Today, I was verbally and physically attacked in a public pool, because I was swimming in what a grandma claimed was her part of the pool. Since I'm a very tolerant person, I calmly tried to talk some reason into the elderly lady. The lifeguard had to come to protect me. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I saved a woman from drowning at a pool where I lifeguard, but when I got her out of the water she started screaming about sexual assault. Apparently I accidentally brushed her breasts when pulling her up and out of the water. She wants to sue me. FML
Today, I was swimming in a public pool, and I felt a tug on my swimming trunks. It was my grandma snorkeling. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Today, I rescued a little boy who looked like he was drowning in a public pool. His mother then smacked me in the face for "touching him". FML
Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, a couple yelled at me and reported me to the homeowner association for "watching them make out" at the pool. I'm the lifeguard. FML
Today, I was at a pool party. My friend's little sister pushed me in the pool, so when I got out, I pushed her in. She started screaming, and I started laughing because I thought she was pissed that I'd pushed her in. That wasn't why she was screaming. She can't swim. Her whole family witnessed it. FML
Today, I caught my elderly neighbour skinny-dipping in my pool. FML
Today, I was fired from my job. I was a lifeguard and the other day a 30 year-old man who only spoke Spanish hit on me. I'm 16 and I'd politely rejected him. He then went to the front desk and told them how I tried molesting him in the locker room. FML
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Top comments
Born2Pizza 23
Should've splashed her.
gosh_mate 30
Just another weird situations that lifeguards have to deal with!
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Comments (35)
Linemanmike 17
Should of thrown her life alert in the deep end
GhostCOB 6
Its not wise to pick a fight with Madea.
amanda810 10
haha yess!
countryb_cth 38
I'm surprised this comment isn't up voted more. It's hilarious
Lalala579121 27
Well you just met Sheldon's grandmother it seems.
Seabass_Chan 33
You mean Meemaw.
Le_ponderer 14
I want to say that's a badass grandma but she was probably off her rocker. There is no such thing as a turf-war at a public pool. However, I would keep some distance between both of you in the pool; she could give you a wedgie or pull your bikini-top off. Old people are scrappy fighters!
Richard6036 13
She should have been removed from the pool
Kwphunter 15
Good thing it wasn't my pool, she'd have been out the door.
hpandher 16
But it was her spot...
shortcake18 15
And the old lady from all the scary movies comes out and you think you are a goner because it seems like a demon.
writergirl1029 17
It's very possible that she may have Alzheimer's. In fact, given her behavior and the rates of the disease, it's likely.
writerchic85 25
Look at it this way, at least the lifeguard took your side instead of assuming a sweet old granny was being harassed by a punk kid.