Transportation, Grandparents and Miscellaneous: Badass grandma - FML

Badass grandma

By yelyah - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Tolono

Today, I flew to Florida with my grandma. She tried to go through airport security with a pocket knife in her backpack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 985

You deserved it 2 267

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Same thing different taste

Bodyscan

By Anonymous - 25/05/2024 13:00 - United Kingdom - Normanton

Today, my mother-in-law had concealed in her suitcase a kitchen knife and plastic bags of MSG, salt, and other seasonings (AKA unidentified white powder) because she doesn’t trust foreign food, and wanted to cook her own food on holiday. Airport security were not amused and we missed our flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 540

You deserved it 111

Always prepared

By emasculated 10000% - 04/05/2013 17:05 - Sweden - Ljungby

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 835

You deserved it 7 825

Jamaica? I hardly know her

By Anonymous - 07/10/2015 10:58 - United States - Poughkeepsie

Today, my mom and I went to catch our flight to Jamaica. She ended up being detained and questioned, because she packed hairspray, shampoo, drinks, basically half the shit you're not allowed to have in your luggage. We missed our flight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 359

You deserved it 2 473

By thebickster - 06/03/2009 17:58 - United States

Today, I was boarding my flight when I got pulled aside for looking suspicious. As she was opening my bag, I said, "Be careful, I jammed so many clothes in there it may explode." I was then strip searched for my trouble. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 578

You deserved it 49 792

Enjoy yourself, I guess

By Anonymous - 15/02/2017 01:00 - Spain - Las Palmas

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the airport for some much needed vacation time. We arrived on time but were stopped at the gate when they told me I didn't have the right passport. The plane left without me. My girlfriend did too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 645

You deserved it 1 307

By Ya - 10/05/2009 14:18 - United States

Today, I missed my flight because I was stopped by airport security. They found "small, suspicious, spherical objects" in my purse on the X-ray. After pulling me out of line, taking my purse aside and carefully opening it with tongs, they removed the bag of grapes I had packed as a snack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 288

You deserved it 11 631

By Need Clothes Now - 21/09/2014 15:51 - United States - Pendleton

Today, I flew across country to college. My luggage did not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 713

You deserved it 3 362

By Brooklyn - 05/11/2012 22:11 - United States - Newport

Today, I enjoyed a lovely family dinner, but my irritating grandma kept trying to buy my purse off me, and kept picking it up to look at it. When I got home I realized all my cash and cigarettes were gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 658

You deserved it 3 289

By tampondealer - 09/11/2009 18:42 - Canada

Today, after visiting my mom, she stuffed a bunch of pads in my backpack so I'd have some at my dorm. When I was going through security, I was stopped and ended up missing my flight. Apparently the jumbo pads my mom sent look exactly like packs of cocaine when they go through the X-ray machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 149

You deserved it 2 799

Thanks, son

By sucksforme. - 10/05/2009 05:05 - Canada

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year-old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 377

You deserved it 6 382

Next

Top comments

Doortje 29

Thursday 29 March 2012 22:32

Grams is protective of her grandchild :)

idontknowyou123 0

Thursday 29 March 2012 22:37

Bingo gets crazy somtimes... you never know if the bitch next to you will shout bingo or shank you...

Comments

beastiness 14

Friday 30 March 2012 5:32

I love how people are making a big deal about her having a knife, it's nothing I carry a knife with me when I'm not in school and it's not for protection it's just a good tool to have never know when you'll need it, just cause you have a knife doesnt mean it's for protection

taco_bender 12

Friday 30 March 2012 5:42

Why would you want to crash it into something if you went through all that trouble though? Makes no sense

zebralover23 14

Friday 30 March 2012 6:31

Would someone want to steal her?

1crabbygirl 10

Friday 30 March 2012 12:52

?

Holysheett_fml 0

Friday 30 March 2012 6:37

Grannys packin

linkinpark98 23

Friday 30 March 2012 7:04

Seems to me like Grandma is a BOSS!

FajitaFreak 3

Friday 30 March 2012 7:07

I'd feel far safer if everyone had a knife, rather than no one.

challenger15 4

Friday 30 March 2012 7:36

Now that's a cool granny

stalkerstatus101 5

Friday 30 March 2012 7:58

Your grandma is awesome

greeneyedpothead 10

Friday 30 March 2012 7:59

I will now look at toothpicks and tremble....

luckyd880 12

Friday 30 March 2012 10:36

Today I tried to go to Florida with my sweet grandson and security took my pocket knife. Then i realized my "sweet" grandson put it in there and set me up! He wanted spring break without his granny! FML.

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