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Halloween is near

By Party's Over - 28/10/2025 20:00

Today, like we do every year, we watched a documentary show's annual Halloween special. Everything is set: food, location, the works. Our so-called uber-religious mom, who always opposes to this because it's "inauspicious", right before it started, hijacked the TV to stay in one channel, The 24-Hour Bible Channel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 88

Scary stuff

By Sam - 01/11/2025 09:00

Today, on Halloween, I received an award for my progress at my drug rehab clinic. I told my mom we should celebrate by going out to eat. Her response? "I got you a turkey sandwich from the hospital cafeteria." Thanks Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 354

You deserved it 138

Evil, prank, or just dumb?

By Anonymous - 03/11/2025 00:00

Today, for some reason, my amazing dad told me to slide down towards a pole on a car tire while tobogganing down a hill and I hit the tire, consequently getting hurt in the head. I love my dad but something must've gone wrong that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 288

Kids pick up stuff you say

By Embarrassed mom - 06/11/2025 15:00

Today, after a long, tedious and annoying wait in line at the supermarket, my 5-year-old told the cashier, “Mommy says you’re too slow.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 386

Buddy boy

By Anonymous - 08/11/2025 09:00

Today, at the park, a toddler ran up to me yelling “Daddy!” and hugged my legs. Trying to be nice, I patted his head and said, “Hey, buddy, I’m not your dad.” His actual dad appeared behind me, wearing the same shirt, same haircut, and looked at me like I’d just tried to kidnap his child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 51

Inside job

By Anonymous - 15/11/2025 12:00

Today, my coworkers were always too nice, and I thought it was suspicious. I asked my boss why my shifts were vanishing and she finally that admitted everyone thinks I’m “too slow.” So the niceness was fake and I was the inside joke the whole time. I quit on the spot… then remembered I’m a broke uni student with no backup plan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 396

Small talk is hell

By Anonymous - 22/11/2025 15:00

Today, I got stuck making small talk with a neighbor I barely know. In a panic, I said “Have a good night!” even though it was 10 a.m. She corrected me with, “Morning,” and my brain responded, “Happy… time?” I swear she slowly backed away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 253

You deserved it 182

Nice try, buster

By Anonymous - 27/11/2025 22:00

Today, my four year-old wants to throw out all his toys and get new ones for Christmas. His reasoning is that if he throws them away, there will be space for all new toys. He doesn't understand sustainability or environment. He's been explaining this calmly over and over again for two hours now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 366

Awkward

By Anonymous - 01/12/2025 12:00

Today, I told my boyfriend about something that had happened “after you came to our school." He told me he'd gone to our school for every grade. I'd just never noticed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 441

Hogwatch

By Anonymous - 05/12/2025 00:00

Today, I was once again berated by an idiotic parent. I’ve been called a filthy liberal, a groomer, and had my job threatened several times. All of this because I was teaching second graders about pronouns. You know, the part of English grammar that replaces a noun. Nothing political at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 534

You deserved it 119

Thanks, asshole

By God dammit - 06/12/2025 20:00

Today, the new guy at my workplace was on his phone so much that he has become solely responsible for a new rule: no one is allowed to have their phone on their person, except on breaks. So, I guess that if my severely disabled mom ever has an emergency at home, she'll have to fend for herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 75

Simply having a wonderful Xmas time!

By Anonymous - 10/12/2025 09:00

Today, I came home and told my husband that I got my own Christmas present so he would have something to give me at the family gathering. He asked me if it was wrapped. I said it was. He said, "Nice." No follow up questions at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 131

Yada yada yada

By Anonymous - 13/12/2025 22:00

Today, I tried to look productive in a meeting by nodding along, only to realize too late that I was actually nodding off. When my head dropped forward, it made a loud thud on my desk, and everyone stopped talking at once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 378

Test run

By Naughty! - 17/12/2025 12:00

Today, I took my new dog to a hotel lobby to test his manners before travel. He sniffed politely, then sneezed a dramatic snot-spritz all over a wedding guest’s dress. She froze, then laughed nervously while I offered napkins like a panicked but well-meaning emergency worker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 435

Nice to see so much of you

By Anonymous - 20/12/2025 22:00

Today, I had to prepare a good setup to video chat with my friend in Hong Kong. I was so focused on the right lighting and angle, I didn't pay attention to what was in the background… Until my friend started giggling because she saw my tighty whitey-clad ass in the reflection of the mirror behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 468

The more you know

By pedant - 24/12/2025 12:00

Today, I confidently corrected someone’s pronunciation of a word during a conversation. They pulled out their phone, looked it up, and turned the screen towards me. I was wrong. They said, “No worries!” while absolutely worrying me forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72

You deserved it 582

Stay out of it

By Muddy - 28/12/2025 00:00

Today, my disgusting coworker made a comment about "women versus accountability" and I couldn't even yell at him for being a sexist scumbucket, because my wife threw coffee at me yesterday for pointing out that she'd left the chips open and they went stale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 183

You deserved it 364

Let me think about it

By Girl - 31/12/2025 15:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed. He said, "Will you be the Eva Braun to my Adolf Hitler?" I struggle to think of a worse way to propose to a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 529

You deserved it 107

D'oh!

By Anonymous - 02/01/2026 09:00

Today, I checked the mail. It was New Year's Day. I didn't realize my mistake until someone else pointed it out and I let out a "D'oh!" like Homer Simpson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 124

You deserved it 269

Freakout

By Anonymous - 05/01/2026 22:00

Today, my daughter learned a new phrase: “Sleep Paralysis Demon.” It was exactly as bad as you’re imagining, she sobbed for almost 15 minutes, and that's a very long time when the tears and screaming are constant and without a pause. The neighbours knocked on the door because they were worried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 353

You deserved it 71

Klutz

By Erin Duncan - 09/01/2026 12:00

Today, my klutziness reached a new level. I was walking down a flight of stairs, sneezed, and proceeded to fall down, scraping the crap out of my knees and spraining my dominant wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 70

I'll see you in court

By UGGHhhhhh - 13/01/2026 00:00

Today, my nail client came with yet another sob story about a bill being on autopay and they took it from her account before her appointment. I set boundaries and said I won’t proceed until I’m paid in full (She owes over $300). She responded by trashing my shop. $1000 in nail polish supplies down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 66

Out of service

By Anonymous - 14/01/2026 20:00

Today, after I injured my left wrist from holding my nephew the wrong way for too many hours on New Year's, and found out that it would optimistically take 4-6 weeks to heal, this morning I managed to give myself second degree burns on my right hand from handling a tray I didn't know was hot. So that's three weeks with no hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 149

Busted

By Busted - 16/01/2026 15:00

Today, my husband planned a surprise party. He would pretend to forget my birthday, I'd leave in a rage and go to my best friend's house, where the surprise party would be. It would have been a great plan had I gone to her house and not my side dick's apartment. Now I'm totally fucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57

You deserved it 1 425

Check where you're posting

By Lauren - 18/01/2026 09:00

Today, I typed a vulnerable “I miss you” text to my ex at 1 a.m., stared at it, and meant to delete it. Instead I hit send… to our old family group chat, which still had his mother and my aunt in it. My phone blew up with dumb sympathy, a single eggplant emoji from my cousin, and a lecture from his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 467

New avenue

By Pride lost - 20/01/2026 03:00

Today, my girlfriend and I went out with one of her guy friends. After two bars, we ended up back at her place and somehow the three of us ended up in bed. I was a Gold Star Lesbian and now I'm just a slutty bi girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 399

I should've known

By I hate it too - 25/01/2026 12:00

Today, and every day for the past five months since I got married, whenever my husband and I try to have sex, I think of it as "wifely duties" and it turns me off so much. I can't stop, and we haven't had sex once. My husband is frustrated and angry, and keeps commenting that he should have known this would happen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 525

Not my problem

By I cleaned it...slowly... - 27/01/2026 03:00

Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 84

Bent out of shape

By Anonymous - 28/01/2026 22:00

Today, my stepmom noticed that I lean more to one side when I walk. I'd never noticed this. I've had right hip pain and both my parents agree this was to compensate for that. I've also been doing stretches for a few days but they haven't helped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 72

Crash

By Anonymous - 01/02/2026 12:00

Today, I was proud of myself for buying the lowest calorie option at a Subway that I could walk to. By the time I managed to get there my blood sugar severely crashed (it didn't help that two people in front of me were ordering subs for their family and coworkers). I ended up buying six cookies to stave off the crash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 179

You deserved it 269

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The Top

Today, my budgie learned to fly, having finally outgrown his clipped wings. He flew straight over the gate, out the door and into my dogs jaws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 090

You deserved it 1 711

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I canceled my Gamefly account. Seems that was the only thing keeping us together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 091

You deserved it 4 405

Today, my husband, who's a recovering alcoholic, and I are on holiday with our kids. He's decided he can have a few drinks because he deserves "a holiday too". He doesn't see why this should ruin ours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 656

You deserved it 3 177

Today, my mother told me to my face that if she could do it all over again, she wouldn't have had kids. Thanks, Mum. It's not like I asked to be born. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 146

Today, I proposed to the girl of my dreams. She asked me who I was, and maced me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 1 306

Today, my daughter came home in actual tears because a guy from college “dared”, yes “dared” to turn her down. She then went on a rant about how he “claimed to have a girlfriend” and “clearly doesn’t know how popular she is.” Clearly, I’ve raised a Mean Girl with a future as a 3-time divorcee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 566