Today, I spent two hours making a cake that I'd promised my class for weeks. I boarded the train to school, but soon dozed off. A few minutes later, I awoke with a start and noticed a chunk of the cake missing and a homeless man next to me with frosting around his mouth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up early and spent hours baking and icing a three-tier cake for my friend's eighteenth birthday, which is this evening. I just found out my mother threw it in the compost bin because she's on a diet and it was "tempting" her. FML
Today, I spent hours baking a multi-layered, detailed cake from scratch for my mom's birthday. It took two seconds for my dog to devour the cake while I picked up a spoon I dropped on the floor. FML
Today, I wanted to be nice to my boyfriend and buy him a cake. Not only did I drop it in the bus, when I got home I forgot that I'd put it on my bed, and sat on it. FML
Today, I bought a cake. I then immediately forgot what I was carrying, opened the door to my car, and tossed the bag into the back seat. FML
Today, I woke up early to bake cinnamon rolls for a party. I came home later to find the whole tray spilled onto the floor, most of the rolls eaten, and my dog sitting happily nearby. FML
Today, I volunteered to bring a homemade dessert to a family dinner. I made a cheesecake, decorated it beautifully, and carried it across town on the train. When I arrived, everyone complimented it. Then I realized I'd forgotten the removable bottom of the pan, so the cheesecake was still sitting inside a metal ring and couldn't be served. FML
Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML
Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML
Today, someone brought cake to class. Trying to get some attention from the guy I have a crush on, I asked if he wanted my piece of cake. He accepted it, and then offered it to another girl. FML
Today, it's my birthday and I was very happy. When the moment came to blow the candles, all of the decoration on the cake flew off. It had taken an hour to make and set them on the cake. FML
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Top comments
super3286 14
wow dont fall asleep in public transportation
docscientist 10
The homeless have birthdays too.
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Comments (175)
xxxkittykatxxx 0
Eh. I wouldn't have minded. :) A lot of the homeless in my area are veterans suffering from mental illness...or they were laid off, no matter how hard they worked. :/
Johnnieeeeee 0
"today I fed a homeless man. fml."
SadinSherman 16
Don't fall asleep on the bus
SexyGamerNerd110 8
lol I totally just pictured the hobo from Invader Zim.. OP, did you at least ask if he liked the cake?
catstuff 0
aw. not an FML.
Connorisawesome 0
All you people who say he deserves the cake because he's homeless.... You are retarded. what if you took a test and earned a perfect score. Now let's say your name was replaced with someone else's name and all the teacher had to say about it was "He deserves he, he gets bad grades." I know you'd be pisses. On top of it all how nutritious is a cake really gonna be? A homeless person doesn't need taste but nutrients.... So please quit speaking
Connorisawesome 0
*What "he deserves it, he gets bad grades" and last of all pissed*
TheNewGuy03 29
i generally have tacit approval of grammar nazism, but you just corrected three typos. everyone makes typos. |the kid|
sallen0046 4
So you're saying less fortunate people should have to starve instead of eating foods that are less nutritious than other foods? You're name changing situation is completely irrelevant. It in no way makes your point.
Connorisawesome 0
So cake has almost no nutrients, he should be stealing better food if he's going to steal it anyways
SaRah_In_LoVe 0
I would throw the rest of the cake at him. Really,I would.
truthbetoldxoxo 0
so what! he probably needed it more anyway. this is not a FML.
Kehaulani1994 0
haha he knows wazzup. I'd do the same :D
elblake 0
wow, i never thought i would see feeding a homeless man as an fml