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OP here. Thanks lol. That's actually exactly what I was doing. I'm only 21, and I work in a very professional office, and I always need to look my best. I can't afford new shoes at the time, so that's why I sharpied them.

By Anonymous - 14/05/2011 13:17 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my wedding day, and I have uncontrollable diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 793

You deserved it 5 160

You'll get the hang of it

By meganisabella - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went driving for the first time. I made it twenty miles to my stepmom's house, and didn't stop until I was inside the garage. Too bad the garage door was closed when I got there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 863

You deserved it 18 033

By Smile No More - 13/05/2011 12:27

Today, I was wondering why I was getting strange looks all day at work. When I got to a mirror after my shift, I noticed a booger hanging out of my nose, which was visible only when I smiled. My job involves greeting people all day with a huge smile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 172

You deserved it 5 980

Fight!

By Anonymous - 31/08/2022 06:00

Today, my boyfriend has never gotten along with my dad, but this afternoon during what I thought was a completely normal conversation, he just stood up, yelled he couldn’t take my dad anymore, punched him in the nose, dumped me, and drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 251

You deserved it 256

Great idea!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my husband sat me down on the couch so he could share some "awesome" news with me. He excitedly declared that he and his idiot drinking buddies are planning on running a real-life Fight Club out of our basement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 285

You deserved it 3 320

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Today, I told my 4-year-old daughter that when she grew up she could work at a daycare, like me, to help all of the little kids like her. She started crying because she thought it was a bad job to have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 782

You deserved it 1 769

Today, I had to work a double shift after my relief called in "sick" just so he could go to a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 912

You deserved it 2 565

Today, I acted like I always do when I'm alone in my seemingly sound-proof apartment. I sang loudly, talked back to the TV, used my vibrator. Later, in the silence of the night, I heard my neighbor next door YAWNING. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 786

You deserved it 35 915

Today, I noticed the woman I've been sleeping with for over two years never lets me see her naked during sex. I confronted her about it and she replied, "I don't care if you see me naked. I was just leaving the lights off the whole time so I don't have to see you naked." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 428

You deserved it 4 665

Today, the girl of my dreams rejected my advances once again. This is a girl who’s had her heart broken over and over again by cheaters and abusers. She can’t even recognize something great, even if it’s staring at her in the face. What do I have to do to end her vicious cycle of endless heartbreak? FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 1 917

Today, I took my motorbike out for the first time ever, after having waited for five weeks for it to be returned from the mechanics. Three hours later and I crashed after getting caught in the rain and hitting an oil patch on the road. Looks like I won't be riding until it's fixed. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 397

You deserved it 215