Today, I was reading one of the numerous Thomas the Tank Engine books to my 3-year-old, train obsessed, nanny kid. They needed tinder to relight Thomas's firebox. I laughed when reading this and told him, "I have Tinder too!" He's convinced I'm a train. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, in a train, I did the old "I've got your nose" trick for a kid. He got off at the next stop, then waved something at me from the platform, then yelled, "I've got your keys!" FML
Today, I was on a business trip with a coworker. We had to wait for the train, so I decided to browse a store in the train station while he waited outside. I then got a message on my phone, from my co-worker saying, "You are somewhere on this train, right?" FML
Today, I was matched with my boss on Tinder. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the train, totally wiped out after last night's party, which involved lots of booze and spicy Indian food. I wake up and notice a small boy staring at me, so I smiled at him. He turned to his father and said, "Daddy, the farting man has just woken up." FML
Today, while reading "1984" on the train, a cute guy around my age and I got into a great a discussion about the book. Just when I thought he might ask for my number, he got up, patted me on the head and said it's so nice that kids my age still took interest in real literature. I'm 25. FML
Today, I logged onto Tinder to see if I had any messages. I had one: "Get off Tinder." FML
Today, I was working as a ticket inspector on a train. A suspiciously-acting thirty something guy got on board with two huge bags. Worried, I kept an eye on him. I wasn't disappointed when he got 5 furry toys out of his bags and started to have a conversation with them. FML
Today, I took a night train for the first time. I woke up at 4 am to the beeping of smoke alarms and thick white smoke everywhere. The train had caught fire. FML
Today, to help my fellow trainees, I made a very long post in the training Teams chat detailing every detail that tripped me up recently. One responded, "Sir this is a Wendy's" and they all bust up laughing. FML
Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML
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Top comments
pjsr 33
“Daddy, daddy, the nanny has a tinder! You want to play train with her?” This will make a great start to a **** plot; you better get your caboose warmed up.
ViviMage 40
Chugga chugga choo choo!!
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Comments (10)
bloopaloop 27
Well, you are...
ViviMage 40
Chugga chugga choo choo!!
WistayShlaio82 13
Sadly, most people don’t know why tinder (the app) is called tinder. Poor city slickers.
bloopaloop 27
I’m surprised you even know what the app is.
pjsr 33
“Daddy, daddy, the nanny has a tinder! You want to play train with her?” This will make a great start to a **** plot; you better get your caboose warmed up.
Tiffani Carter 6
Yea...maybe a little inappropriate?
slowhandjp 18
The definition of Tinder is that dry material that burns easily and can be used for lighting fires.
Zak Greenwell 2
and that's the only tinder I'll ever play with again.