Miscellaneous: Today, I witnessed the homeless man that visits my neighborhood...

By Brook363 - 27/05/2009 15:39 - United States

Today, I witnessed the homeless man that visits my neighborhood placing bags containing his own poop in my trash cans. I later received a notice stating that the garbage company will not provide my residence with garbage service until I “refrain from placing bags of my own feces in the trash.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 810

You deserved it 3 112

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Same thing different taste

By ugh - 14/06/2011 17:56 - United States

Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 716

You deserved it 3 929

By assassinmaster - 04/05/2017 04:00

Today, I saw a kid taking a dump next to my lawn. The good news: his mother picked up the poop to discard it. The bad news: she put it in my mailbox. I now have a pile of smelly brownish tissue-wrapped goo baking under the hot sun inside my mailbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 933

You deserved it 439

There goes the neighborhood…

By Anonymous - 21/10/2021 11:00

Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 037

You deserved it 68

HOA blues

By Anonymous - 22/06/2022 02:00

Today, a neighbor chose today of all days to drop off her junk in front of my condo/apartment. My relative owns and I rent. I got a letter from a different neighbor, stating that if I continue this egregious behavior of using my apartment as a trash dumpster, she will be forced to report me to the HOA. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 191

The poop delivery lady

By Why Me - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Indianapolis

Today, my neighbor finally decided that when she walks her dog, she should pick up his poop. She also decided to leave the poop-filled bags in my driveway. I confronted her about this and she claimed it's never happened. I've watched her multiple times from my front window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 482

You deserved it 2 861

By EwwGross - 31/08/2011 20:15 - United States

Today, I witnessed my neighbor draining his sewage-clogged plumbing into my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 550

You deserved it 1 959

Trash

By Anonymous - 02/04/2017 16:00

Today, I confronted my lousy, loud, messy neighbors about the trash they throw in my yard. They responded by throwing my trash in their yard, then called the police to report me for vandalism and illegal dumping when I returned their trash. Guess who has a court appearance in two weeks… FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 834

You deserved it 446

Snitches get bitches

By d for vendetta - 21/04/2021 23:00

Today, after weeks of asking my neighbor nicely to pick up his dog’s crap out of the common area, I got fed up and reported him to the landlord and the city. He’s now been given two options; either get rid of his dog or move out. He’s now sworn revenge on me, even though he was the one being gross. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 326

You deserved it 260

By MasterWong - 20/06/2018 19:00

Today, I opened my blinds to see the front yard littered with trash. My neighbor's cat ripped our trash bags open and smeared them all over the lawn. Since it was my turn to take out the trash this week, my family decided I would be the one cleaning up too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 544

You deserved it 340

Spooked

By fucking mafia or what?? - 12/01/2013 22:02 - United States - Marysville

Today, I opened my front door to go out for groceries. Lying on my doorstep was a pile of poop. A piece of paper was taped to the ground beside it that read, "Do it again and you'll get more than dog shit." I don't have the slightest clue who I pissed off, or how. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 022

You deserved it 3 464

pasiphae9 5

Wednesday 27 May 2009 23:07

Is your garbage can made of metal? If so, attach the live part of a cattle prod to it so when the homeless guy touches it he gets a shock. You can use gloves to pick up the lid, and detach the prod when the garbage men come round :) Nothing could go wrong, trust me.

jennam_fml 4

Wednesday 27 May 2009 23:12

I agree with number four. It's no different then diapers, and it's in a bag. I put my dogs poop bags in the trash and I've never recieved a letter of any kind about it. But..How did they know it was poop in the bags? Did they rip them open to see? Wtf.

Comments

Templemind47 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 7:31

#8, you are an idiot. Anyone can become homeless, so yes even you. I think I agree with some other people here, that is a BS story. Nice try, but better luck next time

hollykins91 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 8:31

haha this ones not true lets be real now. out of all the houses they pick up from how do they single out yours and send you a letter saying they know you put shit in your garbage can.

that_guy_you_are 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 8:45

That guy is a champ. I shit in bags all the time, it's great.

DoctorManhattan 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 9:45

Write them a letter. You can contest it. Either that or just put your cans out in your neighbor's driveway.

natalieryanlol 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 10:10

#8 my family gave me weird as looks when i laughed so hard after reading your comment but then i felt bad for the guy but its still funny as **** :)

Pepperolls 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 11:51

That was funny, kudos to you for having a homeless man shit in your bins, get accused for it and then sharing it with us to have a laugh at you! hahaha

fhidupsaya 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 12:11

#8 pardon the pun

sbarre1 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 12:55

So.... Tell them to keep homeless bums out of your neighborhood? Problem solved. Gee that was hard.

Emika_fml 0

Thursday 28 May 2009 14:32

Here's what actually happened: OP has a weird feces-fetish thing going on; not only does he save and inspect his own, but he also trolls local restrooms to collect other samples. After bringing the samples home and entertaining himself with them (don't ask for details...) he wraps them in plastic bags and chucks them into his garbage. The quantity became so great that the garbage men had to take notice - hence the letter. And in a small town like this, word quickly spread about Brook363 the Bag-crapper. Now, as part of a devious plan to un-sully his tarnished reputation, he is spreading counter-rumors about some homeless man...