercussions, and they learned a modicum of respect for their elders... Nowadays you can't even raise your voice to them. See how kids acted then compared to now? Doesn't look like a coincidence does it? :p
SignUpisntcool 3
I'm with the easterbunny thing, and the child should have respect.
s15c 9
I'm pretty sure beating kids isn't going to help, it'll just make them bitter and more angry. That's kind of why it's illegal and stuff.
berichsoon 11
Beating kids helps at some point, when they first start acting up, yeah that might teach them that it's not ok because if they do they will get their butt whooped. But if you let it go and when it gets out of hand that's when you wanna be tough it doesn't work
tracker7 5
72 it's not beating them it's just like a slap on the cheek when they misbehave, it happened to me and I think everybody as a kid and I treat everyone with respect.
n_epic_fail 14
I blame the easter bunny handing out eggs -___-
teague95 16
It's illegal though because of abusive parents so it protects kids in those kind of situations, but it does suck for people just trying to correct their kids
Lludes 5
No beatings but a good ass paddling never hurts. I had my fair share of them and I turned out fine.
Mommyof2_91 10
GhyWow why does everybody tell people they should beat the shit out of there kids...? Raise them right in the first place, don't let them be subjected to the bullshit they learn it from, and in cases where you can't control what they are subjected to maybe a spanking or a light tap in the face depending on the age...or other punishments like grounded from friends, internet, cell phone... Kids hate that stuff and it limits the shit they can get subjected to. Beating them will only push them away and can cause them to be violent themselves. Plus once parents get into the habit of beating there kids, it likely will get worse... Then you hear stories how a kid back talked to their father and the 12 year old boy got broken ribs and facial bones..
Michaelsgirl04 9
91: any child young enough to be spanked has no business having a cell phone...just sayin
HeartOfLead 24
99- I agree fully with the first part about punishments. If one should hit their child at all they should AT LEAST be grounded for a while. If that doesn't work, then increase the period of time and add in a little "respect my authority" spanking. Children now a days act out because their parents are way too lenient. But @99, your example was out of line. A beating or to hit a child must be a consequence of his/her acting wrongful or disrespectful, not because "aww, my favorite team lost!".
HeartOfLead 24
99- sorry, I reread your comment and fully agree with what you said. Beating a child for little to no reason (as your example stated) is wrong and also is called child abuse which is illegal (and for good reasons).
nerobluerose 10
Rabbits do lay eggs... In World of Warcraft.
ALpein 0
When I was younger, my mom had "the spoon." It was wooden spoon and she'd smack us with it if we were disrespectful or something. So whenever we did something that was bad, she'd take it out and we'd be wonderful kids. It worked to a point but then I went through that "idgaf" phase and didn't care. Now, I love and respect my parents so much, they are the best. But the point is, hitting won't get your point across. I realize now what I did was wrong but before that, it wasn't explained to me so I didn't care if I did it or not, even if I got hurt for it. Does this make sense? I'm terrible at writing out my thoughts.
malikorslip 3
Which came first, the rabbit or the egg? ... Yeah that doesn't sound right
LSS_fml 18
The egg? I used to think rabbits laid eggs and they laid chocolate eggs especially for Easter. Why else would we have an 'Easter bunny' ? But now I know.
coffee_man900 16
Did someone lose a chicken? Just wondering.
hayyyyleyyyybaby_fml 14
easter bunnies lay jelly beans...der :)
Crimsos 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Moron!
ladyLALAA 29
I'd say the child is the moron in this case, also for speaking back to dad. I would have been grounded for weeks!
smtm2012 6
You're a dumbass
shantazat 0
Kids these days really need to learn to respect their parents...
daisy963 4
True .. And parents should be alot more knowledgable when it comes biology
Archer96 2
If I said that to one of my parents I'd either get slapped or get the belt right on the spot
KeyboardWarrior 10
Maybe in her world, rabbits lay eggs, and cows ribbit?
bonbon2020 8
You raised her...
Havin 19
He might have raised her, but which school does she go to??
erockinthesuburb 17
Only the Cadbury Bunny has eggs... Bawk bawk bawk bawk
sillycart 9
Nice...!
Heinousness 0
No lies there
klovemachine 24
Ah yeah :)
Cynical_in_SK 6
Ah...the American education system hard at work! FAIL!
sadistmonkey 19
I'm pretty sure most people who have been through the educational system in the US know that rabbits don't come from eggs.
hatesfate 6
Yeah because America's the only one with idiots who didn't pay attention in class. If only we could aspire to have great people from our country like Tom Green such as you...
G0odgrief 0
maybe she goes to Catholic school. we didn't have sex ed we had "family life"
teague95 16
She's also 11. Eleven year olds don't know everything. She'll learn
teague95 16
And thanks for stereotyping an entire country.
marinus_fml 20
Ahm, I actually have a brother who is 12 which isn't much older than 11, and he knows very well that rabbits don't lay eggs. I think we're underestimating OP at age 11, but I believe 99% of 11 year olds know rabbits don't lay eggs. As to whether pumpkins grow on trees or not, that's a little bit different.
SpottedZebra42 14
45 - Last time I checked, rabbit birth wasn't covered in sex ed classes....
G0odgrief 0
last time I checked the overall process is pretty much the same. i don't know about you but most people can grasp the basic idea as it applies to mammals in general without requiring a class on each on individually.
ladyLALAA 29
68 they've done studies where children up to 10 years didn't know milk comes from a cow.
G0odgrief 0
they probably think it grows in the grocery store. its not limited to children though. most adults know milk comes from cows but some don't realize it is the same milk baby cows drink.
taerts 9
I suppose she's an avid believer of the Easter Bunny?
idontknowyou123 0
Teach her how easter eggs comes to be: A rabbit fuckd a chicken
Mandybruin 15
Yep. Sounds about right.