The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month

The top of the year

I'm horny, horny horny horny

By It was a mistake!! - 12/11/2025 20:00

Today, I got drunk at a party at our house. At the end, my husband passed out, so his best friend and I carried him to bed. His best friend is stupidly hot and I get horny when I'm drunk, so on a whim I made a pass at him. He shut me down and later told my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51

You deserved it 905

Squeaking the day away

By Anonymous - 23/11/2025 12:00

Today, I wore new shoes to work, which turned out to be the loudest shoes on the planet when walking on the office lino. Every step echoed like a cartoon villain entering a room. My coworker asked if I needed some WD-40. I still had six hours left to walk around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 300

You deserved it 93

Are you OK?

By Anonymous - 02/12/2025 09:00

Today, I answered a call I thought was from my friend and opened with, “What do you want, fuck face?” It was actually my dentist confirming my appointment. There was a long pause before she politely repeated my name to ensure they had the right patient. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48

You deserved it 513

Narrative

By ADHD - 16/12/2025 15:00

Today, I tried explaining a movie plot to a group of friends, only for them to inform me I had described three completely different movies. One said my version actually sounded better. Another asked if I’d hit my head recently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 231

You deserved it 144

Walmart's got talent

By lost in music - 21/12/2025 20:00

Today, I wore my new noise-canceling ear buds in a grocery store and nodded along, getting into the groove. When I took them off at checkout, the cashier asked who I was talking to. I realized I’d been quietly singing to myself ASMR-style while making intense eye contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76

You deserved it 405

Good comeback

By Juice Ko Day! - 27/12/2025 03:00

Today, three minutes into on our Christmas Family Reunion, I got kicked out and now probably permanently. What did I do? My aunt, who NEVER FAILS to do this, did loudly the, "Wow! You've gotten fat!" greeting on me, whereas I responded with an even louder, "And WOW! You've gotten even uglier!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 566

You deserved it 111

My finest hour

By Christine - 01/01/2026 12:00

Today, I slipped while getting off a bus and caught myself dramatically on the handrail. As I spun around like a stripper, the bus driver stared as if I’d performed a stunt. I nodded like it was planned and walked away, limping slightly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 326

You deserved it 77

Knackered

By Anonymous - 28/01/2026 00:00

Today, it was my last day decorating a customer's house, I had one room to paint and that was it. I sat down on the stairs to check my phone before starting and woke up four hours later to the customer shaking me to see if I was alive, and then yelling at me for getting paid to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 105

You deserved it 460

Loner

By Anonymous - 31/01/2026 15:00

Today, I broke it off with all of my friends with benefits. Why? Because I have grown attached to a fictional character, and I like him a lot more than any IRL person. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 544

Overreacting

By Anonymous - 13/02/2026 00:00

Today, I thought my man was cheating on me. I took a screenshot his bank transactions because I found a woman’s name. I went down a rabbit hole and it turned out it’s the name of an actual store / company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48

You deserved it 652

Blame bad TV plots

By The kids aren't alright - 14/02/2026 20:00

Today, I learned that my 11 year-old daughter wrote a love letter to her teacher. Cute, right? It was an incredibly graphic letter where she asked him to "abduct her and chain her up in his basement." I now must find her a new school and a therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 491

You deserved it 92

Turned off

By Anonymous - 23/02/2026 20:00

Today, I recently got a boyfriend, a real nice guy, but unfortunately it means I discovered for the first time that during the ovulation phase of my cycle when I’m super horny I actually can’t stand him. I'm stood there craving sex, and the guy I could be having sex with turns my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108

You deserved it 216

Evel Knievel tribute act

By Anonymous - 25/02/2026 15:00

Today, I was riding down a hill on my bike, doing a wheelie, when I lost control and started heading towards a woman on the sidewalk. Don't worry, I didn't hit her, the man beside her lunged and shoved my bike so hard that I hit concrete and broke three teeth. He then screamed, "Watch it, punk!" and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 825

Trapped

By FamilyIsTheBest - 11/03/2026 20:00

Today, I am forced to throw a baby shower for my entitled and witch of a sister in law. She and her husband have been making my life living hell for more than 10 years now. What their hellspawn would do, God only knows. No, I can't walk away. It's a cultural thing. I'm trapped until death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 300

You deserved it 119

Take a look at this shit

By Sara - 13/03/2026 15:00

Today, I went to the doctor for advice on the horrid diarrhea problem I have, because I go every thirty minutes. Luckily, I had two very big stool samples to give my doctor when I got there. Why? Due to slow drivers and hitting ALL the red lights, it took an hour to get to the doctor's. Life sure is good when it's easygoing, huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 240

You deserved it 50

Trading places

By Anonymous - 29/03/2025 16:00 - United States

Today, I had to comfort my husband after he had a dream in which both his parents died. He was really upset. Both my parents are dead… in real life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 122

Never enough, never

By Anonymous - 02/04/2025 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, after I took my mom her favourite wine, a card, and an expensive orchid for her conservatory, and also spent all Saturday afternoon with her and took her out for lunch, what did she post on Facebook? Her disappointment that I didn’t spend Mother’s Day with her on Sunday because I was working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 488

You deserved it 70

Pretend I'm not here

By Bad bridesmaid - 11/05/2025 09:00 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I was a bridesmaid at my best friend’s wedding. During the ceremony, I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to stifle it, but when I sneezed, my bouquet flew out of my hands and into the groom’s face. It knocked his glasses off, and everyone was silent until the groom finally said, “Are you implying you oppose our marriage?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 444

You deserved it 115

You seem delighted

By Anonymous - 16/05/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my mom walked into my room without knocking to have a whole conversation about some distant relative's birthday in 3 months time. The whole time I had my bullet vibe still up inside me, so I had to talk to my mom while trying not to react to having an orgasm in front of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 150

Such a rush

By Anonymous - 20/05/2025 09:00 - United Kingdom - Loughborough

Today, at the park, I saw my toddler fall. I rushed over, picked him up, and said, “It’s OK, Mum’s here.” He looked confused. So did his real mum. I had mistakenly grabbed a random child instead of my own in front of everyone. They weren't even wearing similar clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 169

You deserved it 462

Never again

By Lex - 21/05/2025 21:00 - United States - Edison

Today, I gave my kid some Pop Rocks. He shoveled a handful in his mouth, then screamed when they started popping and spat them all over the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 124

You deserved it 452

The absolute betrayal

By rejected - 03/06/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, my ex is sleeping in the basement for a few days until he can find a new place. All three of my cats would rather snuggle with him on the couch, even though two of them hate each other. None want to be with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 185

Non-confrontational

By Anonymous - 19/06/2025 12:00 - Australia

Today, I received a text breakup from my boyfriend while we were sitting right next to each other on the couch. He said, “This isn’t working,” and I had to ask, “Is this a joke? You’re literally here.” His phone was on silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 99

The road to hell…

By Chris - 21/07/2025 08:00 - United States

Today, I wanted to donate blood for the first time ever at the The 38th Annual Rock and Roll Up Your Sleeve Blood Drive. Unfortunately, someone with my exact name & birthdate was already in the system and 30 minutes were spent trying to correct the problem. Eventually, I got frustrated and left. No good deed goes unpunished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 128

A blind date in 2025 is brave

By Anonymous - 26/07/2025 22:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went on a blind date at a coffee shop. I walked up to who I thought was him, smiled, and said, “Hey! You look even cuter in person!” He looked horrified. It wasn’t my date. My actual date witnessed the whole thing and ghosted me mid-latte. FML

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 275

Thanks for nothing

By Anonymous - 02/08/2025 16:00 - United States

Today, I was surprised to see a little extra cash in my account for no reason. Confused, (and a little concerned about fraud) I called customer service. Turns out my dad had accidentally used the wrong routing number and put the money in the wrong account. So much for that extra $35. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 130

To serve and protect

By Stupid dog - 11/08/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was giving me some good dick, only for us to be interrupted by banging on the door. He had to jump out a window. Serves me right for cheating, huh? Except I'm not married, it was just my psycho overprotective pit bull who smashed the door open when he heard us moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 224

You never know

By Anonymous - 16/08/2025 21:00 - United States - Ballston Spa

Today, a woman came up to my cash register, where I was struggling with the cash, and asked if we took cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 334

You deserved it 109

Awesome

By Jadwiga - 27/08/2025 20:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, when my boyfriend came home, I was crying and told him I was pregnant. His immediate response was, "Awesome! Pregnant girls are always horny and we won't need protection for the next few months!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 382

You deserved it 182

I can explain

By Anonymous - 29/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, on my lunch break, I was walking to my car balancing 3 tacos, soda and napkins. A gust of wind blew my napkins up the street. In my attempt to catch them, I tripped onto the sidewalk. The tacos landed inside a car. Its owner came out just in time to see me standing next to their dash covered in salsa and lettuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 311

You deserved it 162

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I was acting as Prince Charming for a 5 year old's birthday party. After my scene at the ball, the narrator asked the kids, "Was the Prince handsome?" and they all replied with a chorus of "Nooooo!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 32

Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 672

You deserved it 2 163

Today, I was arguing with my girlfriend when my dog brought me a squeaky toy and tried shoving it into my hand so I could throw it for him. Out of habit, I grabbed it, but then it squeaked every time I tried to make a serious point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 430

Today, I was told that, although I was sick on the last day before break, they would still accept the 24 page essay that I had written. Tonight, as I went to print it out, I found that my dad had "cleaned up a bit" on my computer, including the documents from last semester. I have school tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 596

You deserved it 3 332

Today, I was about to enter a hotel with a friend-with-benefits. We then saw her boyfriend exiting the same hotel with another woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 307

You deserved it 2 015

Today, I set my phone alarm to play a calm piano song so I’d wake up peacefully. Instead, Bluetooth connected to the speaker in my roommate’s room and blasted my alarm at full volume at 6 a.m. for both of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 126

You deserved it 325