Intimacy, Health, Sex and AITA: Dirty girl - FML

Dirty girl

By I like sex dirty but not THAT dirty! - 20/07/2024 11:00 - United States - Anaheim

Spicy

Today, my husband is upset because I’ve been turning him down when he tries to initiate sex as soon as I walk in the door. I work 12 hour shifts as an ER nurse and the thought of getting into bed without showering away all the day's germs repulses me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 622

You deserved it 173

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Same thing different taste

Greasy

By Stank - 06/05/2018 19:00

Today, my husband is going on his fifth consecutive day without a shower. He’s been working 16-hour shifts, and though I'm empathetic to his exhaustion, his foul body odor has overtaken the bedroom, and his excretions have discolored his side of the bed. I fear the worst. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 342

You deserved it 403

Kinky

By marysparklez - 05/03/2021 22:59

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend is once again mad at me because I refused to have shower sex with him. I’m too embarrassed to explain to him that ever since I could remember, if I don’t take my showers sitting down, I vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 975

You deserved it 491

My husband the shitgibbon

By NotYetThanks - 23/07/2021 00:01

Spicy

Today, three weeks after a traumatic emergency cesarean section, my husband keeps sulking because sex is the literal last thing I want right now. The fact that my body is still sore and healing is apparently irrelevant when he is horny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 993

You deserved it 194

Grossed out

By anne - 07/01/2016 12:00 - Germany

Spicy

Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 254

You deserved it 4 824

That's gross, dude

By Anonymous - 31/10/2020 23:02

Spicy

Today, it's Saturday and a planned date night for my partner and me. He's not showered since Tuesday and was surprised that I requested that he to do so ahead of getting intimate. And he wonders why our sex life isn't better… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 355

You deserved it 202

Knackered

By Tired - 25/12/2018 12:00

Spicy

Today, was my first day off in almost a month. My husband and I spent all morning arguing, then he left to his job saying he wouldn't be back tonight. Apparently I'm being neglectful because I don't have the energy for sex after being the only one working full time, cooking, cleaning, and running errands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 007

You deserved it 440

Meat

By tomedicalforlove - 21/02/2013 05:51

Spicy

Today, my husband and I were fooling around in the shower. For some reason, I thought it'd be a good idea to grab his man meat and show him how to wash someone at a nursing home. He said he'd never be turned on by a nurse again. I'm a nurse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 140

You deserved it 42 008

By AR Good - 26/03/2019 11:00 - United States - Hawthorne

Spicy

Today, my husband is pissed off, withholding affection, and not speaking to me. Why? I don't want to have sex with random men while he watches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 075

You deserved it 239

Man flu

By INeedRest - 26/07/2025 09:00 - Germany

Today, whenever I try to rest or I get sick and tell my husband, almost immediately he says he's unwell with the same thing and dumps all the chores on my head. When I have a fever, magically he gets the fever too, then blames me for getting him sick. I really need rest from my chores. FML

I agree, your life sucks 458

You deserved it 105

Infuriating

By Lauren - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, my husband declined a $100k/year job due to him thinking that a full-time job at one work place would be too "depressing." I'm a nurse and have to wipe other people's arses for a living, then come home to this lazy dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 126

You deserved it 8 838

Next

Top comments

Wadlaen 23

Saturday 20 July 2024 22:16

You should tell him, it's probably the best for both of you that he knows this.

GoogieWithers 23

Monday 22 July 2024 2:02

Just tell him you need a shower first and explain why. In graphic detail if necessary.

Comments

Wadlaen 23

Saturday 20 July 2024 22:16

You should tell him, it's probably the best for both of you that he knows this.

GoogieWithers 23

Monday 22 July 2024 2:02

Just tell him you need a shower first and explain why. In graphic detail if necessary.

nkunzi 4

Monday 22 July 2024 17:16

Maybe the germs turn him on.

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Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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The Top

Today, I was ringing up a lady’s items; two shoeboxes. Per policy, I’m supposed to open them. She heavily insisted I didn’t. I ignored her and found other merchandise inside. She then went on a rant on how "people should mind their own fucking business" and stormed out of the store without buying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 905

You deserved it 128

Today, I got home after a night of drinking with my coworker. We hooked up, but he was so drunk he had to use a flashlight to put it in. Then, he ran out of the room to throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 783

You deserved it 917

Today, I had a chest X-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 128

You deserved it 2 475

Today, I was put in lockup for accidentally scaring the officer by lifting my hand to scratch my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 671

You deserved it 236

Today, my boyfriend gave me a really sweet poem that he wrote for me. I think it was secondhand - the first letter of each verse spelled his ex girlfriend's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 180

You deserved it 2 455

Today, my boyfriend brought home some expensive ice cream and we licked it off of each other. It was fun until we learned that dried ice cream on skin smells almost exactly like puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 253

You deserved it 396