By Potato_Lord - 12/11/2015 04:11 - United States - Madison

Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 795
You deserved it 1 481
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Top comments

miazangl 13

At least you can get the police involved for theft, public intoxication and property damage so it's not a complete loss.

118 3
S0LUS 16

Call the police, no one should do that

67 1

Comments

dietcoke09 25

Out of all states I really wouldn't think this would happen in Wisconsin.. Sorry OP!

2 2
worldclassrager 39

No payment on your end it's all on the thief...

2 1
beeferjay 34

time to get a gun, if you don't already have one. busting a cap in sometimes ass is sometimes called for... sometimes

2 5
shelby_franklin 16

Why do you have a bike in 2015

0 12
dabaerju 23

Why do ignorant people like yourself exist in 2015

7 1
Mynamewontfi 40

You should come to the Netherlands. Almost everyone owns a bike here and uses them a lot. Why use a car when you can get a nice exercise while going from A to B? And good for the environment as well.

5 1
Jwaye2 7

Lots of people have bikes. I have 3 cars and a motorbike I can use but i still ride my pushbike to the local shops and the gym. OP also didnt specify if it was a motorbike or a push bike but everyone is assuming push bike.

1 1
Internetflakes 13

#23 which is why the Netherlands barely has polution!

1 1
Colon_Man 17

I first read#26 as "barely has population." I thought, "are they riding themselves to death?"

1 1
darkenedone 27

how do you know they were drunk?

0 4
XxGaLaXy_HiTzxX 14

Because I too occasionally just steal people's bikes and crash them into front porches.

3 0
buckdharma 37

He wants to ride your bicycle. He wants to ride it where he likes.

2 2
JCRouzer29 27

I was kind of hoping there would also be a "On an unrelated note, I also broke my leg in my drunken haze last night".

1 1
Potato_Lord 18

Now that's it's been 24 hours the story gets even better. Turns out the man that stole my rode it to a bar where he got drunk and confided in the bartender that he stole my bike. The bartender then made the man cry from guilt and convinced him into returning the bike to me. Aperently somewhere along the bike ride to my house he figured out the best way to do this was to do this was to ride it into my living room and surprise me. No joke that is what he told the police in interigation. But it doesn't stop there. When I called my insurance company to file a claim they thought it was a prank call and hung up on me and none of my calls have gotten through since. This has been an amazing two days.

7 0
Colon_Man 17

Good thing here didn't steal your car, then.

1 0
laurelfire 15

Well you should have chained the bike, OP!

0 1