Today, my dad and a construction worker were having a long talk. I heard the door slam, and assumed that this worker had left. So I yelled out, "Hey dad what were you talking about? Did you talk slowly so the idiot could understand?" Turns out my dad was the one who had walked out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad's boss called our house and I answered. He said, "Is your dad home?" I replied, "I'll go check." I put the phone on mute and asked my dad if he wanted to talk to his boss. My dad says, "Does that asshole not have a life?" Turns out the phone wasn't on mute, it was on speaker. FML
Today, I got back home from work and casually asked my dad, "What's up?" He casually replied, "Wishing I'd had a son instead." and stared glassy-eyed at me until I left the room. FML
Today, my dad walked in on me using the bathroom. After rushing out, he yelled at me through the door for not locking it. He made up the "no locking the doors inside the house" rule. FML
Today, I was sitting in my room when my dad walked in to talk. He said I'm not the son he'd hoped for, and that he'd been let down as a father. He said I should change the way I am so that he could love me more. It was the longest conversation I've had with my dad in years. FML
Today, I was fixing something for a guy at a steel manufacturing company. His employees told me that their boss can't hear properly, so I'd have to be loud when talking to him. When I'd finished, he asked me if I normally talked like that, or if there was something wrong with me. FML
Today, I came home at noon from a long night out. I was surprised to see a woman I didn't recognize standing in my living room in a brown dress and heels. As I walked up to the door and knocked to be let in, the woman whipped around and I figured out who it was. My dad. FML
Today, I was talking to one of my supervisors at my new job. He asked if I knew a professor at the school I recently graduated from, and I decided to babble on about how shitty of a professor he was and how much I loathed his class. He then looked at me and said, "That's my dad." FML
Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML
Today, my neighbor heard me watching a YouTube tutorial for how to do a simple fix on my car engine and he half jokingly asked why my dad didn’t teach me anything growing up. My dad was just inside the front door and heard him say it. They ended up fighting in the street. FML
Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML
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Top comments
Seegtease 0
That's why you don't call random people an idiot, idiot.
Area_fml 0
You really deserved it. What do you gain in assuming that construction workers are stupid?
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Comments (86)
nick333 0
You totally deserved that maybe you should think before you talk considering the fact that your dad was the one to walk out
lulzx 0
Chrisham, I'm with you
fmlyoumeanie 0
I hope she is sudical'
she_bangs 0
#s 8 and 21 dude, you're a bitch and the bigger idiot. you life will be ****** someday, alright.
Brittface 6
YDI you ******* dumbass. My dad and brother own a construction company and they work harder than u ever will. Their way smarter than your dumbass too.
p8ntbal1er 3
when you assume you make an ass out of you and me! lol
tinydancer_233_fml 0
AHAHAHA. Totally a bitch thing to say if its a generalization about construction workers... But the best part is the comments the OP left defending herself... but trying to sound like shes not the OP. just look at #s 26, 40, and 48... ******* lame
jim69_fml 0
"Today I beat down some **** kid for calling me an idiot, now im doing five to ten for aggrevated assault. FML."
sublime420 11
Remember kids, stay in school, or else you'll end up working construction and end up defending your horrible life decision on FML.
felton 0
YDI for being a fat spoiled bitch, Peter.