Benefits
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Today, I overheard my mother and sister talking so I stopped to eavesdrop. I recently enlisted in the Marines, and they were talking about what they would do with the money if I died. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard my mother-in-law and sister-in-law over the baby monitor. They were talking about how much better off my daughter would be if I were to die. FML
Today, I asked my parents to sign for me to enlist in the military. They asked me how much money the government gives them if I die. FML
Today, I told my parents I was thinking about joining the army. They looked at each other and laughed for about 10 minutes straight. I wasn't joking. FML
Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML
Today, while chatting with my in-laws, I told them about my upcoming spinal surgery. Soon after, when I went to get us some drinks, I overheard them murmuring about how many surgeries I've already had, how I'm a drain on the healthcare system, and how I should ideally just die. FML
Today, I listened to a voicemail from my mom about how she misses me and can't wait to see me when I get back from vacation. Thinking she hung up, my mother then had a conversation with my aunt about how quiet the house is without me and how she'd be blessed if I didn't come home. FML
Today, I called my mother to tell her that I got engaged. In the 15 minute conversation that followed, 13 were spent listening to how this is going to affect her. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend talking to his mom about me. It sounded like they were planning something for me, like a marriage. They were planning how to break up with me. FML
Today, at the airport, my mom began talking about how useless the war in Iraq was, and how dumb the soldiers that serve there were for enlisting during the war. The soldier at the vending machine near us caught my eye. I mouthed, "Sorry" and he mouthed, slowly, "You fuckin' better be." FML
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Top comments
laestrellita 0
Leave them NOTHING!
mattypants 0
that is so messed up...and someone YDI this... I feel for ya
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Comments (356)
Mortal_Light 0
How is this an FML? You are going into a dangerous profession in which you just may die. You actually should talk to your family about what should happen in the event that you die.
sublime87 0
Wow... that blows. Regardless, thanks for serving our country! I'm glad you chose the Marines, at least twelve of my relatives are/were Marines.. they're the best! Good luck with your enlistment and be safe! Ooorah!
smiley_chik17 0
aww im sorry man :(
taosis 0
The same thing happend to me cept with my daughter
najma95 0
thats soooo sad :'( btw i accidently pressed you deserved it....sry
rukusrazor 0
Just change your will. Under their names have a letter given to them. In the letter, tell them to go **** themselves.
jay_T09 0
awww man that sucks try to get to some high rank say a sergent or captain or something then give all the money and it will be alot more to a beetroot or something
latuka 0
Semper Fi dude. and for those saying everyone thinks about it.. I sure as hell don't. my cousins were talking to me about what they'll get when my grandparents die, i was like what the ****?! I've never thought about that, and I hope I don't. God damn thats just... horrible. id say like everyone else, give it to charity. If 100 g's is what it is (holy shit thats a lota dough) than ya, give it to charity, but a legitimate one. and NOT everyone thinks about that. seriously. cold hearted assholes. or you can leave it to your dad (if he's still around) but not to an animal cuz then its pretty much given to your sis and mom.
BaldOuting 0
people are so greedy and selfish.
Fitz831 0
Guys I want to clear something up, I posted this and they were mostly kidding and I posted it because it was funny. They both respect my decision and are very proud not selfish and evil lol i don't belive they were hoping for it lmao -Semper Fi
LevyLove 17
The OP's user name is "Fitz" and you are "Fitz831". So who the **** are you?? You must either be the mother or the sister. lol