Miscellaneous: Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs....

By anonymous - 15/01/2012 05:58 - United States

Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 590

You deserved it 7 684

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/12/2012 00:58 - United States

Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 439

You deserved it 10 279

Good bye!

By Anonymous - 19/01/2020 20:00

Today I was walking around the mall and I saw my crush from high school. He came up to me and instead of talking to him I burped, and he just walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 788

You deserved it 755

By john - 28/01/2009 23:02 - United States

Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for two years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 856

You deserved it 5 157

By killmenow - 03/12/2015 05:33 - Canada - Halifax

Today, I burped in front of my crush. Well, not really in front of him. I turned around mid-burp and noticed him, not knowing anyone was there. The surprise made me scream a little, which only amplified the burp. So I made this mighty belch-turned-scream noise, while maintaining eye contact with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 282

You deserved it 2 658

By Anonymous - 01/03/2010 22:04 - United States

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 745

You deserved it 10 948

By sydneybourgeois - 13/08/2011 04:06 - United States

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 536

You deserved it 16 158

By perverted teenage girl - 29/11/2016 21:51

Today, my crush was giving a presentation in class. I zoned out and began staring off into space - which happened to be in the exact direction of his crotch. When I realized what I was doing, I quickly looked up at his face. He was already looking at me, with an expression of severe discomfort. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 119

You deserved it 1 918

By Mojo - 14/12/2009 17:06 - United Kingdom

Today, my crush took me to a park and told me he loved me. We sat on an old bench and were just about to kiss when I screamed. I now have a huge splinter in my arse and he can't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 578

You deserved it 5 195

My body hates me

By HappilyNeverAfter - 18/09/2014 03:14 - Canada - Port Perry

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 858

You deserved it 5 293

Prankster

By longlostkid556 - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, the girl I have a crush on came over to work on a project. My dad rushed into the room we were in, farted, and then ran out giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 727

You deserved it 5 893

daybid 7

Sunday 15 January 2012 12:21

Well that stinks!

anzie_fml 9

Sunday 15 January 2012 12:22

That's a very interesting way for him to be greeting you, especially if you're still just calling him your "crush"... O.o

Comments

thatshot808 6

Sunday 15 January 2012 18:44

Yea or sneeze when he wants to rub noses

RedPillSucks 31

Sunday 15 January 2012 19:22

Congratulations. You just destroyed his fantasy about girls not farting. Now he thinks you're a dude.

ravenxcorvinus 9

Sunday 15 January 2012 19:30

lol that sucks, nervous gas can be very embarrassing. don't worry OP it all blow over.. :) lol

clutz123 5

Sunday 15 January 2012 19:42

i've seen ones like this before while moderating, and i still don't get how surprise can make you fart.

nelsokev 6

Sunday 15 January 2012 20:37

I'm hungry completely unrelated.

_MidnightLuna_ 17

Sunday 15 January 2012 21:18

Ouch, sorry to hear that bro. Better luck with your next crush.

5upernova 3

Sunday 15 January 2012 22:20

Not only does he not respect your personal space, but he avoids you now? Sounds like he isn't worth it.

DavidaNicole 0

Sunday 15 January 2012 22:36

Thts.pretty sad :(

chelsinator 8

Sunday 15 January 2012 23:38

Because girls DON'T fart or poop...

zebrapattern 6

Sunday 15 January 2012 23:56

you probably farted in them, so now he can't.

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You deserved it 2 261

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You deserved it 188

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I agree, your life sucks 12 714

You deserved it 886

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I agree, your life sucks 620

You deserved it 155

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I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 83

Same thing different taste

Good bye!

My body hates me

Prankster

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