Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at a restaurant and confidently ordered in what I thought was fluent French. The waiter stared at me for a second, then responded in perfect English, "Dude, this is an Italian restaurant." FML
Today, I was at a restaurant with some friends, trying to be cultured by ordering in French. I confidently said to the waiter, “Je voudrais le poulet, s'il vous plaît.” The waiter stared at me and said, “Sir, this is a Chinese restaurant.” FML
Today, I went to see the school counselor to schedule my classes for school. She asked me if I knew how to speak English. My parents are Chinese and I don't even know how to speak Chinese. I've lived in America my whole life. Plus, I even spoke to her in English to ask about classes. FML
Today, I was on a date in a fancy restaurant. I tried to show off my skills by ordering our meal in French, since some of the dishes had french-sounding names. The waiter replied in fluent French and I have no idea what he said. FML
Today, I was unable to communicate with a customer who only spoke French. As a result, my boss called me a "monolingual idiot." I speak Spanish, German, and Japanese. FML
Today, I went to a drive through with my housemate. She got our order wrong and angrily yelled at the teenager who handed us our food, making her cry. My housemate can't fully speak English because of a learning disability, and she refuses to admit it. FML
Today, I was asked to prove that I was Chinese by translating the phrase, "Ching chong ming chang ho". I'm not even Chinese. FML
Today, as a waitress at Denny's, I had a 25 top table. Only 3 of them spoke English. FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Apparently you can't understand English either. Did you have to use a translator for this FML?
SmokeyBear420 19
lol bad accent?
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Comments (84)
Xotoolyxo 16
Maybe she had a thick accent?
ZY1431 24
her look must of been wtf?!
Criticalvector 4
Chinese is not a language they mostly speak Mandarin in china
stargirl_95 24
If I remember correctly, Chinese is the written language and Mandarin is one of the spoken languages.
Shade1982 21
To be more precise: Chinese: group of related languages Written language: Hanzi Spoken languages: Mandarin, Cantonese, Taiwanese, etc...
Suaria 38
Chinese is the written language written in characters which are also split into two parts: traditional and simplified. Based upon the titles simplified has more simplified characters than traditional characters. Mandarin is the official language of the People's Republic of China or known as China. Everyone in China is able to speak Mandarin. Cantonese is derived from the anglicized version of Guangzhou known as Canton which is a city located in Southern China in the Guangdong province. Many Southern Chinese speak Cantonese as well as Mandarin. There are many different dialects of Chinese such as Mandarin, Shanghainese, Cantonese, Taiwanese, etc.
Yanqui_UXO 4
I am semi fluent in Chinese (Mandarin.) A helpful phrase is "Ting bu dong." It means "I don't understand." Another good phrase is "Wo shuo yingyu" for "I speak English"
RenGo_fml 5
Why the hell would you bother to tell a waitress you're chinese in the first place? I doubt she would really care.
Shade1982 21
It's actually quite logical. Op apparently thought the waitress was speaking 'chinese' (mandarin) to the op, because the waitress thought op would speak that too.
tvwrestler98 14
She's paisa. (jokes most Hispanics use)
Curlytwirly22 17
How did you understand her if you didn't understand her at first ?
Jamosoma 5
Happend to me once. Lucky my mate was there to save me
fantasyworld 39
Must be a pretty heavy accent.
Suaria 38
I'm not sure if you are not able to fit this into FML but you most likely know about the different dialects of Chinese. Chinese isn't just one language.