ugh thanks
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Dayton, United States
Nice!
Today, I asked my husband to tell me something nice about myself. He thought for a few moments, then said, "Uh, you shit quietly." FML
Top comments
flufee2 27
What more could a guy ask for?!
Liamj774 36
Well that's because girls don't poop. Duh
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Comments (109)
flufee2 27
What more could a guy ask for?!
Onyxdragon 9
you should have it put on your headstone
jerryj 27
Also ******** without stinking up the place. Well, that concludes my wish list.
martin8337 36
Farting flowers.
flufee2 27
Ok... I guess there is a lot more a guy can ask for hahah
JMichael 26
He's so romantic :')
cryssycakesx3 23
"here lies Lisa, the quietest shitter we knew"
cryssycakesx3 23
"she was number one at number two"
incoherentrmblr 22
Women are like ninjas when they fart or sh**. No one knows it ever happened...
birdybirdchirp 18
#36 watch the "change up" see if you don't change your mind
Ichiya 29
Probably the best compliment you could ask for. I find it awkward as hell setting in another room and hearing someone grunt out a huge shit. But seriously just be glad he is with you and dont question it too much he may realize you aren't for him and leave.
MrsDruidess 23
. . he could ask for someone that doesn't shit in front of him. My husband and I, 17 years together and never once shit in front of each other. They say to leave somethings a mystery, ******** is on top of the list.
Ichiya 29
73, What if you get bored in there by yourself? I like to throw parties in the bathroom when i go. Just don't serve any food ( sanitation issues) and you will be fine.
Yeshua_fml 19
"Her number two was as quiet as this grave."
j_cat187 20
here lies Lisa, the "super duper pooper"
Liamj774 36
Well that's because girls don't poop. Duh
TrippingOnAcid 29
We're phantom shitters
Hopein2025 14
Hes a keeper
cole_tyler42 21
If he's able to appreciate your silent poops, then you have a perfect man.
Soviet_American 29
At least he didn't say,"Your hair looks small."
Way2Fast8 20
^ what're you saying?
Ichiya 29
56, Im relatively sure women don't feel the same way about their hair as guys do about their dicks.
Soviet_American 29
It's from always sunny in Philadelphia
Soviet_American 29
And yeah 81, you'd know better than any other guy. I'm guessing you get told you have a small dick quite frequently.
tournamentdecide 33
No need to be rude.
Ichiya 29
I get bigger when I smell the perfume of a beautiful woman.
BestNameEver12 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Looks like you guys have a great relationship... *sarcasm* FYL op
cryssycakesx3 23
to be able to joke around and poke fun at each other? it absolutely sounds like a good one.
JMichael 26
^ she gets it
citygirl28 11
Erm... since this got posted on FML we can definitely conclude the OP doesn't "get it" ...therefore yes maybe bad relationship. Personally I like that kind of banter.
Durantye 8
Since when is every FML always serious? The great majority of FMLs are actually just funny moments shared.
MattThePimp 10
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Sucks to suck.
mz135 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Well that's shitty
lord_meloetta 20
Bad pun
JBChristian 47
No, it's a well worn out pun.
GEBEH 14
The intelligence required to make that pun is as low as it is boring, I dare to say it was never funny. @51
Ichiya 29
I would dare to say that even now under the right circumstances it would still be funny. (*ﾟ∀ﾟ)つ＝lニニフ(prepares for the down votes)
brookenicolee29 27
That's a talent.
Sierra7211 17
Sound is the sense I would be least concerned about in terms of taking a shit. Smell would be the number one
cocainewhore 30
Or could be number two..
whys0serious 12
@#8: Seriously? The least one? What about taste? ;)
JBChristian 47
#33, you're making us all sick, particularly those of us having our evening snack.
The_Voytek_Bear 14
you can mask the smell with some air spray...
WCARlover 35
That's a great quality and you should be proud of yourself
CallMeWindSock 24
Well come on, that's something.
The_Voytek_Bear 14
that's a virtue in some apartments...