Today, at work, there was some teenage hoodlums outside in our parking lot. When I tell them to leave, one of the bigger guys steps up and says "I'll kick your ass!". I yell "No balls!", to the teen. He then whips me to the ground and sits on my face, proving to me that he did. FML
noballs
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Top comments
xHaniffax 0
Even if he had "no balls", you most certainly have "no brain".
disney_blonde 16
"Teenage hoodlums"? How old you you? Just shake your cane at them and let it go.
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Comments (144)
boomlol 0
First. just to piss ya all off ... if your aproaching teenages make sure to a knife m8 they will clear off...
ReasonsToFly 0
YDI for being an Asian convenient store owner.
Nak14 0
Shut the hell up. At least this guy has a job.
Nak14 0
WHAT??
missmeliss0309 0
wait... why did he say "No balls!"? That's a really stupid comeback... he could have at least said the entire sentence. Is this a common phrase?
FarSide 23
Not common in KY. Next time, say "No Teeth".
rae_o_sunshine 0
legit.
lunytunes88 0
YDI for not speaking in complete sentences. Were you trying to be cool? And yes, I only replied to the first comment so mine is read.
pen_island21 0
when he said no balls, he probably meant that the person didn't have enough balls to actually kick his ass
azhein 0
I live in southern IN 10 minutes from KY that used to be a very common statement where I live.
Cjw1220 0
I lived in kentucky for 13 years until my dad got a job in VA a few weeks ago. I never heard that statement.
thumbelina 0
YDI.
AnthonyxD_fml 0
Lol owned
mmplayer 0
haha T-bag
xHaniffax 0
Even if he had "no balls", you most certainly have "no brain".
xHaniffax 0
Yes I'm well aware of that. He yelled "no balls" as if to provoke the person and he got a reaction and he deserved it. It was a stupid thing to do so that's why he has "no brain". I think you need a brain yourself and a pinch of common sense.
untoldfame 3
this post makes no sense. He sat on your face to show he had no balls??
TheHeroOfTime 0
A ******* thermometer could figure out that he sat on the OP's face to prove that he did in fact have balls, you inane sacrum.
letitbe56 0
Inane sacrum...what a bizarre insult!
porsche944 0
i guess it's supposed to mean dumb ass LOL
FFPianoDude 2
this comment wins. a THERMOMETER could figure it out
Entracte 0
You, my dear sir, are a ******* beast.
NotAnotherOne 0
Come on, this has to be fake. "I'll kick your ass"? Nobody just walks up to someone and says that.
Ringmaster1 0
You fail to understand how some teenagers act when trying to be the tough guy. Just...no, not fake.
NotAnotherOne 0
Huh, misread the OP. Nevermind. YDI for approaching a bunch of 'hoodlums' and asking them to leave. What did you think was going to happen?
theanonimouse 0
I clicked YDI simply because he used the term "teenage hoodlums." I mean, really? Also, the OP fails at English, so no sympathy here. :)
yaintime21 0
"Hoodlum refers to a young male thug, ruffian, or misanthrope." looks right to me.
genius_man16 1
dude, wtf is your problem? The OP should get major BONUS points for using that term. It's pretty awesome. ^_^ I think YOU are just a hoodlum. DOHOHOHO
theanonimouse 0
Okay, the entire FML is an English fail. I'm not saying the term "teenage hoodlum" is incorrect, just that it's overused and completely ridiculous. The worse English fail comes from lack of subject/verb agreement and the generally horrible syntax of the whole thing.
ashleeee 0
lol thanks webster !! i love the word hoodlums!
DeathMetal666 0
YDI for not pulling a knife out and stabbing the shit out of the faggots. I do it all the time and scares the living daylights out of these punk ass faggots.
Plumppotato 3
well yea if i saw you pull out a knife and start stabbing a bunch of gay people id be a little scared too. unless you were only stabbing gay people. then id be safe. but still a little scared.
ajsciri4 0
All talk
rainergeis 0
You're a little homophobic aren't you Potato?
TheKitsune 0
This is why GUNS are AWESOME.
wingedspiritus 0
This is why YOU are RETARDED. Ugh. :/
SheriffBart 0
Back when I was sheriff of Rock Ridge, we had a similar problem. A politically connected gang of hoodlums, rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists wanted to bust up the town and run the people out. We didn't need guns to take care of the problem. We simply used paint, lumber and dynamite. Worked like a charm.
metalmanx12 0
LOL #84 that made my day
TheKitsune 0
I'm retarded because I don't think it's wrong to pull a gun to defend yourself? Look at the crime rate in LA where you have to jump through hoops to get a gun, then look at the state of texas before you go off about how "guns are bad". Now shoo.
nolicnosnhoj 1
Outlaw guns and only outlaws will have guns
TheHeroOfTime 0
YDI for not having the balls to protect yourself, pussy.