Today, my jeep wouldn't start so I opened the hood. I slammed my fingers in my jeep's hood. It latched shut. My hood release was inside the cab, and the jeep was in neutral and on an incline. It started to roll, towards a ditch about 5 yards away. I had to skin my own fingers to get them out. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I couldn't get my car hood to open to check the fluids. A few miles down the highway, though, it popped right open. FML
Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML
Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML
Today, after a snowstorm, I went to start my car early in the morning for work. The door was frozen solid, so I had to jimmy it open with a screwdriver. Then, as I started to drive off, my foot slipped off the clutch and the car stalled out. The battery was too weak to start it again. FML
Today, I had to jump into my car while it was still moving. Apparently, just because you put it in park and turn it off, doesn't mean it won't take off towards a ditch without warning. FML
Today, I was cleaning my car when I hit the automatic window button while I was vacuuming in between the door and the driver's seat, and got stuck halfway out, in full view of my neighbor. He had to come get me out, because I couldn't reach the button. FML
Today, I couldn't open my car door from the inside. I rang my father-in-law in a panic and he opened it from the outside for me. Then he asked why I just didn't roll down the window and do it myself. FML
Today, I rolled down the windows in my car. When I tried to roll up the passenger side window, it was stuck. Rain was coming so I freaked out and brought it to the dealership to get it fixed. The man pushed the child safety lock button and the entire garage erupted in laughter. FML
Today, I locked myself out of my truck for the first time. While trying to unlock it, it started to rain. After half an hour, I successfully unlocked the door and then drove over my bookbag, which I had placed underneath the truck to keep it out of the rain. FML
Today, I locked my car. I put the key in my bag when suddenly my car began to roll backwards. I tried to get the key out of my bag but couldn't find it, and with the other hand I tried to stop the car. The worst thing was that some dumbass was watching me and didn't help. FML
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Top comments
null_fml 11
I think your problem may have been slamming your fingers in the hood. That's not a very good strategy when it comes to fixing vehicles.
wearinsexypants 0
wow you're dumb. Its just good policy to never get out of your car unless you put the parking brake on and/or put the car in park. and it's really not that hard to avoid slamming your fingers.
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Comments (150)
xnj319 2
YDI for not using the e-brake.
webkinzfreak96 0
How did you write this I don't think typing and FML is the most important thing if your fingers are actually THAT hurt
1m_b0r3d 0
i believe that every person has two hands...and maybe just maybe....he only got one hand stuck -.-
ladysandy_fml 0
This is something I'd really like to see in the movie SAW.
dvd175 5
i was just thinking that
ikilledaman 9
Ha, same here. "Now Op, you have two minutes to get your fingers out of the hood, or the car will roll away with you. Spend your time wisely, or you will regret it. Want to play a game?"
yowzerz 5
Either this is fake or YDI for having your car in neutral when you got out to check under the hood. Who's retarded enough to not put the car in park while they're out of it? You, apparently. Way to go, idiot.
trujewfro 0
yes of course he deserved having to skin his fingers to escape falling into a pit with a jeep just because he forgot to put on the breaks when his jeep stopped working
skatagurl 0
what kind of douche uses the word fucktard?
null_fml 11
What kind of jackass uses the word douche?
DoomJeff91 2
What kinda dick-nozzle uses the word "jackass?"
ItsAllGoodPeeps 0
What kinda queer uses the word "dick nozzle"?
ohmygoodnex 0
I do, Dick-nozzle.
Cant_Touch_This_ 0
what kind of shitface uses the word "queer"?
oh_dee 0
wow, this was a waste of time. leaving your car in neutral on a hill. classic.
Nakedsquirrel 5
What kind of fucktard leaves a vehicle on an incline without the parking brake on?
antiflamer5 0
JEEPS 1, HUMANS 0
whiners 0
Another failure for Darwinism.
slash1396 0
darwinism at its finest dumbass
LyuboLove 0
saw VIII