Today, I heard whimpering while I was in my bedroom. Thinking it was my parents doing something nasty, I let them do it and turned on my music. My parents came home from work and I realised they were never home. I went into the room and saw my dead dog laying on the floor. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to my whole room ruined, it was a mess and everything was torn and chewed up. I suddenly see a dog walk across the hall. I don't have a dog. FML
Today, I woke up to a note from my parents saying we needed to talk. Assuming it was about the weed I'd left on my dresser, I quickly confessed. Turns out my dog died. FML
Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house and I heard a strange sound. I laughed and said, "It sounds like a dog throwing up!" He listened for a second and said, "That's my mom crying downstairs." FML
Today, I thought I was home alone, so I started singing to my cat. After a half hour of this, I finally stopped. Then I heard applauding. I turned around to find my parents standing in my doorway. FML
Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML
Today, I heard a scream that sounded suspiciously like my cat when he's just had a nightmare or is otherwise in a state of extreme distress. I found him chilling on my couch, so I walked back to my room, when I heard the scream again. I ran back and he was still chilling. It was my neighbor's son screaming outside. FML
Today, I went to move my dog that had been napping in the middle of my bed for the last few hours, only to discover that he wasn't napping. He died. FML
Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML
Today, I was talking to my mother when we both heard a continuous buzzing noise. Unable to locate the source of the noise we gave up. About an hour later, my mother yells down the stairs to me. Turns out my dog stole my vibrator, chewed it and presented it to my mother. FML
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Top comments
metakingt 0
how the hell does a dog dying sound like your parents having sex?
ISellHerbs 0
It was going to happen anyway whether you could have gotten it to a vet or not, there just wasn't enough time. But if you are used to dealing with your parents engaging in those activities, you need draw some borders.
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Comments (219)
doof_fisch 2
She was in her room! (She says that she turned on her music.) While she was in her room, she heard whispering noises coming from her parents' bedroom. She assumed they were having sex. Later, she realized that her parents weren't even home, so it must have been something/someone else making that noise in her parents' bedroom. She checked their room and found the dog there lying dead.
nesscafe_fml 17
wow u failed as well. she heard whimpering not whispering you idiot.
Chopperman_fml 0
That's gross. Who put your dead dog in your parents' bedroom? What kind of sick person would do such a thing?
addie_love 0
first of all why would your parents be doing that in your room? second your poor dog.
boboluvsme 0
It's so funny how much people read into some of these postings. Where in this posting did she say anything about someone breaking in?!?! Couldn't agree more with #68. Too funny. Some of you guys are just plain dumb. Sorry for your loss OP.....
FromCFL 0
Must've been hearing the Dead Dog Whisperer.
cr1_wc2009 0
The character limit probably caused her to cut out a lot of the context. This totally sucks, leave her grammar alone.
ChunAsperEndao 0
Yeah, there's no way this is true.
angiebby 0
dude, he heard whispering coming from HIS ROOM, of course he thought his parents were having sex in there. jeez.
nonsenboi 0
guys read properly and not imagine so many things? she heard whispering in her bedroom. she didnt say her parents were doing anything. its normal to hear things across walls if they're loud. and she said "my dead dog" which means no one could have left a dead dog there and the whispering were probably the dog suffering or suffocating. no one broke in and no one did it in her room. she heard noises in her room probably from somewhere else get it? geez!
netfreak 0
shitty deal. i always get suspicious though if my dog is missing, as that usually means a few emptied garbage cans around the house