Today, I scratched my cornea and have to wear a large bandage covering my eye. I'm off today, but I'll probably have to wear it to school tomorrow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got stung by a bee. On my eyelid. I'm allergic so it's swollen up so much, I can't even open my eye. Tomorrow is the first day of a new prestigious school. I either have to go to school wearing an eye-patch or walk around looking like a monster. FML
Today, I fell and got a nasty cut above my right eye. The doctor in the ER sealed the wound with surgical glue. He also glued his glove to my eyebrow, and let glue run onto my eyelid. Not only do I have a scar and medical bill, I now have no eyebrow or eyelashes on my right eye. FML
Today, I broke my glasses. My eyesight is horrible, I can’t see things that aren’t super close to my face. I'm supposed to drive to another state tomorrow. FML
Today, while I was applying some eyeliner, my cat jumped onto the counter and managed to headbutt me. The wand scratched a good portion of my eyeball, and now for the next few weeks, I will have to deal with the pain of a corneal abrasion. FML
Today, I started my brand new job. I was late because while repairing my favorite pair of high heels, I got Superglue in my eye. They had to scrape my cornea and I have to wear an eye patch. I'm now the "New pirate" in the office. FML
Today, my contact ripped in half in my eye. One half fell out, but the other half got stuck too far under my eyelid. An hour and $100 later, Urgent Care finally got it. FML
Today, I was working on my computer when my dad walks in, pointing his finger at me like a gun. Before I could even ask, it turns out he was aiming a rubber band at me. The doctor says I'll be able to take off my eyepatch in a couple of days. FML
Today, I shattered a coffee pot at work and ended up with a piece of glass in my eye. Now I have to look like a pirate until its healed, and it's nowhere near Halloween. FML
Today, I accidentally stuck my thumb into my eye and scratched myself just under my eyebrow. I don't know why my hand was anywhere near my eye. FML
Today, my band went to play a set for the first time. I'm the drummer. All was going well, and then before our first song I threw the sticks in the air, went to catch them, and one hit me right in the eye. I couldn't continue playing. Now I have to wear an eyepatch. FML
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Top comments
StephanieSays 0
Don't be a weenie. My friend got a paper cut on her eye and is now partially color blind.
mister_moops 0
i don't understand. are you crying because you have to wear the bandage or because of the scratch?
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Comments (70)
Cloudbush 0
Talk like a pirate all day.
bdunc13 0
I know how that feels that happened to me this summer it sux. it only lasts like a week and a half
xXZToonLinkZXx 0
Dude, OMYGOD, this should be on MLIA, not FML, damm this is awesome!!
Anteezy 7
Arrrrrrr
thelittlebeast01 0
woooow what are you a french frog take it like a man you nancy
inestimable_fml 8
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum!
kevtj 4
Pirates are cool
ZoZo17_fml 0
boo ******* hoo. I had to wear one. not a ******* FML, idiot.
blackopskiller 0
I had to wear a eye patch to school. it sucked bad
blackeyedchicken 0
suck it up princess