Weird, Cats, Mysterious and Miscellaneous: Paws for thought - FML

Paws for thought

By James - 16/01/2012 04:17 - Australia

Today, my front house window was smashed. A note was left, saying, "I want my cat back." I have no idea what they are talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 526

You deserved it 2 298

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Same thing different taste

By Catscratch - 01/09/2009 18:51 - United States

Today, I walked into the kitchen and saw a note my roomate posted. As I got close to read it I was attacked by a very pissed off cat. The note said "Left window open last night, stray cat got in. Watch out he isn't friendly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 499

You deserved it 3 267

By Sarah - 17/08/2012 07:45 - Canada - Penhold

Today, my house got broken into. They just made a mess. I saw a note on the kitchen table that read, "There's nothing good here. You have shitty stuff." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 158

You deserved it 3 073

Glassed

By Rick - 01/07/2011 08:31 - United States

Today, the driver's side window of my car was busted, and inside was a note that said, "Sorry, thought this was my car." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 666

You deserved it 2 508

By egged - 01/10/2009 06:43 - Singapore

Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 185

You deserved it 2 267

Who did you piss off?

By Smashed - 15/11/2009 23:16 - United States

Today, when I walked up to my car, all my windows were smashed. Thankfully, all I keep in my car is jumper cables, a pen, my car insurance and manual. Whoever smashed my windows apparently was pissed, 'cos they left a note saying "F**k you and your f**king station wagon." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 537

You deserved it 2 615

Get back here!

By Anonymous - 14/10/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I left my apartment window open for some fresh air. When I returned, my idiot cat was on the balcony staring at me... from my neighbor’s apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204

You deserved it 385

By gkline09 - 06/08/2009 05:28 - United States

Today, I walked out to my car to see a broken window, a bunch of stuff missing, egg shells, and a note that read, "Stop banging my boyfriend." I haven't had anyone in my love life for over a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 105

You deserved it 3 085

Troll level 3000

By really?! - 22/03/2020 06:30

Today, I found my car with its front end smashed in. The offender was nowhere to be seen, but had left a helpful note that stated, "Sorry about your car but you can go fuck yourself because you will never find me. Muwahahaha!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 934

You deserved it 147

By Mumbling Mutt101 - 15/08/2011 06:23 - Australia

Today, I came home to find a window broken and my neighbours searching inside my house. Apparently, they'd heard a small child asking for help inside my house. I recently taught my dog to "talk." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 487

You deserved it 5 886

Overreaction

By anonymous - 02/06/2013 05:20 - United States - Yorktown Heights

Today, I accidentally hit someone's car while in the supermarket car park. I left a note, went shopping, and when I came back my windows were shattered, my tires were slashed, and "FUCK YOU" was written on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 751

You deserved it 15 868

Next

Top comments

Pelreskovich 11

Monday 16 January 2012 8:46

Go find a cat and give them their damn cat back!

daisyismydog 3

Monday 16 January 2012 8:49

A simple knock on the door would suffice...

Comments

wriptidez 0

Monday 16 January 2012 10:26

cops

GoW_Chick 14

Monday 16 January 2012 11:17

"Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you"

asherm 15

Monday 16 January 2012 11:43

I hope they find their cat (because I know I was heartbroken when my little man got out and disappeared for a couple days- he came home) but totally uncalled for whoever broke your window! A simple knock on the door asking if you've seen a cat would suffice. Sorry someone was an ass to you OP

nohugs4u 8

Monday 16 January 2012 13:33

My first thought was the cat being used as the offending weapon

Xquisite1 28

Monday 16 January 2012 14:50

I think they are referring to the "other" type of kitty. Whose pussy did you steal OP?

nikijcchz 10

Monday 16 January 2012 15:24

Rooofffll

krawrz4u 0

Monday 16 January 2012 15:34

You should attach a note to a rock and throw it in another one of your windows saying I don't have your ****** cat! Let the thumbs downs roll in...

kickboxingchick 5

Monday 16 January 2012 15:40

Did you see who it was?

Clamcreepy 7

Monday 16 January 2012 15:45

They could've just knocked on the door politely and ask you about a cat. But Noooo they wanna get down and dirty. well I say you retaliate with vengeance and turn this cat dispute into an all out blood bath. Find the ****** who smashed your window and smash their face 9 times.

sonicgreg 12

Monday 16 January 2012 15:52

YDI. By meow you should have figured that they weren't kitten about it any more.

everst75 3

Monday 16 January 2012 16:00

Find out who did it and have them arrested for Vandalism, Assault, and Harassment.

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Today, it was the first dress rehearsal at a community theater. I'm playing a grandma to a bunch of little kids, and the guy who is playing the grandpa wears a fat suit. I put on my costume and one of the kids comes up to me and says, "Are you wearing a fat suit too?" and pokes my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 721

You deserved it 6 982

Today, and pretty much every day, my co-worker takes off her shoes while working. The smell of her feet makes me dizzy. I don't know if she's oblivious to the fact that her feet stink, or she just doesn't care. It's affecting the quality of my work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 103

You deserved it 2 980

Today, I went out with my best friend to McDonald's for a late night snack. Turns out she lied to me and just used me to pick up the boy she likes so they could go stargazing. I'm now laying beside them as they look at the stars and make out. I just want fries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 817

You deserved it 5 251

Today, my boyfriend told me he started smoking again and had smoked almost a whole pack in 3 hours. We were on the phone and I was on the bus. He knew that was the perfect time time to tell me, because he knew I wouldn't yell in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 184

You deserved it 288

Today, at 6 a.m. I rolled over in bed causing my smartwatch to vibrate with an alert that it had detected a hard fall. Ten seconds after I dismissed the alert, I heard a voice from my watch with the dreaded words, "911, what's your emergency?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 434

You deserved it 144

Today, I found out that no matter how friendly a coworker is to you, never vent to them about how the job "is a total shitjoint but pays good” and that the manager “sounds like Cyndi Lauper on crack.” Apparently a listening ear is also a running mouth. I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 1 614