Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, we had to re-live sex ed in my college biology class. Unlike in middle school, nobody giggled incessantly. However, the guy sitting next to me stared at me intensely for nearly the whole three hour lecture. FML
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated, "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML
Today, one of my preschool students hit me in the nuts in front of my whole class. If that wasn't bad enough, the blow to my crotch instantly triggered a very audible fart. FML
Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML
Today, I still get irrationally angry and distracted when my teacher refers to bodily functions as “poop, pee, number 1 & 2, etc.” and calls things icky. I’m literally in nursing school with an instructor who talks like Elmo. FML
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
Today, we were discussing evolution at the super-religious school I'm forced to attend. I mentioned homo sapiens, and my teacher mockingly replied, "You actually believe in homo sapiens? Hahahah!" The whole class started laughing. No, not at the teacher; at me. FML
Today, my teacher was giving a lecture about human genetics and how they are passed on to children. She projected a large picture of a baby on to the screen in the front of the room. I then joked about how this ugly baby must have some very unattractive parents. It was her baby. FML
Today, I was in music class and I was reaching for the pen I'd dropped, I tilted myself, gripping my left hand on the table, and the person beside me pulled my arm for some reason, and my face fell into their lap. Right on the crotch. It reeked of sweat. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
LadyGore 12
******!
Jchicas 0
this was the only comment needed for this post
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (255)
RussianFox 13
It's people like you that give Bronies a bad name.
alexicanaaa 7
You're an idiot.
shrimpygymnast 9
Vaginis
elmolostatcards 0
your not alone im learning about it to im very to myself and try not getting into this subject i recommend maybe you should try lol
Lyraa_fml 0
I like your hair! Lol.
johnel54 5
If you can't listen to those words like an adult you shouldn't be allowed to reproduce
bellygirl2000 0
I had to watch a video for health like that before and the start of it had a very detailed drawing of a guys testicals it was disturbing
tdawg4200 0
Testicles aren't disturbing, you're just a prude.
CryMoreFMLs 15
81 - I don't know. You haven't seen the shit they use as sprays for Team Fortress 2. *shudder*
xcarxcrashx 9
Penis penis penis, ****** ****** ******!
bubo_fml 11
Sounds like some substitute words are in order...From now on, request that your teacher refer to the male genitalia as either; ding or dingus, dilly, dick, ****, tally whacker, dooflungus, johnson, john thomas, wedding tackle, pork sword, etc, etc...Oh yeah, and the female genitalia as pussy...
clumsychik 1
Dooflungus?
loudema 5
Beetlejuice, beetlejuice, beetlejuice