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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Drugs

    By alrightsheryl - 28/03/2009 16:40 - United States

    Today, it's my 18th birthday. I called my parents and they told me that they found weed in the guest house, so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say, "Happy Birthday." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 70 642
    You deserved it 4 906
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    The nickname that sticks

    By ap84 - 27/02/2009 21:47 - United States

    Today, after soccer practice, I was walking to the car with my dad. My teammates waved and said "BYE POTHEAD!" They call me that because they think my head is shaped like a pot. Of course, my dad didn't believe me. I'm grounded now because I have an abnormally-shaped head. I've never smoked pot. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 83 887
    You deserved it 5 635
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    Rock n roll!

    By christous - 22/11/2008 04:42 - France

    Today, I was supposed to perform my first concert in front of a crowded audience. As we were about to go on stage, my band decided to roll a joint outside. The cops just happened to pass by, and now I'm on my own. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 31 581
    You deserved it 5 025
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    Miscellaneous Embarrassing Movies Work Facebook Neighbours Social Media Love Money First Dates Sextoys Intimacy Geek Technology Parents Kids Friends Awkward Dating Health Medication Poopoo peepee Stalker My ex Family Creepy Weird Sex AITA Drugs
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    Today, I walked through a car park and brutally bashed my head, leaving a tennis ball sized lump on my forehead on an overhead sign saying, "Max height 6"6'". I'm 6"4'. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 3 860
    You deserved it 458
    Today, while in my room on the computer, I had a sudden urge to pee. I got up to use the loo and started hearing some disturbing noises from inside. Apparently I was so quiet my parents thought I was gone and decided to have sex in the shower. It's been an hour and my bladder is about to burst. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 36 573
    You deserved it 3 272
    Today, I was demoted from my job because the security cameras caught me dancing in the elevator, and it was considered "inappropriate behavior." I was celebrating getting a promotion. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 713
    You deserved it 107
    Today, is the first weekend I have off this summer. Instead of letting me see my friends, my dad printed out a practice SAT exam. I've already taken the SAT. He just "doesn't want me to get rusty". FML
    I agree, your life sucks 36 957
    You deserved it 3 606
    Today, I've worked for the power company for six years. My wife and her family still don't understand that I don't control their power bills, I can't give them a discount, and I can't answer their questions since I don't work in Billing. Every month, it's the same tired arguments. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 528
    You deserved it 70
    Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!" in Michael Jackson's voice while having an orgasm. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 34 312
    You deserved it 6 461
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