Today, and for the last few months, I finally have enough money to be able to move into my own place. I can finally have girls over. I am also at the age of 26, where most girls stop wanting to go over to a guy's house. I wish I was 18 again, when independence is seen as new and sexy. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my last grown child moved out and into their own place. As I stood in my house, which was finally empty and quiet for the first time in 37 years, all I could think was, "THANK GOD THOSE IRRITATING SODS ARE GONE, I HAVE MY LIFE BACK, BUT DAMN IT, I’M TOO OLD TO HAVE REAL FUN ANYMORE." FML
Today, my boyfriend said that we can "maybe have sleepovers" at his house when he FINALLY moves out. He's 24, and we've been dating for 6 years. FML
Today, at age eighteen, I finished moving out of my parents' house and into my own. The only person to even remotely give a shit was my sister, and that was only because I was taking the cat with me. FML
Today, I'm at the age where I'm supposed to be having the time of my life. I'm short and look so young that I get asked if I'm still in high school. Every girl I've ever known looks at me like a "little brother". The only girls who have shown interest are still too young to vote. I'm missing out on my 20s. FML
Today, I decided it was time to start looking for my own place and finally gain my full independence. My mom agreed happily without hesitation, which was surprising, but not anywhere near as surprising as finding out I have one day to get my shit together and leave. FML
Today, at 30 years-old, I can finally move out. I could have chosen an apartment close to work, but instead I decided to stay close to where my mother lives. Since I told her, she's been complaining that I'm selfish and I'm creating a lot of problems for her by moving so far away. I'll be living half a block from her. FML
Today, despite the fact that I'm 20 years-old, my parents never allow me to go out and have fun with my friends, under the pretext that I'm a girl. I'm stuck at house all year long, I only go out to the college they forced me to study at, and they decide everything about me. I’m tired. FML
Today, I discovered that my new landlords must meet and approve guests of mine before they come over, and guests are not allowed when they aren't home or past 11pm. I'm 25 years old and just moved out of my parents' home to get away from my controlling mother. FML
Today, it's been almost 2 months since I moved into my new place, and it's the first time a girl has slept in my bed. I also slept on my new couch for the first time. FML
Today, I've reached the age as a sexless loser where my family no longer tells me to find a "single lady" but rather a "single mother". Thanks for reminding me everyone else had fun in their twenties. FML
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Top comments
sirrubberduckie 37
You can get girls to come back to your place far past the age of 26.
mike3775 39
You have your own place finally. Enjoy it, because you never know what will happen in the future. Think about it, no more having to get dressed just to sit in the living room to watch tv or walk into the kitchen to get a can of pop. I know a lot of people my age (I’m 49) who have their kids still living at home, and those kids all tell me that they wish they could afford to live on their own, but can’t without roommates.
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Comments (3)
mike3775 39
You have your own place finally. Enjoy it, because you never know what will happen in the future. Think about it, no more having to get dressed just to sit in the living room to watch tv or walk into the kitchen to get a can of pop. I know a lot of people my age (I’m 49) who have their kids still living at home, and those kids all tell me that they wish they could afford to live on their own, but can’t without roommates.
Wadlaen 24
If it's of any comfort, I'm 35 and have been single for 12 and a half years, and I've had my own place for the last 11 years, and I also long back to what I now regard as my prime time so far in life, when I was 20.
sirrubberduckie 37
You can get girls to come back to your place far past the age of 26.