Money: Today, my aunt asked if she and her boyfriend could stay with...

Does she know you're living in a motel? I know when I was living in one I was terrified something like that would happen because I would be forced to admit where I was staying.

amarie2009 22

Monday 13 March 2017 11:16

Say no, it's not that difficult!!!

TMO2142 25

Monday 13 March 2017 13:00

just say no, you dont have space

Colon_Man 17

Monday 13 March 2017 19:11

*panics* "No! I live in space!"

OhPuhleeze 23

Monday 13 March 2017 13:54

Sure aunt Jenny. You can stay with us. Just make a reservation though. Call 555MOTEL for booking.

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Today, I was at the airport, on my way to see my dad for the first time since I was four years-old. Whilst I was waiting for my dad to find me, a strange man started flirting with me. Irritated, I told him I was waiting for my dad to get me, and to fuck off. The strange man was my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 223

You deserved it 4 216

Today, I took my new boyfriend's virginity about 10 minutes ago. He kept whispering, "It’s inside you, it’s actually inside you… feels kind of sticky, slippery, it’s actually inside you I can’t believe it.” It was super off-putting and a bit creepy. And no, I definitely did not orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 610

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Random

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook from a girl I've had a crush on for a while. As I was about to accept it, it vanished. She explained later that she clicked on my name by accident, and didn't actually want to be friends at all. FML

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You deserved it 4 052

Today, I borrowed my 23-year-old son's laptop. The sticky keyboard gave me a good idea of his browsing history. FML

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You deserved it 14 111

Today, I was talking to my grandpa while he was gardening outside. Suddenly I feel this hard, salty thing fly into my mouth and I spit it out. It turned out to be a beetle. My grandpa takes one look at the beetle and says, "Well, at least that poor bug finally got you to shut up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 490

You deserved it 6 502

Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 342

You deserved it 68 793

Today, I was masturbating lying on the lower bed of my brother's and my bunk beds. I finished jacking off and tried to get up to clean myself I hit my head on metal panel of the upper bed and passed out. Later woke up in my bed... found out my parents came home and saw me passed out naked holding a porn mag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 391

You deserved it 47 272

Today, I'm pretty sure my husband of 8 years is sleeping with the skank who's in the fire department with him. Out of nowhere, he started texting her and wouldn’t come home until 12:30 a.m. for a whole week. When I confronted him about it, he flipped out. Sadly, it won’t be the first marriage she’s ruined. FML

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