Miscellaneous: Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck.... - FML

By Anonymous - 13/04/2012 09:43 - Canada

Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 808

You deserved it 4 278

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Same thing different taste

Danger zone

By anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I broke my glasses. How did I break my glasses? A cow kicked me in the face at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 357

You deserved it 332

By Rachal - 30/01/2012 01:27 - United States

Today, I was standing in the bathroom and farted. It felt like someone stabbed me in the butt. I jumped out of shock, and my head slammed into the mirror. My glasses fell onto the floor and broke. I now need new glasses, a new mirror, and an ice pack for my head. All because I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 785

You deserved it 10 925

Bad day for glasses

By Anonymous - 09/10/2022 10:00

Today, I walked into the glass door of my boss’s cabin and broke my spectacles. Thank god for a backup pair, right? Wrong. I fell down the stairs and broke them too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 007

You deserved it 210

By b. - 24/09/2009 10:06 - Australia

Today, I was going shopping with a friend. I got up to get off the train and landed on my ass. Not only had I walked into the metal bar, I'd broken my $800 glasses, and the train doors had closed, with my friend on the other side of the doors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 151

You deserved it 10 877

By vegantreegirl - 04/02/2019 20:00

Today, I was using the restroom at work when my glasses slipped off my face and landed right in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 499

You deserved it 337

Played a blinder

By hereforfmls - 26/12/2019 05:00 - United States - Jasper

Today, I felt something hit my eye as I was riding on my bike. My glasses ended up falling off. I looked for them for ten minutes before giving up. I ran over them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 609

You deserved it 426

Cough up

By cain001 - 04/01/2011 00:56 - United States

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 086

You deserved it 2 547

By BloodyNoseMcgee - 11/10/2018 15:30

Today, I dropped some glass at my job while putting it on the shelf. A shard bounced off the floor and went up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 010

You deserved it 188

By Anonymous - 31/05/2016 15:30 - Canada - Saint John

Today, I fell down the stairs while holding some dirty glasses from my room. I ended up pulling pieces of glass from my body. Meanwhile all my mom cares about is the fact that I broke three of her favorite glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 274

You deserved it 1 853

Car washed

By IHateMyJob - 14/09/2010 02:00 - United States

Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 728

You deserved it 3 399

Next

Top comments

tkdgold03 5

Friday 13 April 2012 16:15

it must not have been heads up...

scenechic 5

Friday 13 April 2012 16:15

Happy Friday Thee 13th.

Comments

GirlyGal123 3

Friday 13 April 2012 22:52

Hey well today is Friday the 13th!!!

CommanderBalls 10

Friday 13 April 2012 23:15

n

trollierthanthou 1

Friday 13 April 2012 23:22

what is up with all the ironic fmls today. I mean an unlucky penny, and a chick who lost ten pounds but her pants busted still out!

trollierthanthou 1

Friday 13 April 2012 23:24

but still OP you probably needed some good luck, as do most of us, but really how often are you short ONE cent?

trollierthanthou 1

Friday 13 April 2012 23:29

69 how does a Five dollar bill help? I mean maybe a gallon of gas and you could coast home or a happy meal but really five bucks or a penny ain't paying the bills. Kinda pointless, leave it for a hobo.

ladyLALAA 28

Friday 13 April 2012 23:52

Duh, 24 haven't you seen Donnie Darko!

bluejayscheer 7

Friday 13 April 2012 23:56

It's Friday the 13th!

momo1972 3

Saturday 14 April 2012 0:39

Sounds like luck to me

NothingsEasy 4

Saturday 14 April 2012 1:24

Should've Slapped a hoe

alexab1310 9

Saturday 14 April 2012 2:22

That's what happens when you try to pick loose change up from the ground, bum.

waynenight 4

Saturday 14 April 2012 4:50

you're a bum... ya bum

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Today, I complimented a player in a game who protected my ass the whole match. As a joke, I told them to marry me. Turned out the person was a horny 40-something lesbian stalker who spent the next 5 hours sending me pictures and trying to find out where I live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 315

You deserved it 6 268

Today, my girlfriend is giving me the silent treatment and is making me sleep on the couch, all because I said I loved my best female friend. I meant loved like family. She still won’t hear me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 798

Today, I share a bathroom with two other people and we divide tasks equally. They take care of making it dirty; I take care of making it clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 801

You deserved it 136

Today, I heard grunting and then realized it was my tenant with his boyfriend. When I went down to do my laundry, I caught them in the act. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 754

You deserved it 324

Today, I had to take out the grease traps from our fryers. A very rude co-worker cut me off, so I had to abruptly stop and try to prevent as much spilling as possible. Luckily, it only spilled on me. I'm here for six more hours with burned, smelly, greasy spots all over my skin and clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 625

You deserved it 341

Today, I had to listen for over 10 minutes as my brother and grandmother discussed how much they hate me. They thought I was asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 414

You deserved it 332