Today, I was in the grocery store getting bananas and there was this real hot guy next to me. He said, "Hey beautiful" so I smiled. He then asked if I was free on Friday night. I smiled and said, "Yes, why do you ask?" He looked up from the bananas and pointed to the bluetooth in his ear. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sitting beside this cute guy on a bench. Suddenly, he goes, "I know we don't know each other very well, but would you like to have dinner on Saturday?" I turn to him with a goofy smile, and exclaim "I'D LOVE TO!" He gives me a weird look, turns his head and points to his Bluetooth. FML
Today, at work a woman came up to the check out counter and when I greeted her she said "oh honey, you are so beautiful!" I immediately smiled and thanked her, then she looked at me and said "oh, not you." and then pointed to her ear. She was on her bluetooth. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to go on a date with me tomorrow. His reaction was to pick up a banana and pretend that he was in the middle of a phone call. FML
Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML
Today, I was at the mall and I noticed this guy staring at me from across the food court. He smiled and waved at me so I walked over there and tried to talk to him. He was looking at his girlfriend the whole time. FML
Today, I was having lunch at a cafe. There was an attractive guy looking at me from another table. I smiled back and gave a little wink. A minute later he approached me. I introduced myself and asked if he wanted my number. He said, "Um, no but what are you eating? It looks really good" FML
Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
Today, I tried talking to the very quiet girl in my grade. We were having a conversation when a very hot guy walked into the cafeteria. I said to the girl, "The things I would do for him…" She looked at me dead in the eye and said, "That's my boyfriend." FML
Today, I was flirting with this guy that had been forced to be my lab partner for class. He was really funny and attractive, too. In the middle of our conversation he said "You're so cute! You remind me of my boyfriend!" FML
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Top comments
crystal_clear 0
This is when "eye contact" comes in handy. If someone is asking you out, I'd say about 99% of the time they would be looking directly at you, not the bananas.
blackhawk465 0
Normally people talking on the bluetooth are the ones who look like retards. In this situation it was the other way around. :P
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Comments (208)
ogloc 0
Whoa. OP, you must be the easiest person ever.
jmeg_fml 0
haha aw. i think that kind of thing happens pretty often. as much as i wish the eye contact idea were true, i've definitely had people look me in the eye and say "hi, how are you?"... to the person on the other end of the bluetooth.
Caddy23 0
Lol head desk moment. Oh and btw people, grow a sense of humor and stop nit-picking every ******* fml.
nammz 0
I hate people who are on their bluetooth in places where a bluetooth really isn't necessary.
shelbcz 0
i hate those things, they annoy me. plus, people earing them always look ridiculous and pompous.
ohhfudge 0
bahaha
happygoluckyhh 0
This is just like one from two weeks ago.
lydiajosephine 0
This reminds me of that scene in the remake of Freaky Friday.
omfgglol 0
oh my god, i would be so ridiculously embarassed.
ZuraLasgeon 0
I effing hate people on Bluetooth. Ugh that kinda stuff has happened to me working as a cashier.