Today, I was riding the subway when a beautiful topless girl walked into my car and sat directly in front of me. Then, the train stopped abruptly and I banged my head. The girl was gone and I realized it had all been a dream. Then I realized I was supposed to get off 17 stops ago. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having a dream that I was climbing out of a well. While almost out, I felt someone grab my knee; I screamed loud in terror. When I opened my eyes, nearly 25 people were staring at me. The lady across from me apologized for hitting me with her bag. I was on the C-train. FML
Today, I took a train to visit a friend and fell asleep for what felt like ten minutes. I woke up at the final stop with the carriage empty. The doors opened, I stepped onto the platform, and immediately realized I had no idea where I was or how I'd got there. FML
Today, while on the train to university, I realized it was my stop and quickly stood up to get off. Or I would have, if my leg hadn't gone to sleep and caused me to fall, landing face first into the crotch of the old guy in front of me. FML
Today, I was on the subway when I felt like I was going to faint. I got off the train at the next stop, walked to a bench, but fell over and passed out. When I woke up, I looked around at at least 25 people, who had stepped around me, passed out, in the middle of the platform. FML
Today, I was riding the train and fell asleep. A friend of mine got on a few stops later, and to be funny, shouted 'BOO!'. I woke up and was so startled I peed myself. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the train after a long day at work. I woke up when someone gently tapped my shoulder. I opened my eyes to see people smiling at me. I'd been snoring so loud that the conductor had said, “Please wake Sleeping Beauty up, this is the last stop.” I had drooled on my tie and missed my actual stop by an hour. FML
Today, I was on train when an attractive girl got on. There were no free seats and seeing as how my stop was next, I gave her mine. As soon as I did, the train came to an immediate halt, due to "brake problems". I spent the next 40 minutes standing up. FML
Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a cute girl I didn't know. She fell asleep on my lap by accident and I just let her for the whole train ride. This is the closest I've ever been with a woman. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
SpencerDee 0
Wow. Just wow.
RecklessJellyBea 7
I'm just gonna assume you were high on something..
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (213)
sourgirl101 29
Has anyone seen the movie "Risky Business" with Tom Cruz? That subway scene was so Hot!!!
rwctkd95 0
33 nuffield wrong with small **** as long u have an ass it's all good
remy3106 10
i have a nice looking ass and a c cup soo yea my bf likes to smack my ass
Spastastic 6
And we need to know this...why?
remy3106 10
was I talkin to u? no! this was an A and B conversation so C ur way out of it. k?
illmatic2 16
It's a public website, anyone can post on it. And spastastic is right. Nobody wanted to know.
remy3106 10
k well it's a free country and felt I needed to share it
illmatic2 16
Lol that's ok. You can post whatever you want. But don't be suprised if people get pissed.
ohthebloodygore 16
107 - Isn't that America's motto 'It's a free country!' If so, I'm not in America. No one needs to know that your boyfriend likes slapping your arse (taken that you're not lying)
the_flirtt 0
lol 115
Edgar210 0
actually i think the web is free to...
Anaxes 5
The internet can't be free since there are no leaders of the internet to make rules.
SeanFredrick 3
115 "it's a free country" is the motto of any free country if you ask me lol. Maybe one day people will be able to say "it's a free world" but then the aliens will get pissed. But just cuz you have a working mouth/brain/keyboard, doesn't mean you should go around sayin whatever ya want.
SeanFredrick 3
The internets not a free thing but there are free websites. Like if I say somethin here they can moderate my comment. but obummer goanna take over do intranet dontcha know?
kroms001_fml 0
OP has wet dreams on subways... thus he banged his head... duh dum dum... tsss. yeah... fail.
rwctkd95 0
nuffin*
sallen0046 4
So you fell asleep on public transportation. Hundreds of people do this every day. If there's one going that way, there's another going back. Catch it and move on with your day.
XoXoSLY 0
21 I was thinking the same thing lol and I wonder if he's a talker I talk in my dreams...or mumble when I have hot sexy dreams lol
DANNYYH 0
#1 - That's what I thought when I saw your picture!
Flipflops4ever 0
YDI for dreaming she was only topless. I wd have dreamed she was completely naked (OK, wearing only sexy strappy sandals)
hate_spoons 0
loser
ki821 2
inception lol
illmatic2 16
Awesome movie.
Raleigh_bruh 7
Seriously, that was the best movie I've seen so far this year.
Spastastic 6
I actually had a three-layer dream sometime after I saw that movie... it wasn't directly inspired by it in any way, but it was still weird, and kind of cool.