Today, I received a gift certificate from my grandmother for a local bookshop. Considering how broke I am, this would be a fantastic gift. If the bookshop in question wasn't a right-wing evangelical Christian Bookshop, and I wasn't Jewish. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found a gift card under my bed that I lost a few months ago for $400 to a store that went out of business last week. FML
Today, the only birthday present I got was a gift card to a steak house. Not a bad gift, but I'm a vegan. FML
Today, the first gift I opened was from my uncle. It was $80 in clothes that I'd bought for myself a week earlier. FML
Today, my brother inherited a book from our grandmother that, in his ignorance, he donated to a charity shop because he’s “not a big reader”. I raced to buy it back, but someone had already bought it. The book in question: a mint condition, 1954 first edition Lord of the Rings, valued at £5000. FML
Today, I received a pair of earrings, a necklace, and some rings as a Christmas gift from my grandma. This would have been nice if I weren't a guy. This is her way of mocking me for wearing what she calls "girl colors", such as white. FML
Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML
Today, I received a late Christmas present from my estranged father. I was really excited, having neither seen nor heard from him in nearly two years. It was a $200 gift card for a store that only exists in Canada. I don't live in Canada. Not even close. FML
Today, I gave over $100 to my online friend in presents for Christmas, only to find out he can't use any because of his strict parents. FML
Today, my girlfriend donated most of my book collection because she got me a Kindle for Christmas. Some were signed, including my Harry Potters. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My grandma gave me a hug and a check after wishing me a happy birthday and walked away giggling. I was excited because it was the only gift I had gotten all day. Ten minutes later, I realized that it was actually just my tax refund. FML
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Top comments
ComoEsJuan 24
Jesus Christ what a gift!
TheGolfGTI 24
Don't jewish it was a different gift?
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Comments (47)
ComoEsJuan 24
Jesus Christ what a gift!
Adeptus_Astartes 22
You know, the Jewish believed Jesus to be a very holy profit. Also, conservatives tend to have a favorable view towards Jewish people, especially Israelites. Shouldn't be a problem unless they are KKK members or Orthodox Protestants.
imapartypooper 15
Ok. Jews never believed that Jesus was a prophet and they believe that they messiah has not yet come. That is one of the main differences between Jews and Christians. If you do not believe me, please use google. It can help at times.
Adeptus_Astartes 22
@51 I never said they saw him as the son of God. I also meant prophet, not profit. I guess not literal prophet but some Jews do believe so. They do view Jesus as a respected teacher though.
the_zero_article 15
53, most Jews really don't. The whole 'blasphemy' thing was kind of a big deal, and also the centuries of torture and oppression at the hands of Christians really didn't help
ZeldaPaulThingy 17
Wow, you can't even spell prophet.
val_is_lame97 12
dang :/ it was still thoughtful though
marcranger 29
Maybe "thoughtful" as in Grandma put a lot of thought into it, but definitely not in a pleasant way if it was intended to be a disapproving comment on OP 's religion. I actually hope it was a thoughtless gift, given the alternatives.
kimco26 12
they dont always sell only Christian books tho
MrSassypants 34
Yeah, I hear they have Harry Potter. Except with all the "devil magic" taken out. It's about three pages long.
Codezlol 21
Go there and buy something really cheap, use the gift certificate, get the difference of the gift certificate, goto a bookshop of your choosing, and buy a book fitted for you.
rieebee 23
In most stores over here, you don't get cash back on gift certificates, only a 'remainder note' that can be used within the valid period of time for the certificate.
Codezlol 21
Oh really?? Lame! I didn't actually look to see where the FML was coming from. Excuse my ignorance!
TanzWolf 26
Buy books at the bookshop and sell them at a different one to get money and then buy books at the new bookstore?
tantanpanda 26
that would be nice, but selling books yields minute profits. I'm betting the books they sell at the book store will only sell for a fourth of the price elsewhere. sell 4 books will maybe get you one decent book, but not much more.
devildog562 33
Maybe they sell coffee and pastries.
Enslaved 38
Get a Bible and just read the first half.
royal_ranger 12
Comedy?...
royal_ranger 12
Ahh ok, thanks for the tip.
sturschaedel 27
Wouldn't it rather be in fetish&erotica, given all the incest and other sex stories?
LittleRed79 39
@30: Yeah, all that begetting sure was naughty.
annarcheer 19
you could use it and buy presents for other people.
Posthuman 26
OP is Jewish, so I don't think he would be celebrating Christmas. And I don't know too many people who give out gifts for someone else's holiday.
Setareh23 34
They can also use the card for birthday gifts; almost everyone celebrates those. Or buy some of the fairly generic items for themselves (ex: pens/stationary which don't have actual Christian quotes but more sort of general morals quotes or stuff from the old testament)
ned diggers 14
Jews don't believe in giving, just taking. Ask Palestine.
TheGolfGTI 24
Don't jewish it was a different gift?
emile_heskey 11
Had to read that twice
odod777 28
I'm sure you can find something there.
ChristianH39 30
Yea, right wing evangelical Christian literature.
howtobestupid 16
She did it to spite you