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One track mind

By Anonymous - 06/07/2026 20:00 - India - New Delhi

Today, my boyfriend's been distant lately so I told him he was not like this when we first started talking. He replied that it's because he was horny at the time, so now I'm stuck with his nonchalant ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 110

Brain melting

By drunk n high - 17/07/2026 12:00 - United States - Reno

Today, while stumbling drunkenly down a trail, I saw a sign that said "Watch for Falling Rocks." I spent the next five minutes confused and wondering how I was supposed to know which rocks were planning to fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52

You deserved it 377

Blood drive

By Queasy Dave - 03/07/2026 09:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I tried donating blood for the first time because my company was hosting a blood drive. Right after telling everyone I wasn't afraid of needles, I fainted before they could even use one. I woke up surrounded by phlebotomists offering me juice while my coworkers whooped like I'd just scored a goal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 179

You deserved it 260

Cats are cool dudes

By Anonymous - 28/07/2026 09:00 - United States - Rialto

Today, someone (probably my ex) released a bunch of cats into my house. I’m pants-shittingly, deathly afraid of cats. Animal control can’t guarantee that they caught them all because they have no way of knowing how many were in there in the first place. I’m too terrified to be at home now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 110

Power steering

By Anonymous - 30/07/2026 03:00 - Germany

Today, helping my boyfriend move to his new apartment, I hurt my shoulder. While carrying heavy things? Nope. Those were fine. What did me in was driving the moving van, which required very active, hands-on steering at high speeds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21

You deserved it 15

Gloom and doom

By FTheWorld - 01/07/2026 20:00 - Germany

Today, there's a huge heat wave, all because corporations were reckless and accelerated climate change. Now, more people are buying more air conditioners, further worsening the climate crisis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 449

It's not a phase, Mom

By Anonymous - 03/07/2026 12:00 - United States - Covington

Today, my mom found my sketchbook full of realistic dicks. She woke me up to show me with concern, and the page she showed as an example was specifically someone getting a handjob. For context, I draw lewd stuff for the laughs, and being an artist just makes it not work out in my favor. She now thinks I am a perv. FML

I agree, your life sucks 130

You deserved it 298

Idiots, idiots everywhere

By Anonymous - 07/07/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, at work in the emergency department, we had several young people come in with heart palpitations. These idiots decided to mix pre-workout with Red Bull instead of water. I’m amazed none of them died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 63

Are you my new mommy?

By Anonymous - 10/07/2026 15:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of six years has a five year-old daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 495

You deserved it 79

Panic mode

By Dumb girl - 12/07/2026 09:00 - United States - New York

Today, I locked my keys in the house. I panicked so hard and immediately started kicking the door, desperate to get my keys. My boyfriend, who I forgot was staying over, woke up and opened the door right as I kicked it, and the door smashed into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65

You deserved it 474

This meeting could've been an e-mail

By Anonymous - 14/07/2026 03:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was bored in a meeting, so I absentmindedly started flipping my phone like a fidget spinner. I lost grip, spun it towards the ground, then watched it slide across the floor directly to my manager's feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62

You deserved it 469

Please stay!

By she CHEATED! she LIED! she's FULL OF SHIT! - 15/07/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend cried and begged me not to leave her, saying her "hickey" was a burn from a curling iron. That might be believable if it was one on her neck and not in four places on her tits and thighs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 483

You deserved it 51

Not a morning person

By Anna backwards is annA - 19/07/2026 12:00 - Germany - Saarbrücken

Today, I woke up early for work, then yanked my phone by the charger cord on my nightstand to look at it. I gravely underestimated the force by which I pulled the charger and the whiplash of my phone popped me square in the nose. Hard. I have a bruise now. I hope people don't think my boyfriend is a domestic abuser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 273

Cooked

By Anonymous - 23/07/2026 00:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my partner came home late so I preheated the oven for dinner. My partner got home an hour later, and we put things in the oven. We then go to cook the potatoes on our induction stove. Oh, the stove is off, the breaker must have tripped today. Oh, the oven is on the same fuse. Oh, the food is still frozen. It's 10pm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 260

You deserved it 174

Germs

By Anonymous - 24/07/2026 20:00 - United Kingdom - Addlestone

Today, I finally put away two weeks worth of clean laundry, only to get to the bottom of the pile and find mice droppings. I now have to wash my whole wardrobe, bed linen, and towels with disinfectant (On top of sanitising my furniture and floors). FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 136

Leaked

By ym - 26/07/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, at the ripe age of 29, I pooped my pants. It was a little diarrhea and I had expected it to be a fart, so I quickly had to grab my shorts, waddling to the bathroom, commando. FML

I agree, your life sucks 235

You deserved it 93

In for the long haul

By Anonymous - 01/07/2026 22:00 - Australia

Today, I'd booked the cheapest seat on a long flight and ended up between a couple who spent the entire trip arguing through me instead of talking to each other, even after I offered to switch seats. By the end of the flight I probably knew more about their marriage than some of their relatives do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 75

Brake check

By Suzie - 03/07/2026 15:00 - Australia

Today, I was taking my driving test and everything was going perfectly. As I pulled back into the testing center, I smiled because I knew I'd passed. Then I got out of the car without pulling the handbrake. The examiner had to jump back in and hit the brakes before it rolled into an actual parked car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 433

News to me

By Paul - 05/07/2026 09:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I finally mustered up the courage to ask someone out. She smiled, hugged me, and said, "That's so sweet. I'll have to ask my fiancé if he's OK with it." That was how I found out she was engaged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 115

GET OUT

By tired af - 08/07/2026 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I spent twenty minutes trying to shoo a bird out of my apartment. After finally getting it outside, I closed the window, turned around, and realized I'd locked myself out instead. The bird flew away. I didn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 129

You deserved it 257

Shoutout to the big JC

By "Bad" Uncle K - 12/07/2026 12:00 - Philippines - Makati City

Today, my sister, brother-in-law, and all his family cusses at me and has labeled me as a "bad influence" to my nephew. He is smart, good looking, and has A LOT of future opportunities in life. They found out I'm supporting his "worthless" and "penniless" career of choice. He's dead set on being a Roman Catholic priest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 313

You deserved it 158

Today's mystery item

By Curious George - 19/07/2026 15:00 - United States - Denver

Today, I found an old USB drive and spent an hour trying to open it because I was sure it had important files on it. It contained one blurry photo of my thumb and a Word doc titled “Do not open", which was actually blank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 251

Guess that's a "No thanks" then

By Anonymous - 21/07/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I tracked down my long-lost daughter after losing her to foster care 26 years ago when I was on drugs. I knocked on her door and introduced myself, going in for a hug. She maced me and physically kicked me back into the hall, threatening a restraining order if I ever spoke to her again, and slammed the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 879

I'm a mess

By Anonymous - 23/07/2026 03:00 - Australia

Today, I set practically ten alarms because I absolutely could not oversleep for an important appointment. I woke up two hours early, panicked that I'd missed it, and couldn't fall back asleep. I spent the entire appointment looking like I hadn't slept at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 295

You deserved it 108

Sentimental value

By Anonymous - 28/07/2026 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I found out that my ex gifted a special handcrafted necklace I made for him to his new girlfriend. She wears it on all her socials. FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 69

I tried

By Anonymous - 02/07/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, after spending two hours baking cookies for my niece's school's fundraiser, I packed them into a container and drove to the school. When I got there, the teacher looked confused and said the fundraiser was next Saturday. By the time the actual date arrived, every cookie had been eaten by my family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 146

You deserved it 307

Lost in music

By Anonymous - 05/07/2026 12:00 - France - Lille

Today, I wore noise-canceling headphones while cleaning my apartment. Apparently I'd been singing at the top of my lungs for nearly an hour, because my neighbor knocked on my door just to ask if everything was OK. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 356

I did everything right and…

By Anonymous - 09/07/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I found a wallet on the sidewalk and tracked down the owner through social media. They thanked me, met me to pick it up, opened it, and immediately asked where the $20 bill had gone. There had never been a $20 bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 56

Thank you, kind stranger

By naive - 10/07/2026 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I spent twenty minutes helping an elderly man figure out how to use the self-checkout. When we'd finished, he smiled, thanked me, then walked away… without paying for any of his groceries. The cashier assumed I was with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 360

You deserved it 80

Bon appétit !

By Anonymous - 14/07/2026 09:00 - United States - Santa Ana

Today, as I was running late for work, I asked my husband to pack me some hard boiled eggs for lunch. When I went on my lunch break, I went to crack my eggs only to discover they were completely raw. When confronted, my husband said, “Well you didn’t say I had to cook them first!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 96

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The Top

Today, I got fired via Facebook messenger in a chat that also included a coworker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 212

You deserved it 629

Today, I'm severely sunburned and can barely walk properly. My boyfriend keeps telling his friends that it's because of, "how hard he gave it to me last night." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 695

You deserved it 10 144

Today, my boyfriend's proposal speech somehow ended with him breaking up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 713

You deserved it 4 321

Today, I cut my balls while shaving. They wouldn't stop bleeding, so I had to go about my day wearing a maxi pad. My girlfriend won't stop congratulating me on growing into a beautiful young woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 633

You deserved it 1 821

Today, my mom screamed at me for being startled by her, calling my reaction “unnecessary and extremely rude.” When I tried to explain to her for the millionth time that I startle easily, and it’s involuntary, she told me to “make it voluntary, or else.” I fear what is to come. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 155

Today, I watched the love of my life look me straight in the eye and lie to me with well-practised ease about where she spent last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 534

You deserved it 524