Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my crazed and very hormonal pregnant mother told me that I should get pregnant too, so that we can be "preggo buddies." I'm 15. FML
Today, I’m on my fifth miscarriage in nine years so we’ve had to decide to stop trying. Ever since we stopped, my mother in law is blaming me for giving her no grand-babies and uses every opportunity to try convince my husband to divorce me and marry a real, “fertile” woman. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she had fantasies about throwing him out a window when he was a baby because she was so depressed and couldn't handle the stress. The worst part is he wants to get married. She'd be my mother-in-law. FML
Today, my mom has been aggressively trying to get me to marry one of her coworkers, who is around my age. Apparently she loves her like the daughter she always wanted, and since it would be silly to adopt her; she is determined she will be her daughter-in-law instead, whether I like it or not. FML
Today, despite 18 years of marriage and two kids together, my father-in-law still insists my wife will one day grow up, realise I was the result of some rebellious phase she’s going through, divorce me and marry a decent boy from her hometown. FML
Today, I had a double wedding with my sister. My mother, being as encouraging as she always is, told us that statistics say one of our marriages will end in divorce. She then explained she thinks it'll be mine because I'm "a self-absorbed bitch." FML
Today, I happily announced that I'm getting married. My dad immediately shot back, "And I'm getting E.D., who gives a damn?" Just when I thought he was joking, he muttered that "the bitch" will take everything in our divorce. Moment ruined. FML
Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML
Today, my twice-divorced boomer mother made another passive-aggressive remark about my partner and I not being married, despite our 13-year relationship. What is this, 1950? We don't care about marriage, deal with it. FML
Today, my mom bitched me out for still being single at age 19, and still not having started a family. She considers this "immoral," yet showed nothing but praise for my sister, who's pregnant at 15 and doesn't know which of three guys is the father. FML
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Top comments
needleinmypants_fml 3
they just want granchildren before they die. FYL
Asario 0
she just wants you to supply her with more food. didnt you realize all the neighbors newborns dissapeared?
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Comments (102)
jmac317 0
sorry but haha wttfff
MaximilianMarche 0
best parents ever. sucks for u op
fatfatgoeshome 8
Tell her you're infertile. That should get her to shut up.
needleinmypants_fml 3
they just want granchildren before they die. FYL
iSitt 0
they want you to go through what they went through with you Also, a husband will agree with his wife if he knows what's good for him.
zivlaks 0
if he's a pussy.
macskapingvin 0
They don't have some legal right to be given grandchildren.
zacharytk72 5
:p fyl
FYLminerocks 7
Why? This is my gameplan.
bman134 0
I volunteer to sleep with you
lulzaroonie 0
I volunteer you to not offer your sexual services to married anonymous women over the Internet :D
Asario 0
she just wants you to supply her with more food. didnt you realize all the neighbors newborns dissapeared?
nobodyshearing 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
the concept of gold-digging... your mom's a bitch
Phustercluck 11
I don't think that's gold-digging. I'm pretty sure what she meant by "winner" was the one that got her pregnant, hence the "sleeping around till pregnant" part.
Igniculus 0
White gold.
djskidd 9
Liquid gold.
Alexweber929 14
Pearl jam
Zebidee 9
Ignore them, they're clearly mental.
Ninjafriends 1
Poppa loves him a ****.
Doortje 30
That's some pretty great advice. I wish I had a mother like that.
PrinceLaharl 0
Don't complain, rebel.* *Not valid for Prinnies and vassals.