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The all-time greatest FMLs

The customer is always right

By Anonymous - 05/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, a customer ordered the spicy shrimp ramen bowl. The menu says spicy, I warned her it was spicy, it’s in the fucking title SPICY SHRIMP RAMEN! Despite all of this, instead of ordering something different, the stupid fucking Karen sent her order back four times because it was too hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 54

Pests

By mom - 30/01/2024 20:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I had mice in the house and had to kill them with mousetraps. I pulled a trap out with a dead mouse and my four year-old son saw. Mice are his favorite animals, and now he won’t speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 234

In the Navy

By Anonymous - 12/02/2026 12:00

Today, while I was sleeping on the sofa, my sister yelled right in my ear, "Attention on deck !" I jumped up so fast because I thought a superior officer had just walked in that I tripped over my own feet and smashed into our mom's glass fronted display case full of porcelain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 84

Help needed!

By HUH? - 12/02/2026 15:00

Today, my wife snapped at me for never having sex with her. Any time I try, she tells me to stop, but apparently sometimes she wants me to ignore her pleas and keep going. Sometimes she actually wants me to stop, though, and she won't tell me how to differentiate the two. Help. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 96

Snaked

By Drained - 30/05/2025 00:00 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, my wife complained that the shower was draining slowly, so I took the drain cover off and snaked the drain. I pulled out a giant blob of reeking, stinking, rotten filth. My wife saw it and screamed. Now she insists she can still smell it on my hands and won't let me near her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 74

Time to get a lock

By Anonymous - 11/03/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, I learned it's not safe to take a bath if my aunt is staying over, because apparently she was never taught the "Knock before you enter" rule if the bathroom door is closed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 135

By Chatons - 05/12/2013 06:52 - Switzerland

Today, my kittens hunted and killed their first prey. My hamster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 75

Wait for me!

By Anonymous - 03/01/2021 01:58

Today, the parking shuttle for work pulled away right as I was walking up to it. I was late to work. For the second day in a row. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 738

Spice

By Anonymous - 07/04/2021 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 999

A+ for effort…

By I tried - 03/10/2025 22:00

Today, I lit candles and scattered rose petals on the floor and on the furniture to surprise my girlfriend. When she came in, she sneezed uncontrollably because apparently she’s extremely allergic to these particular roses. The night ended with me driving her to the ER instead of dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 107

I'm in Hell

By Anonymous - 03/05/2026 22:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I sit here struggling with such horrendous pain, which I've been dealing with now for the last six months or so, crying and contemplating whether I want to be around or not, as I'm so fed up with the pain. It's affecting me physically and mentally, I just don't know what to do anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 74

The strangeness of strangers

By Anonymous - 10/03/2025 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I felt ready to trust men again so I had a little foray into Tinder, just to see what’s out there for a divorcee in her 40s. The very first guy I matched with catfished me with his photo and wanted to buy my dirty undies and socks, in a ziplock bag “to preserve the aroma.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 122

Cool new look

By Anonymous - 10/12/2023 09:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I decided to try a new hair removal cream. Turns out, I'm allergic to it. My face now looks like a tomato with eyebrows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 150

Nope, not even once

By Anonymous - 11/09/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom

Today, at a customer's house, I was asked to carry her delivery of six pieces of heavy furniture up to her office. Normally, not a problem, but this insane woman had Witches' Stairs (Google them), which were was an accident begging to happen. She told my boss I was unhelpful, uncooperative, and rude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 96

How is this my fault?

By Anonymous - 08/12/2024 14:00 - United States - Orlando

Today, we were in line to ride Cosmic Rewind when it broke down. My mom and sister then got mad at me saying that I "wasted everyone’s time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 91

Signals

By UnfortunatelyNotPsychic - 20/12/2023 20:00 - United Kingdom - Darlington

Today, my partner said I was ''foreign'' to him, like ''I didn't know him at all'' when I failed to correctly pick up on a highly specific thought he had about me, via text message. Sorry for not being psychic, babe? FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 125

Happy family

By Anonymous - 17/03/2026 09:00

Today, I asked my wife why she’s been in such a sour mood lately. She released a barrage of complaints, but the biggest one being that she’s bored. In fact, she described me and our kids as the most excruciatingly boring people she’s ever met, all because we’re introverts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 115

Hissy fit

By Anonymous - 13/10/2025 12:00

Today, I was watching our regular show on Netflix with my boyfriend. I made a remark about one of the male leads having nice abs. My boyfriend is so pathetically insecure that he threw a fit and is refusing to finish the show since he claims I find the actor more attractive than him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 162

So long…

By Anonymous - 11/05/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I'm depressed because my long-time dentist, who I've had for nearly two decades, is retiring and I'm having my last appointment with him. It's also depressing that one of my only meaningful relationships is with my dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 152

By Gandhi - 25/04/2016 15:32 - India

Today, while my eyes are closed in the shower, I asked my son to hand me the shampoo. He gave me his mother’s hair removal cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 73

So romantic

By Anonymous - 16/05/2022 10:00

Today, if I want to be sexually attracted to my wife, I need to be very drunk, but if I'm very drunk there's about a 2/3 chance I'll have whisky dick. Before you ask, we've been married over 40 years, so there's no point in divorcing, we've been together too long, so who else would want to shag us except each other? FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 1 414

Needy

By Arnold - 21/10/2025 09:00

Today, my wife asked why I was so grumpy. I admitted that I was horny and sexually frustrated. She went on an hour long tirade about how I "shouldn't need sex to not be a jerk" and how I need to handle my own needs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 222

Strained out

By Anonymous - 05/03/2026 22:00

Today, my parents happily announced that they're getting remarried. They divorced because of the strain brought on by me nearly dying in a car accident. So basically they put us through all that shit, including me blaming myself for everything, for nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 72

Sleep Schedule Struggles

By FML Videos - 23/08/2018 19:30

The end of summer vacation means no more 4am bedtime!

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 119

Hickory wind

By Sweet Home Alabama - 20/03/2026 22:00

Today, my friends' attempts to get me a girlfriend, even though I'm OK with being single, have gone too far. A "new girl" recently showed up and they're dead set on setting us up because, "You two get along so well!" Every time I try to explain to them that she's my cousin, they think I'm lying. I'm not lying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 58

We don't trust you

By Anonymous - 03/08/2026 03:00 - United States - Irving

Today, my dad and stepmom insisted on having a babysitter stay with me while they go off on their 3-week vacation. I'm 22 and work full-time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 78

Loose cannon

By Anonymous - 21/03/2026 09:00

Today, I found out that my workplace still won't fire my coworker who is extremely rude to customers. Last week, he called a black woman the n-word right to her face. All he did was just get yelled at and told to get back to work. No matter how many complaints, they simply won't fire him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 70

Rare moment of humanity

By Clerk - 15/01/2026 15:00

Today, a guy at work yelled at me for being incompetent when he got frustrated because I couldn't immediately solve his problem. After we got it worked out, he apologized for overreacting and said I didn't deserve his reaction. I'm so accustomed to being treated like dirt that I started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 96

Great presentation!

By Sarah - 08/04/2025 00:00 - Australia

Today, I wore a new pair of heels to an interview. Halfway through, as they were showing me around the production floor, one of my heels snapped. I was forced to finish the interview wobbling on one heel like a drunk flamingo. I wasn’t offered the job, but they did say, “You have great balance.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 107

What fresh hell is this?

By What - 27/06/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, after going to the doctor, thinking I was going to be diagnosed with hyperthyroidism, it turns out my thyroid is "perfectly normal." Apparently the strange feeling in my neck that oddly mimicked the disease is "an autism thing", even though I've never noticed it happen until now. I am so confused. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 126

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear "pop goes the weasel" outside my house. My boyfriend stops and excitedly says, "ICE CREAM MAN", flips me over, grabs his clothes, and runs out of my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 81

Today, I was at the airport, on my way to see my dad for the first time since I was four years-old. Whilst I was waiting for my dad to find me, a strange man started flirting with me. Irritated, I told him I was waiting for my dad to get me, and to fuck off. The strange man was my father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 229

You deserved it 4 218

Random

Today, I finally got a package for some pieces that my model kit was missing after I had contacted customer services about the problem. The package was still missing a piece. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 078

You deserved it 645

Today, I discovered an effective form of body hair removal. I discovered that my three-year-old daughter is strong enough to pull off a major clump of my leg hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 649

You deserved it 1 249

Today, I had to deal with a snobby rich woman who asked me to cure her daughter's "unhealthy obsession" with playing outside instead of watching TV with the rest of the family. She called me a liar when I said playing outside is a normal thing for a 6 year-old child to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 186

You deserved it 949

Today, I reminded my husband that I was on my period, so he wouldn't try to fool around with me. A few hours later, his goldfish-like memory kicked in and he stuck his hand down my pants while we were going to bed. I was wearing a maxi pad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 836

You deserved it 5 842

Today, I went to do my laundry. Having no laundry bag, I put clothes in a suitcase and headed to the basement. When my roommate saw me, she burst into tears with happiness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 973

You deserved it 5 721

Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to take a pair of scissors to all my bras. My mom can't take me shopping for another three days and I have no one to borrow a bra from. I have school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 280

You deserved it 4 393