By FML Approved - 13/07/2017 18:30 I agree, your life sucks 513 You deserved it 149 Share Tweet Share
Today, while in the waiting room at the chiropractor's office, I thought I'd be sexy and flash my boyfriend. Forgetting that my iPhone was in the front pocket of my hoodie, I lifted it quickly and hit myself in the mouth. Now I have a fat bloody lip and a boyfriend who can't stop laughing. FML I agree, your life sucks 8 767 You deserved it 47 154
Today, I was at the airport trying to help a man get to the right terminal. When he finished he turned to tell me "Don't worry, your English is pretty good, considering you're not American". English is my only language. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 255 You deserved it 5 219
Today, I got up the courage to go to my very first voice lesson. I thought I did alright, but at the end my teacher told me, "Now don't worry about grades in this class, I grade on effort, not on talent." FML I agree, your life sucks 25 731 You deserved it 3 124
Today, my roommate has gone home for the weekend. She forgot to turn her alarm clock off. Her door is locked. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 102 You deserved it 1 846
Today, my wife got drunk and stopped for a pee against the wheel of a parked police car, with three coppers and a dog inside it. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 043 You deserved it 235
Today, I made breakfast for the family. Perfect. Did all the Laundry. Great. Drove the one and a half hour round trip to take my stepdaughter to work. Blah. Finished off by doing some housework and cooking dinner. The dinner wasn't perfect, and my wife told me that for all the good I do, I ruin everything. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 191 You deserved it 126
Those aren’t the droids I’m looking for.