Nearly FMLs

By "inthesticks" - 26/09/2019 01:33

Today, after getting home from work, I misplaced my truck key. There is no spare and I have to go pick up my kid from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72

You deserved it 27

By brokenmasamune - 25/09/2019 20:30

Today, at 15 years old, I learned that bats are not birds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35

You deserved it 145

By "lildale92" - 25/09/2019 17:08

Today, my youngest peeled off my screen protecter again. This is the 3rd screen protecter she destroyed . FML

I agree, your life sucks 74

You deserved it 62

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 01:28

Today, Last night whilst dreaming, I managed to successfully punch someone in a fight... My girlfriend was in the bed next to me and awoke to a punch in the back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 20

By Anonymous - 23/09/2019 12:25

Today my girlfriend broke up with me cause she said I was too boring for her and then I found out there was someone else.. FML

I agree, your life sucks 124

You deserved it 13

By Anonymous - 23/09/2019 01:42

Today while having the worst coughing fit, flu and on my period. My boyfriend decided to have an arguement about me listening to music instead of talking to him on the ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 17

By Anonymous - 22/09/2019 19:23 - Anonymous Proxy

Today I discovered I have male pattern baldness. I'm a 55 year old woman.. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 7

By Anonymous - 22/09/2019 18:58

Today... I had an anxiety attack and my fiancé wouldn’t come help me because he was playing a video game. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 108

You deserved it 16

By Anonymous - 21/09/2019 17:25

Today, My 130$ headphone had moisture on its earpads so i thought putting it on the microwave will just remove the moisture , when i turned on the microwave strange sound came up and it's not working anymore, FML

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 484

By Anonymous - 20/09/2019 04:28

Today, I had to study for am important exam. Instead, I got in an argument on the internet over whether Caitlyn Jenner had transition surgery. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 23

You deserved it 216

By Anonymous - 20/09/2019 01:17

Today, I was diagnosed with whooping cough, which I have no idea how I caught; while my uterus must have felt left out as it decided to bestow my period with agonizing cramps at the same time. I can't take anything for cramps as I'm throwing up almost everything. Not to mention what's caused by the coughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 4

By Anonymous - 19/09/2019 07:10

Today, I realized that the sound of my heavily crusty foot rubbing against the bed covers mimics the hiss of a science fiction monster. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 62

You deserved it 40

By Anonymous - 18/09/2019 13:25

Today, I decided to use my dildo while taking a shower. While I'm pleasuring myself, I started singing Earth, Wind & Fire's "September" out loud. I just stopped when I realized that I'm fucking myself while singing a random song. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 88

By Anonymous - 17/09/2019 23:41

Today, after working at my job for over two years and being one of the most respected women there, I realized that despite my success in the business, I might not be able to stick around. All because I’ve recently gotten a new boss, and fallen stupidly in love with her. I don’t know how to act. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84

You deserved it 34

By Anonymous - 17/09/2019 13:04

Today, After nearly five years of marriage and supporting her through her Masters Program, my wife left me with literately nothing. The worst part? I still love her. 11 years down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 11

By "katieemw95" - 17/09/2019 09:53

Today, my best friend had to go to the hospital with alcohol poisoning. When I got there, I found out she had chased a 5th of rum with 17,250 mg of my old lithium. I forgot to throw it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 17

By Anonymous - 17/09/2019 08:29

Today my girlfriend said that she’s pregnant but not to worry she’s getting rid of it since she’s sure it’s not mine. I’m not sure which part of her sentence hurt the most. She got confused as to why I was upset. Back to being single for me. Excuse me while I drown my sorrows in whisky FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 11

By Anonymous - 16/09/2019 15:50

Today i was going to school when i walked out to see i had a flat so i put the spare on and thought all was good only to have the spare literally blow up a mile and a half away from home-FML

I agree, your life sucks 80

You deserved it 3

By Anonymous - 15/09/2019 18:08

Last night I was so lonely that i resorted to spooning my pillow, I fell asleep in seconds.... FML

I agree, your life sucks 72

You deserved it 10

By "Grinsporked" - 15/09/2019 05:54

Today, I'm looking for a job. My husband and I were approved for our first home loan 2 days ago. Yesterday I made a small mistake that snowballed into a nightmare. I now have no job, no money to feed our daughter, and probably no home loan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 13

By Anonymous - 13/09/2019 11:03

Today, the car that I just bought started to over heat. I've already replaced the thermostat and all the cooling lines. I've only had the car 2 weeks, I took out a loan on this one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 10

By Anonymous - 11/09/2019 17:30

Today I had an argument with my boyfriend of 3.5 years so I went to sleep over at my moms house. The next day when I went to our apartment all of his stuff was gone. I guess it's over? FML

I agree, your life sucks 94

You deserved it 19

By Anonymous - 06/09/2019 15:05

Today, I called in sick because of my depression. Again. I’ve now only worked 2 days this week and my anxiety is convincing me I’ll be fired. It’s been a bad week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 50

By "AngelBunny" - 03/09/2019 16:23

Today, I realized my housemate takes an hour to shower. He showers everyday. At most I take half hour showers and I'm a girl. He doesn't see a problem with it but I'm late because of it. fml

I agree, your life sucks 117

You deserved it 23

By nerd102 - 03/09/2019 05:28

Today, my friend is mad at me because they think I don’t want to spend time with them. I set time aside specifically for them during a work week of over 70 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 6

By Anonymous - 31/08/2019 20:18

Today, my girlfriend of a year and a half informed me that she lost feelings for me 9 months ago, and our relationship has been a lie... FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 10

By Anonymous - 29/08/2019 08:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend of almost a year, broke up with me. I refused to have sex before marriage, and she replaced me with a guy that would. I really thought our relationship was going well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 130

By Mr905 - 29/08/2019 02:43

Today I decided to be blunt and tell my younger best friend how I felt about her, only to get the cold shoulder and get shot down. Now I'm drinking by myself feeling down regretting my decision. Pretty sure I just ruined our friendship now.

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 32

By story of my life - 28/08/2019 22:38

Today I found out my shift swap request was denied, as was my wife’s. We live 50 miles away from work with no chance of moving closer. We started applying to other jobs and we keep getting rejected. We even tried out of state to move someplace cheaper, but every direction we turn, we are denied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 11

By story of my life - 28/08/2019 22:18

I agree, your life sucks 58

You deserved it 7

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, at work I noticed that the last of my pencils had been taken from my desk. I assumed it was the coworker who I've talked to at least ten times regarding taking my stationery. I approached her and, feeling brave, yelled at her in front of the entire office. I was holding the pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 898

You deserved it 71 475

Today, I was at a job interview when my phone started ringing. It was my mom, so I quickly hit "Ignore", which was probably for the best since she was obviously drunk. She left a voicemail in which she sang "Happy Birthday" to me. It's not my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 135

Today, my friends barged in at 8am with the entire day planned out. Apparently they thought I was bluffing when I said I didn't want a bachelorette party. I've been working overtime for weeks straight and am so exhausted I can hardly handle the planning of the wedding itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 023

You deserved it 355

Today, I came home to find that my dog had chewed up my brand new, expensive pair of shoes. I was so angry that I yelled at him and he cowered in fear. But then, as I looked at his sad little face, it dawned on me that I was the one in the wrong for getting so upset over something materialistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 982

Today, I woke up and did the same thing I do at the start of every day: lie in my bed and stare up at the ceiling for who knows how long, all while contemplating how little I've accomplished in my life. Depression sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 136

Today, my girlfriend and I were outside tanning in the sun. I asked her if she could put some sunscreen on my back. Thinking it would be funny, she used the lotion to write "I Love Little Boys". I work as a children's swimming instructor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 676

You deserved it 6 240