Kids: Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He seemed excited,...

By fatbabysyndrome - 18/12/2012 17:33 - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He seemed excited, and said we should make the baby fat so he can bounce her on his lap and watch her double chin jiggle. Just to prove he's serious, he's been searching for high-calorie foods for babies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 813

You deserved it 6 366

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Couvade syndrome

By Anonymous - 03/11/2021 08:00

Today my boyfriend overeats when he is upset, and normally keeps tight hold of his diet to control his weight. He assures me he’s happy about it, but since I told him I’m pregnant 3 weeks ago, he’s put on 28 pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 988

You deserved it 196

By Jessie - 22/08/2019 12:01 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 918

You deserved it 343

By Cheer4Life - 11/11/2013 21:41 - United States - Bloomington

Today, after making several comments about how I didn't exactly look thin, my boyfriend said, "Well, at least we know you'll look good pregnant." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 161

You deserved it 10 194

By vikinggirl - 13/09/2010 09:14 - Australia

Today, I asked my boyfriend what he would do if I were to get pregnant. Expecting him to give me a cute and supportive answer, he replied, "We'd be finding you a nice flight of stairs to accidentally fall down." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 122

You deserved it 13 536

By gibsonSG323 - 14/06/2010 23:13 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. While I was asleep, he drew a face on my stomach and when I woke up he was talking to it. He said it would be less weird if he was talking to my stomach with a face on it, representing the baby. According to him, our child is going to have a mustache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 722

You deserved it 28 562

By Anonymous - 18/11/2015 02:13 - United States - Herndon

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 033

You deserved it 9 504

Great, I guess

By Anonymous - 14/12/2013 07:24 - Canada - Milton

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. He seemed thrilled, and went to buy some wine to celebrate. He left 11 hours ago and won't come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 480

You deserved it 8 006

Trapped

By Anonymous - 12/03/2022 05:00 - United States - Mineola

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 274

You deserved it 196

Uglies

By Noname - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I told my boyfriend that I was afraid our future children would be fat and ugly. He reassured me, saying that he was sure our spawn would take on after him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 120

You deserved it 13 679

By Username - 15/09/2010 18:02 - France

Today, after telling me his other girlfriend is pregnant, my boyfriend said we should stay together so I could help out with the baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 083

You deserved it 4 832

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 18 December 2012 22:28

You should tell your idiot boyfriend that pretty much ALL babies are fat. Besides, he should be watching the baby's tushy jiggle. It's much cuter than the chin. Yes, I said "tushy". Yes, I have kids.

celiiceegee 6

Tuesday 18 December 2012 22:30

And later you guys can watch his/her chin jiggle while she competes on the biggest loser.

Comments

Dcm210 19

Tuesday 18 December 2012 23:49

Just feed the baby McDonald's.

PrincessLiLi_fml 7

Tuesday 18 December 2012 23:55

Why is this an FML? Sounds like a great and adorable idea.

ViviMage 39

Tuesday 18 December 2012 23:56

Perfect. Make the kid fat and unhealthy. Great dad

maz95 17

Wednesday 19 December 2012 0:16

Lets hope your baby doesn't inherit your boyfriends brains..

BlondeBubbles 6

Wednesday 19 December 2012 0:23

Hey, at least he's staying.

1dvs_bstd 41

Wednesday 19 December 2012 0:33

...because of guys like your boyfriend, I do hope the world ends. It's painful how people could be so idiotic.

TheyCallMeDamien 17

Wednesday 19 December 2012 0:50

Explain the additional financial and health costs of diabetes.

vbmg152 18

Wednesday 19 December 2012 1:20

All baby food is high calorie! It's the highest calorie food made!

miss_sqwert 19

Wednesday 19 December 2012 1:39

Cute!!!! Better then those guys that find out there gf is pregnant and run off or say its not theres

winkydog4056 16

Wednesday 19 December 2012 1:50

While I applaud daddy to be for his enthusiasm, Winky wonders how enthusiastic dad is going to be when his precious comes home crying from being teased and rejected. Wait, lets not forget about the doctor bills for diabetes, heart issues & the increase risk of infant death.