Today, I came out as bisexual to my friends via group message. They didn't respond; I had a panic attack. An hour later, one of my friends texted back, "k". FML
adirom tells us more.
adirom 14
Thanks for all your support (or lack there of in some cases) for those of you wondering why I told them over text, my friends and I are very close and have a group message with just the 4 of us, the topic came up and I took the opportunity. I have social anxiety, and decided for the sake of my sanity that would work best. And after my one friend replied "k" there were multiple texts saying they supported me and didn't think of me any differently (which was my worry). So it all turned out for the best! To all of y'all who think being bisexual isn't a big deal, coming out regardless is a big deal. So please try and open your mind to how difficult it is to stray from social norms!
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Top comments
Enslaved 38
Their silence probably means they're "k" with it. Just as long as you're happy with whom you are.
Tthug 34
Gay is the new norm. It's not even cool to come out as gay anymore. The real edgy people are coming out as ebola victims.
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Comments (202)
briang959 47
Maybe they thought you were hitting on them.
Jreslier 15
Great observation.
Ebolaconflict 11
how come noone says anything when I admitted I was straight. equality ppl!!
cjwayy 22
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Because being straight is a social norm that requires no coming out. People assume you're straight unless you say otherwise. Straight people don't have to worry about being rejected by friends and family.
Tthug 34
Gay is the new norm. It's not even cool to come out as gay anymore. The real edgy people are coming out as ebola victims.
limabeans101029 21
Why is 52 getting downvoted? It's true, in the sense that straight people don't have to worry about getting rejected by friends and family because of their sexuality
Gittoh 21
because #39 was being sarcastic.
cdawg69 10
thank you for your insight..
ZombieSazza 34
Just because you like both genders and you're telling your friends this, doesn't mean you're hitting on them. Genuinely one of the worst things about telling someone that you're bi, they assume that you're attracted to them and are hitting on them. Please, don't flatter yourselves.
2i1337i2iscore 13
#52 people are rejected by others for infinite number of unfair reasons. The social norm is not heterosexuality anymore. Publicly making your sexuality a big deal to others is the opposite of having people accept who you are- and focusing on accepting one part about you. That is the same as saying your sexuality is what defines you. While coming out to yourself can be a milestone in development, the relevance to being accepted by others, in a public way, is purely for personal gain. He sent a text, extremely impersonal, to his friends all at once- not talking to them individually. Most people in this generation do not care- which is a passive acceptance of all sexuality as normal.
subgub2222 16
Ya your right I'm sure the people who come out to their family's and get kicked out of rejected by their friends don't think it's "cool". You have no idea what those people have to deal with of how ******* scary it is to come out, so **** off
gh05t_ 7
why the hell does this have so many negative votes? it's true, and it's what I and many others are fighting against.
PinkieKeen 20
Well, that's queer.
xLIGHTS_fml 23
Don't let it get to you OP. Unless they were all responding immediately before you came out, I wouldn't worry too much. If they are your real friends they will accept you for who you are. You're still the same person.
fortune789 17
#4, That's kind of what I was thinking. I'm today's times, I doubt anyone really cares. One of my closest friends came out gay last year because her sister let it slip. She was terrified it would be a big ordeal, but her parents just kind of said, "that's great, we still love you just as much." This situation was probably similar.
VonBlitzkrieg 27
Actually, it seems to me like they simply just don't give a damn either way. Either that or they already had their reasons to suspect.
Enslaved 38
Their silence probably means they're "k" with it. Just as long as you're happy with whom you are.
lil_ham1644 29
*who
Helpfulman 17
This is actually probably one of the best things that could've happened in this situation. It means that OP's friends are cool with it and it changes nothing about their current relationship.
jerryj 27
Who has been responsible for the recruitment of Grammar Nazis lately? Seems like their quality is dropping.
sturschaedel 27
This. If they would have gushed out stuff like "OMG, really, are you sure, I can't believe it!" and THEN fallen silent, that would have been bad. This non-response probably just means that they aren't rattled by it.
ohSNAPyall 27
Not rattled and/or didn't want to be the first one to respond if someone had texted this as a "prank."
SaltyLurker 10
Sometimes it's "who!" - Monica from F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
phew_fml 21
Some people just can't deal with things like that. You should've told them in person, that would at have given you a straight answer.
cocacola999 27
Agreed. Especially in a group message it's difficult to be the first one to reply.
Tthug 34
It's just unnecessarily awkward in a group. Definitely not a solid play. Furthermore I hate group messaging because then you get ALL the messages, even if you only know 2-3 people on the list.
flutterby789 8
or, they didn't reply because they already new n it wasnt reply worthy?
atav 17
Haha way to slip the pun in there.
Blippety 23
Perhaps they didn't reply because just don't think it's a big deal? Which is actually really good thing, since it means it doesn't phase them and they're completely cool with it.
llamarrama01 21
Probably means they don't think it's a big deal. When my friend came out to me I really didn't think much of it.
theaaxis 27
... your friend Cas, by any chance? ;)
llamarrama01 21
He's my angel
ohSNAPyall 27
I had a friend who came out as bi to me, when almost no one else knew. He was so shaken up about what he had to say that I thought he was going to say he was suicidal. I was relieved when he finally told me. His other friends and family know now, and he seems less anxious in general. I'm glad for him.
obnum 19
We all freak out over things that are really big in our minds. To your friend, you coming out wasn't much of a big deal, you're still their friend and that's that. At least, that's how I see it
2i1337i2iscore 13
Well said.
orbit 22
Pandas unite!
martin8337 36
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe they thought that have sex you had to buy it.
sarah5745 41
Where did you pull that from?
cocacola999 27
What does it even mean, with that terrible syntax? Is Yoda on meth?
llamarrama01 21
His corn shoot.
LocsOn 13
sounds like you just want the attention
Adm_Twigs 19
Could "have" been better