Today, I was at a bus stop making small talk with a really nice girl, when all of a sudden some kids let off firecrackers behind me. I shrieked like a little girl and practically jumped into her lap. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Family jewels
Today, while on the bus, I had to stand as all the seats were taken. I was standing behind a group of small girls who were messing around with their bags. As they were swinging them, one hit me square in the nuts with her elbow. The girl said, “Wise up, I hardly touched you.” I missed my stop. FML
Awkward
Today, a girl started talking to me at the bus stop. After it descended into an awkward silence, I jumped on my bus to avoid further conversation. She got on the same bus. And got off at the same stop. I swear the whole bus could feel the tension. FML
Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML
Today, as I walked on to the bus, the girl I liked whispered something to her friend. Curious, I asked what was so funny. She said she never realized that when I got on, I shook the bus. FML
Today, I was asleep on a plane. I woke up after feeling the plane jolt and I screamed at the top of my lungs. The little girl next to me told me I was a sissy. Everyone around us laughed. FML
Today, while on the bus, I began to fall asleep. Suddenly, a man next to me started laughing very loudly, scaring me and jolting me out from my nap. I was so scared, I reflexively punched the girl in front of me in the face. I was pinned down by three other men while the cops were called. FML
Little devil
Today, while dropping my son off at the bus stop before school, I went to give him a kiss on the cheek. Then, before I was able to make contact, he jumped away, yelled "PSYCH!!!!" as loud as he could, and jumped on the bus. The kids all laughed at me and the other parents looked embarrassed for me. FML
Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for two years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML
Woah!
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
Top comments
Thisismypchere 8
Haha, she might have thought it was funny and or cute so it may not be that big of a deal. But FYL anyway.
globetrottter 3
Way to show her your 'nerves of steel' :)
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Comments (81)
hateevryone 14
Smooth move
telaier 2
That will be fun if you screams like a little girl in front of me ! still thank you for sharing :)
callums_back 1
Smooth, thats one way breaking the ice...
bubo_fml 10
Dude, use the ol' "I'm suffering from P.T.S.D." line & get in there!!
joshuadavid 0
I would have laughed if I was the girl...
3fingerbanger 0
that's the way to.make the first move
ccjl11 2
Dude I'm a girl and I'd think that's adorable, so if she's as nice as u say she is, she does too
Bebbo_fml 21
Those kids were just playing cupid.
PsudoAnon 20
On the plus side... cute girl's lap.