Today, at a school function for my eldest son, my youngest child silently passed gas. A group of women I had hoped to befriend were sitting next to me, and then left with looks of disgust on their faces. I guess I don't need friends. FML
Denise1988 tells us more.
The little stinker is only 9 months old and while his stench was quite atrocious that day, I wish they hadn't rushed off so soon. The event was outside and it was a breezy day. I have no problem with him doing his thing, I just wished the women had at least come back and tried to include me in their conversations. We moved away from our home state two years ago and I've had a hard time meeting new friends, it's so hard as an adult. I hope it's easier the next time we move.
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Tripartita 45
This is why I was raised to keep my bodily functions down to a minimum in public. In addition to not farting, I also don't eat, breath, blink, or metabolize carbohydrates in others' company. As a result, my parents are incredibly popular.
Steve95401 49
Of course, none of them have ever passed gas before. Shocking!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (36)
Tripartita 45
This is why I was raised to keep my bodily functions down to a minimum in public. In addition to not farting, I also don't eat, breath, blink, or metabolize carbohydrates in others' company. As a result, my parents are incredibly popular.
MzZombicidal 36
Probably because they produced a medical anomaly! :P
amberlys2025 9
the kid is 9 months give it a break
cr500guy 11
These are GROWN women? Only physically I presume:/
uchihastephy88 25
Sure, blame the kid...
Scorpio01 16
No farts no friends...
kaotic_angel88 24
Friends are overrated anyway.
Jenissa81 8
Sounds like your kid helped you screen out which people would make lousy friends. That was a perfect opportunity for a good fart joke and they blew it.
allforfun 23
There is no shame in (figuratively) throwing your son under the bus for that one.
writergirl1029 17
I guess they have magical children who don't fart and have never embarrassed them in public.
GAeroNKissR 26
My oldest (1st grader) farted during a quiet moment with other parents seated around us & then he exclaimed, "mom!?" As embarrassed as I was, I also wanted to high five him for being so quick & clever to try & push the blame, haha
speakfreely 21
Well I don't have friends either so I guess we can be friends now op (: