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I wanna go home

By "Anonymous survey" my ass - 04/06/2026 07:00 - Brazil - Itajaí

Today, I got written up at work. Apparently, "Going fully remote" is not an answer to "How can we be more sustainable at work and help save the planet?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 72

Recruitment hell

By Unemployedloser - 07/06/2026 18:00 - Canada - Mississauga

Today, I had a job interview and the interviewer assumed that since I'm short, I wouldn't be able to take the garbage out. Yesterday I had another interviewer call me a loser for being a stay-at-home mom. I'm gonna be unemployed forever it seems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 365

You deserved it 71

Pushing it too far

By SayWhatNow - 11/06/2026 12:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, weeks after I tried to make connections with my husband's relatives by talking and being nice to them, basic courtesy, the relative's daughter gave me a 300$ Sephora makeup list that she expects me to gift her. We're not broke, but this seems a little too much to me. Is it me? FML

I agree, your life sucks 50

You deserved it 4

Home sweet home

By Enough - 20/06/2025 01:00 - Romania

Today, when I got home from the store, the dog was wiping his ass on the carpet, my two older boys were brawling, my youngest was crying because he'd broken a glass and cut himself, and my husband was in the kitchen, eating the cake I'd told him to leave alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 95

Thanks, I hate it

By billie - 27/06/2025 03:00 - Canada

Today, a stranger told me, “You have a great personality!” I thought it was a sweet compliment until they added, “…because your face could absolutely use some work.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 402

You deserved it 91

Brain freeze

By Anonymous - 16/07/2025 20:00 - Australia

Today, I spent 10 minutes searching for my phone while on a call. Turns out, I had absentmindedly put it in the freezer while grabbing a snack. It was frozen solid, but at least I found it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 337

Concerning

By Anonymous - 22/07/2025 02:00 - United Kingdom

Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 528

Right on time

By Debz - 29/07/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I was already late so I sprinted to catch the bus. Just as I jumped on, my left shoe flew off, and I practically tripped over my own feet, falling flat on my face in a bus full of strangers. The driver asked, "You OK Ma’am?" while stifling laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 114

Stolen valor

By Anonymous - 08/08/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, at the grocery store, I saw a woman rubbing her belly lovingly and said, “Aw, congratulations!” She replied, “On what?” There was no baby. Just bread. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89

You deserved it 462

Sending hugs

By Anonymous - 12/08/2025 03:00 - United States - North Augusta

Today, my mental illness hit rock bottom when I caught myself wishing I was buried next to my dog because nothing makes me happy anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 67

Sticky

By Zenoa - 13/08/2025 18:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, I went to work hungover. I was in the back room by myself and thought I could trust a fart. I was so very wrong, and on my own for the next three hours and couldn't go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 456

Boo!

By Repeal2A - 11/09/2025 12:00

Today, I was protesting a newly-opened gun store near my house, demanding safer streets and fewer firearms. My husband and the troglodytes he works with turned up and went inside to browse. Later, he raged at me for embarrassing him in front of his buddies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 558

Wobbly

By Anonymous - 15/09/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I tripped getting on an escalator and instinctively grabbed the nearest person to steady myself. That person was a toddler. The mom screamed, I fell anyway, and the toddler just stared at me like I’d ruined his whole week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 420

Life comes at you fast

By Anonymous - 18/09/2025 15:00

Today, I’m 20, pregnant, and getting a divorce. I asked my soon to be ex why he even bothered marrying me in the first place. He said it’s because his parents “made him.” I can’t believe I’m going to be a pregnant divorcee before I’m even able to legally have my first drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 230

You deserved it 462

Snuggle

By Anonymous - 22/09/2025 03:00

Today, I wanted to surprise my partner by leaving a love letter on his car's windshield while he was at work. He texted me later saying, “You know you left that on my coworker’s car, right?” Now some stranger thinks I want to “snuggle forever.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 401

Celebrate!

By Anonymous - 02/10/2025 20:00

Today, I bought some party poppers to surprise my roommate to celebrate her recent promotion. I pulled one the strings too early, in the lobby of our building. A hundred tiny paper stars rained down while my neighbor, who had just spilled her grocery bag out of fright as she entered the building, yelled at me like I was a lunatic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 440

A star is born

By PizzaPuff - 15/10/2025 09:00

Today, while watching the morning news, I unexpectedly saw myself! Too bad I was looking puffy at a pizza buffet, loading up my plate. I have tendinitis in my arm and wrist, and the NSAIDs hadn’t kicked in yet. At least I dressed up that day, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 289

You deserved it 102

Deal breaker

By Horny pig - 26/10/2025 20:00

Today, my fiancée told me that she thinks she's asexual. Guess I know why we haven't had sex in months. When I said this was a deal breaker, she said, "If you'd stop being a horny pig for five seconds, it wouldn't be." FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 89

Surprised indeed

By Wuuut - 30/10/2025 09:00

Today, I decided to surprise my girlfriend by showing up at her place with flowers and dinner. She opened the door wearing pajamas… and standing next to her was another guy wearing the same pajamas. They both looked at me like I was the intruder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 75

What did you expect?

By Not Marge - 22/11/2025 09:00

Today, my husband is hurt and upset that our daughter legally changed her name the day she turned 18. I had to ask him, as nicely as I could, what the hell he expected when he named her Lisa and her last name is Simpson. FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 166

Life on the North Pole

By Late for work (at least I had an excuse) - 11/12/2025 22:00

Today, after a snowstorm, I went to start my car early in the morning for work. The door was frozen solid, so I had to jimmy it open with a screwdriver. Then, as I started to drive off, my foot slipped off the clutch and the car stalled out. The battery was too weak to start it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 341

You deserved it 81

Did the rescue work?

By Hero of the day - 19/12/2025 00:00

Today, I tried a heroic rescue: a toddler’s teddy stuck on a fifth-floor balcony. I borrowed a ladder, climbed while sweating, reached it, and felt my trousers rip with a sound like Velcro in a thunderstorm. Dangling there with my superhero boxers exposed, three people filmed me while jeering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 310

You deserved it 97

Not my fault!

By Anonymous - 22/12/2025 12:00

Today, I tried to be helpful by holding the door open for a woman carrying boxes. She smiled and hurried toward me, then tripped and dropped everything at my feet. She stared at me like I'd caused it, and said, “Thanks” through clenched teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 372

You deserved it 85

Seasonal depression

By Anonymous - 27/12/2025 20:00

Today, I was speaking with my therapist about future romantic endeavors. I'm currently separating from my husband of three years. I feel it's unlikely I will ever date again, and I've developed a phobia of sex over the past year. It's so severe that I cannot even masturbate. Destined to die alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 150

I'm your man

By Anonymous - 31/12/2025 09:00

Today, I had a fourth and final round interview for a well paying job for which I'm very qualified that I need because my own business in the same field fell off a cliff after 15 straight successful years. The woman who interviewed me hated me from the start and lied about my analysis on simple things in her report. I didn't get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 82

ADHD brain

By Anonymous - 12/01/2026 20:00

Today, I cleaned my room, which I’d been putting off for ages. Halfway through, I sat down “just for a second” to check my phone. Two hours later, I was still scrolling, surrounded by half-sorted piles of stuff. When my roommate walked in and asked if I was reorganizing or giving up, I didn’t know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 371

Memories…

By Anonymous - 14/01/2026 15:00

Today, I dug out an old yearbook to look up one of my teachers. Instead, I immediately found the signature of my horrible ex, claiming my “yearbook virginity.” He got my physical virginity too, through some extremely unethical means. I hate him for being a scumbag, and myself for being a fool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 395

You deserved it 119

Parenting is tough

By Paul - 18/01/2026 03:00

Today, I rushed to a pharmacy with a sick toddler and handed the pharmacist my insurance card. He looked at it and said, “This expired six months ago.” I’d been using the digital copy on my phone the whole time and didn’t realize my insurer had changed my group number. I left with a $120 bill and a sticky-handed kid who refused to take medicine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 318

You deserved it 148

Happy birthday, huh?

By Anonymous - 19/01/2026 22:00

Today, I told my family that for my birthday I didn’t want to do any chores and just wanted the house cleaned. What they heard was mom won’t do chores today so let’s leave them all for her tomorrow. I didn’t even have a clean mug for coffee this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 483

You deserved it 89

Traumatic

By Anonymous - 26/01/2026 22:00

Today, I sent my kids to play in the back garden and immediately heard them screaming. We buried our dog last week and last night some animal dug her up and spread the bones and rotting flesh around. The stench was horrendous, the kids are traumatized, and I vomited while reburying the bits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 137

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The Top

Today, my wife's paranoia reached a new level. She spent a half hour fretting over the idea that one of the cleaning ladies at our hotel might have taken a used condom from our room and tried to get pregnant with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 554

You deserved it 1 500

Today, my college charged me for tuition for next semester. I graduated two years ago. I have a degree from a place too stupid to only charge current students. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 656

You deserved it 2 349

Today, I joined a small disaster relief group. I remarked to the big, long-haired person beside me that it was surprising that I was the only female in the group. I got a cold stare. Later I asked another volunteer about that person. He answered, "Oh, her? She's my sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 254

You deserved it 39 052

Today, my wife and I went shopping for new glasses at a local store, but we didn't really get to actually buying one. On our way back, she warned me that my glasses of choice should in no way be 'those big arty ones'. When I asked her why not, she told me that I 'look gay enough already'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 787

You deserved it 6 373

Today, I was finally confident enough to buzz half my hair off into the style I've wanted since I was young. Turns out that I have a particularly large and angry-looking skin problem across my scalp that may well have been there for years. It'll take months to grow back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 434

You deserved it 872

Today, after a year and a half of overexploitation at work without getting paid for it, I can finally have a deserved vacation. Why? I caught Covid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 996

You deserved it 153