Today, I woke up after having a nightmare that my girlfriend broke up with me. Needing reassurance, I told her about it. She became furious with me saying that she'd never do that and called me an "inconsiderate fucking bastard for even thinking that." Then she broke up with me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5am to tell me she was mad at me. Apparently I did something bad in her dream. She still won't talk to me. FML
Today, I had a nightmare and woke up in a cold sweat. My girlfriend was in bed with me at the time, and swears I yelled out another girl's name. She considers this proof that I'm cheating on her, and now she won't even speak to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML
Today, I woke up from an amazing dream I was having about my girlfriend. We were laughing and holding hands, the kind of dream I wanted to stay asleep for. When I finally got up, I was excited to tell her about the dream but then I remembered. We broke up a week ago. FML
Today, the girl of my dreams that I've been dating for months called me. Apparently she's been having recurring nightmares of me cheating on her. She dumped me "just in case." FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year broke up with me because I didn't fight some guy that started hitting her right in front of me... In a dream. She was totally serious. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I angrily texted her, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. Five minutes later I get a picture of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother, saying, "Shut the fuck up, she had appendicitis." FML
Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend that said, "Dude, I think she knows I'm going to break up with her." FML
Today, I went to see my girlfriend to talk about my anxiety, because it's been a big issue. She broke up with me instead. FML
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Top comments
Vegeto30294 19
Its obvious that you're psychic and saw it coming beforehand. However, you can only use this power in your sleep.
WeAreAHurricane 14
Who said dreams didn't come true?
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Comments (144)
fukmefreddy 4
you sound clingy... not inconsiderate, and honestly I don't see how your birth, illegitimate or otherwise, has anything to do with your clinginess.
kelseymill124 0
Is she bi-polar?
D0n41d 7
Lol
Guilty21 3
I'm thinking it's a good thing because she got rid of herself for you
parkwaydrive7 9
Eh **** her, you're better off without her anyway
zuzupetalsYO 11
Cool! You're psychic!
Big_lama6 7
God this sounds like my demonic ex girlfriend haha
The_F3rris 11
This is like an episode of Thats So Raven.
graphicstyle7 17
Your dream was your subconscious telling you to break up with this nasty person. Really, there are nicer girls out there.
Solipsist 12
she's upset that you didn't notice her freshly bleached asshole.