Kids: Don't listen to him

Don't listen to him

By CaoNiMa - 26/03/2009 15:42 - China

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we were watching a movie in my basement. I ran upstairs and popped a bag of popcorn. Later I came downstairs to find my 10 year-old brother sitting next to my girlfriend, saying, "My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 865

You deserved it 74 923

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Same thing different taste

It's just a prank, bro!

By Anonymous - 13/05/2012 12:15 - United States - Hanover

Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams to come over for a movie. When I answered the door, my little brother ran up behind me, yelled, "Geronimo!" and pulled down my pants and underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 204

You deserved it 3 231

By Anonymous - 20/09/2013 21:00 - Hungary - Szeged

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 858

You deserved it 3 994

By tony456 - 11/07/2011 21:08 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out while she was laying on me. Her little brother walked in, saw us and yelled, "Mom they're swallowing each other!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 745

You deserved it 24 591

By junior - 11/04/2010 08:11 - United States

Today, I was with my girlfriend, thinking we were alone in the house. Her little brother found us having sex on the couch, took a pic and said, "You are now both my slaves." He ran upstairs and locked his bedroom door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 293

You deserved it 46 482

By HouseMdFangirl - 10/08/2009 06:12 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my best friend. While waiting for it to start, I went on to describe this guy I really liked and how badly I wanted to do him. Just then the girl sitting behind us leans down and says "That's my little brother. So you're the creeper he talks about." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 768

You deserved it 58 419

By wtf bro - 20/05/2015 08:45 - Australia - Canberra

Today, my brother babysat for me. He invited his girlfriend around without me knowing, and they were all playing hide and seek together. While he and his girl were hiding, they decided to have a quickie. My three year old found them and saw everything. She won't stop copying their sex noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 245

You deserved it 3 644

By Anonymous - 04/04/2012 17:45 - Canada - Lethbridge

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, when his sister knocked on the door and asked if she could borrow the zombie movie we were watching after we were done with it. We weren't watching a movie; I was just moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 400

You deserved it 34 662

By Tiana - 29/01/2012 02:34 - Canada

Today, I was watching a movie in the basement with my boyfriend when we started to get a little frisky. My mom walks down with dirty laundry and tells him to stop it because I'm creaming all over my undies. She showed him a pair of dirty ones to prove it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 385

You deserved it 9 278

By fmlfmlfml - 10/07/2009 05:27 - Canada

Today, I snuck into my brother's room to scare him. Just as I was about to go for it, his girlfriend calls. I had to sit there motionless listening to my brother having phone sex, then wait for him to go to sleep and sneak back out to pretend it never happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 899

You deserved it 61 017

By candy man - 04/09/2014 19:32 - United States - Chapel Hill

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 752

You deserved it 10 784

meaganwas 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:01

You have the best little brother ever.

drybamboo 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:03

That ten year old knew what he was saying. LOL.

Comments

RockieGirl 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:19

I'd be flattered! :D haha, oh and #6, of COURSE we want to hear that, we don't want you thinking we're ugly!

holeinchest 0

Tuesday 22 June 2010 5:16

You are quite the good-looking gal. Just FYI

nothingbut_fml 0

Wednesday 8 June 2011 19:15

I agree

tehrealone 6

Wednesday 9 November 2011 6:32

Creepers hit on profile pics online...

JGunit 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:21

oh no ur gf found out u wanna **** her that's awful I mean being her boyfriend and all how could u have those kinds of thoughts

vnbritt 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:22

Sarcasm win.

cchamp27 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:28

i dont know why this is an FML. this is probably going to lead to you most likely not being a virgin any more

FusioN_fml 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:30

i moderated this FML FusioN™ Approves of this Message.©

thirdbase1733 0

Thursday 11 March 2010 3:59

that's cool.

TPxSTIFFY925 0

Sunday 8 August 2010 15:30

that's very cool

HolyCarp 5

Monday 20 June 2011 1:35

it's ******* lame!

llSgtScopell 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:31

I think you used you little brother to get a point across to her. You don't look like a jerk for pressuring her and if she does say yes....well mission successful Sneaky bastard

gabeepicfails 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:31

Haha man that's embarassing .

yoyoyomaia 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:33

later? how long does it take you to make popcorn?

skeez_fml 0

Thursday 26 March 2009 20:39

unless your girlfriend is a prude and got offended, then i wouldn't really consider this an FML. maybe now you'll actually get some instead of complaining to your little brother.