Today, I was tutoring a band member. Whenever I ask him to play a D or any D scale, he stops just to snicker and say, "Ha ha. D." He still sucks. I hate his guts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had my high school piano recital. The entire time I was playing, one of my classmates sitting up front kept booing me and yelling "YOU SUCK" at the top of his lungs. He drowned out the entire song. FML
Today, I learned how to play "Happy Birthday" on the guitar, just to have my friend tell me that my voice sucks, and that I needed to stop immediately. FML
Today, I was happy to take a break and do a guitar performance, but my teacher was the rudest ever. He had his guitar at the front row, playing while I was, and he played the song live with me just to confuse me, and ending up ruining the performance. FML
Today, it's the third day of my dad's revenge after he snapped over me supposedly using the word "duh" in every other sentence. He got his hands on my old recorder and has been playing it loudly and out of tune outside my room when I try to do my homework. My mom thinks this is hilarious. FML
Today, I went to my kid's band concert. She's 12 and in the advanced team. They were the first ones to play and they were so incredibly bad that I laughed. Really, really loud. I was escorted out of the recital. FML
Today, I had my final piano performance. There is a guy in my class who constantly tells me I suck at piano, so I was looking forward to watching him play badly since he never practices. Instead, he played the most beautiful music that would make Mozart weep. He got a standing ovation. FML
Today, I was teaching a ten year old how to play piano. Halfway through the lesson, she made a minor mistake, which, trying to be a good tutor, I corrected her. She smiled up at me, paused, then slammed the key cover down onto my fingers. FML
Today, my dad had fun embarrassing me as much as possible in my parent-teacher conference by moaning whenever the teacher talked. FML
Today, I had a music duet in front of a crowd and 3 judges. I play tuba and my partner plays the saxophone. He burst out laughing in the middle of it because one note that I played sounded like a fart. FML
Today, as I went into my calculus class, the teacher announced that someone had received a negative grade on the test we were getting back. I laughed and said, "Which f*cker managed to get a negative?" Turns out I'm the dumbass. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
You should tell him to play F. As in "F you".
s0m3guy2010 21
Maybe not. According to OP, the boy sucks on the D.
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Comments (74)
DocBastard 40
You should tell him to play F. As in "F you".
Damian95 16
Or tell him he's B-ing an idiot.
Reaper1984 13
Or tell him he's B-ing an A-hole
sonicgreg 12
GG
jjessen 20
You could always just tell him, C-ya
MidnaLink 35
Tell him "G, you're hopeless!"
asimplesharpie 7
Oh I'm sorry. But just think. One day you'll actually go somewhere and he'll be stuck in a 6th grade mindset.
_DudeGuy_ 16
Op, you might hate his guts, but you love the rest of him! Is that why you want him to give you a D?
Talooka 10
Tell him he's really good and build up his confidence to play in front of a crowd. After he's booed off stage, tell him his performance gets him a D.
SoulAmeliorate 16
He wants the D Someone better D-liver it!
Welshite 40
Deliver my liver, please.
_DudeGuy_ 16
Welshite, if you don't like liver? Oh well, more for me >:D
Welshite 40
#17: Aren't you just the selfish one?
_DudeGuy_ 16
Welshite, you better not get between me and my food >:). My mom tried that once... ONCE.
Welshite 40
I'm tougher than your mother. There's nothing better than biting into raw liver, and feeling the blood drip down your chin. I use the blood on my hands to paint pictures too. My best drawing so far has been of a flower.
perdix 31
But I thought Snickers really satisfy. Hey, you get paid by the hour, so the more time he wastes with Beavis and Butthead humor, the more you get paid for doing nothing.
_DudeGuy_ 16
Where does it say "by the hour"? I've been tutored by the class before. Not to forget, if the kid doesn't learn anything, OP could get fired.
Sir_ND_Pity 35
19 - It is fair for 6 to make the assumption that it is by the hour since that is how most tutoring services charge. Also, there is a difference between negligence and unwillingness on the part of the tutor and on the part of the student. If the student is unwilling to learn and purposely not trying to learn, that is not the fault of the tutor. OP is more likely to quit than get fired.
SneezyC 15
I'm in band and unless op has private tutoring with people, op doesn't get paid. I've been tutored when I switched instruments, I got tutored during band class at school.
olpally 33
I like the way you rhymed op, it made me chuckle! Lol. What an immature "D-ick" though.
s0m3guy2010 21
Maybe not. According to OP, the boy sucks on the D.
\ 28
He really needs to extract the D from his brain.
HowieDoIt 21
F him up like a G, B4 he makes you go any more crazy.
perdix 31
My gut tells me this douche won't be giving anyone an O anytime soon.
_DudeGuy_ 16
I'm going to be honest, I am sitting here trying to figure out what that even means. Will someone be kind enough to inform me?
THuD29 4
I haven't but I get what it means, but whatever sometimes people can be slow
PrincessLiLi_fml 7
It's sad you admitted that, 38