Today, I accidentally showed up 5 minutes late for my shift. My boss mercifully declared that I would not be fired if I called my mother and told her I love her. My mom died 11 years ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I lost my job. Why? Because I'm taking care of my dying mother. My boss actually said, "Well, if she dies today, we can hold your job." FML
Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's been a death in the family, then abruptly hangs up. I speed home, to find my mother holding the tiny corpse of a fish that she got 2 weeks ago. I got fired for being late to work. FML
Today, on the first occasion I've seen my boss since her brief leave, I brought up how I got to hear all our customers' heartwarming plans for their moms on Mother's Day. Her mother just died. That's why she was on leave. FML
Today, I told my boss that my grandma died to get a day off work, but then my grandma showed up at the office looking for me because she wanted to go shopping. FML
Today, I took a day off from work for a doctor's appointment. It ended up taking a lot longer than I expected, because while I was on my way, my mom called to inform me that my great aunt passed away this morning. As a result, I showed up extremely late and was berated. And the worst part? It's my birthday. FML
Today, I accidentally called my boss "Mom." Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML
Today, my sister called me at work and told me our elderly mom had passed away. I dropped everything and rushed home, to find out she was fine, and that my sister was just pranking me. When I explained this to my boss, he accused me of lying to get out of work, and I was fired. FML
Today, at work, I was about to close a big sale, when a coworker rushed over and said there was a call for me in the office. He heavily implied my mom had died, and I rushed out. After I figured out there was no call and that my mom was fine, he'd already stolen my sale and the commission. FML
Today, I found out that my mom called my boss informing him that I am a little behind on some college projects. She felt he should know that she fears I might not be able to graduate on the planned date. My boss had already offered me a permanent job. I may not get that job now. FML
Today, I had organised to go for an all day fishing trip, but had forgotten to book a day off. I called my boss and told him that I had to stay with my mum in hospital after a car crash that she had last night. He called me a liar and fired me. Turns out my mum is having an affair with my boss. FML
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Top comments
Demon_of_Light 27
Just pick up the phone, pretend to dial any number, and start pouring your heart out to the dial tone.
Glowworm56 27
"Why did you bring a medium into the office?" "You said I had to contact my mother to tell her that I loved her. Mom died 11 years ago, come join the seance, Boss."
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Comments (17)
Mungolikecandy 19
Get an Oujia board.
mssileas 25
I think people are taking this way too seriously - I assume the boss was trying to make a joke ("I'm not going to do [add overreaction] if you do [small but nice and completely unrelated gesture]" bc obviously five minutes is not a big deal). In this case it just wasn't a good joke.
Charlie Given 28
Well hope ya didn't get canned and assuming your boss was kidding tell him very calmly you can't call her because she was abducted by aliens 👽
chioch 13
Did he know about your mother being dead when he said that? If he did then that's just horrible :/
xxWTFxx1981 23
I have a feeling your boss knew your mother was dead and that was his way of joking ... Not funny to you but I am sure he is chuckling to himself at this moment alone and petting his cat...lol