Miscellaneous: Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck....

By Anonymous - 13/04/2012 09:43 - Canada

Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 808

You deserved it 4 278

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Danger zone

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I broke my glasses. How did I break my glasses? A cow kicked me in the face at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 357

You deserved it 332

By Rachal - 30/01/2012 01:27 - United States

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 785

You deserved it 10 925

Bad day for glasses

By Anonymous - 09/10/2022 10:00

Today, I walked into the glass door of my boss’s cabin and broke my spectacles. Thank god for a backup pair, right? Wrong. I fell down the stairs and broke them too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 007

You deserved it 210

By b. - 24/09/2009 10:06 - Australia

Today, I was going shopping with a friend. I got up to get off the train and landed on my ass. Not only had I walked into the metal bar, I'd broken my $800 glasses, and the train doors had closed, with my friend on the other side of the doors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 151

You deserved it 10 877

By vegantreegirl - 04/02/2019 20:00

Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 499

You deserved it 337

Played a blinder

By hereforfmls - 26/12/2019 05:00 - United States - Jasper

Today, I felt something hit my eye as I was riding on my bike. My glasses ended up falling off. I looked for them for ten minutes before giving up. I ran over them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 609

You deserved it 426

Cough up

By cain001 - 04/01/2011 00:56 - United States

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 086

You deserved it 2 547

By BloodyNoseMcgee - 11/10/2018 15:30

Today, I dropped some glass at my job while putting it on the shelf. A shard bounced off the floor and went up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 010

You deserved it 188

By Anonymous - 31/05/2016 15:30 - Canada - Saint John

Today, I fell down the stairs while holding some dirty glasses from my room. I ended up pulling pieces of glass from my body. Meanwhile all my mom cares about is the fact that I broke three of her favorite glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 274

You deserved it 1 853

Car washed

By IHateMyJob - 14/09/2010 02:00 - United States

Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 728

You deserved it 3 399

tkdgold03 5

Friday 13 April 2012 16:15

it must not have been heads up...

scenechic 5

Friday 13 April 2012 16:15

Happy Friday Thee 13th.

Comments

Trisha_aus 15

Saturday 14 April 2012 8:57

I heard pennies are no longer going to be made in Canada...but still, fyl!

goatcheese801 2

Saturday 14 April 2012 9:19

Fuckibg Jew haha

shepandabear123 0

Saturday 14 April 2012 9:34

LAWLZZ! that sucks but i do that all the time to my friends

burntbeard 4

Saturday 14 April 2012 12:39

you didn't get to the penny fast enough for the luck to kick in is all

Plecofish 0

Saturday 14 April 2012 13:14

Might have something to do with pennies no longer being in commission in Canada.

11jaydajanssen11 0

Saturday 14 April 2012 14:50

Poor guy!!! Are you okay? I hope so douch

ebrainer1 9

Saturday 14 April 2012 15:30

Man, the ordinary tails-up bad luck of the penny must have been amplified by friday the 13th, creating the perfect storm of misfortune.

mecca512 4

Saturday 14 April 2012 15:50

Sooo..... How is your day going?

klinkingskittles 5

Saturday 14 April 2012 19:04

PEOPLE these days . :/

earljonez 22

Saturday 14 April 2012 19:43

No, that's not fair, that's not fair!.......there was time now!!!!!

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, I tried carrying all my groceries inside in one trip. I succeeded, but also succeeded in tearing the handles, dropping everything, and rolling a can of soup straight under my neighbor’s car. Never trust cheap tote bags. FML

I agree, your life sucks 173

You deserved it 380

Today, I arrived for a job interview and I wanted to give a firm handshake to make a good impression, because apparently that's a thing. I squeezed the interviewer's hand so hard I heard a "crack" and they winced in pain. I'm never taking advice from a random LinkedIn post ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 668

Today, at the grocery store, an elderly woman asked for help with some tea. I lent her a hand, spending a good twenty minutes reading different labels out loud until she found one she liked. After she was done, she handed me a pamphlet and said, "You're a nice girl. I hope you don't go to hell." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 599

You deserved it 4 831

Today, I bought some mandarins so that there would be at least one healthy thing in my shopping basket, and I wouldn’t feel like such a fat lard at the checkout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 819

You deserved it 1 488

Today, a guy I went on one date with asked me out again via text. Being honest, I texted back, politely saying that he was a good guy but I wasn't really interested. He came over to my house, screaming about how awful I was for "text message breaking up with him" and then cracked my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 475

You deserved it 4 691

Today, I added "a road sign" to my ever-growing list of "Things which have hit my car as a result of the wind." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 568

You deserved it 3 169