Today, I tried to win back my ex by fighting her current boyfriend. He kicked my ass. Now I have a broken jaw and a court date. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried to fight my girlfriend’s ex-boyfriend because she told me he used to beat her. Turns out, she was lying to “impress” me, and her ex has a black belt in taekwondo. I’m in excruciating pain right now. FML
Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend's ex punched me so hard in the face, I couldn't see straight. But I got up anyway. I lunged at him, and nailed him in the jaw. Turns out I'd in fact just knocked out my girlfriend the on-looker. FML
Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML
Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML
Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML
Today, I got a letter in the mail saying I'm being sued by the guy that broke into my house last week. When I walked in and saw him, I tackled him, punched him in the face a time or two, and restrained him with zip ties. I now have to pay for his broken nose and face charges of assault. FML
Today, my sister told me her ex-boyfriend abused her and I went to go confront him. Turns out, she lied because he dumped her after she cheated on him. I got my ass kicked. FML
Today, my new wife kept taunting and goading my ex into a fight. Now, instead of an amicable co-parenting situation, I have multiple court dates and a child support order. My wife won’t apologize and my ex doesn’t want her around the kids. FML
Today, my ex boyfriend got into a physical fight with the guy I've been casually seeing for 9 months. Afterwards, they had a beer, a long chat, and decided this was my fault and I wasn't worth the drama. FML
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Top comments
cuz803 46
You deserved it. No explanation necessary. I hope you lose the court battle too.
[Insert a name] 2
The 80s called. They want their movie plot back.
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Comments (7)
SamanthaThe1st 23
Scott Pilgrim is not reality
cuz803 46
You deserved it. No explanation necessary. I hope you lose the court battle too.
[Insert a name] 2
The 80s called. They want their movie plot back.
The_Real_Cvh 10
You’re an idiot. Guessing your outlook on life and how to pass through it, has something to do with why she is your ex.
Brightside86 31
FML like this make me wonder if OP is actually the new bf and framing this from the perspective of the old bf. I mean who would post an fml where they are the villain?
Jessica Carey 11
you'd be surprised. I read hundreds of FML's with cheaters posting about how they cheated, got caught, and now want sympathy... it's pathetic
Marcella1016 32
At least you got a date out of it?
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Even if you had successfully kicked his ass, 1. She still wouldn't take you back, and 2. You'd still have a court date.