Money, Crush and Love: Simp

Simp

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it was the girl of my dreams' birthday. She already knows I am totally in love with her. So for her birthday I decided to buy her a $60 dollar bottle of rum for her and her friends to have fun with. She picked it up from my house with her new boyfriend waiting in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 585

You deserved it 40 191

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Same thing different taste

By 1fungi - 07/12/2010 05:25

Today, it's my 26th birthday. My girlfriend gave me a matchbox car, a glow necklace, and a squirt gun. For her birthday, I bought her a new dress, rented a limo, and took her around to bar hop with her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 024

You deserved it 5 451

By holla1787 - 04/12/2009 03:11 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her birthday is tomorrow so she sent her new boyfriend to pick up her birthday present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 565

You deserved it 2 824

Inappropriate crush

By Anonymous - 14/06/2020 17:00

Today, a week after my 10-year anniversary, I realized I've somehow been roped into hosting my husband's crush's birthday party with all their friends. My gift to myself was a $60 bottle of whiskey that won't arrive in time to help me with my debilitating social anxiety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 467

You deserved it 364

How can I make this about me?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 18:01

Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 162

You deserved it 169

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 576

You deserved it 2 932

By TheAngryBird - 28/06/2012 04:51 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my girlfriend gave herself a graduation gift: a new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 433

You deserved it 2 722

By Mazzam - 19/11/2008 11:33 - France

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 301

You deserved it 18 582

By bbns - 14/01/2009 11:57 - Germany

Today, I organized a party, invited a girl I've been secretly in love with for years, as well as a friend of mine who brought along an unknown mate of his. The party was fine, although the unknown mate threw up all over the floor. Now, the girl is dating that unknown mate and is in love with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 364

You deserved it 2 802

By Anonymous - 24/06/2011 23:36 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 161

You deserved it 4 249

By cdick - 11/03/2009 20:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to exchange presents for our birthdays. I spent $100 on perfume and Victoria's Secret clothes. She bought me a bag of lifesavers, then asked me to leave because she wanted to take a nap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 217

You deserved it 5 441

allmidnighteyes 10

Thursday 24 June 2010 9:05

Crash the party and get that shit baaaack, brosky. The rum, I mean, not the girl.

samanthadude 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 9:06

If she isn't interested there isn't much you can do. The faster you move on, the faster you'll find a girl who loves you just as much as you love her. :]

Comments

jadee20002010 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 16:28

what a kick in the balls

Staciii 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 16:33

so if she never showed any signs of feelings toward you why did you buy her the rum OP?? just wasting your money & time on someone who doesn't care about you!

sloop_fml 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 17:27

loser

sweetkraut 2

Thursday 24 June 2010 17:31

OP, yeah it sucks that you have feelings for someone who doesn't return them, but I hate it when people try to buy love with expensive gifts. Unless she's deliberately leading you on in order to continue getting stuff from you she doesn't owe you anything.

hotz4u 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 17:32

hey it's my bday too!

nerdsgetmehot 22

Thursday 24 June 2010 17:45

You deserved it. You're letting her walk all over you! She most likely knows that you're in love with her, and she's taking advantage of that fact.

lanebane99 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 17:54

ydi because you should have known that she doesn't return your feelings. if a guy was in love with me and i had told him that i don't feel the same way, just because he bought me a 60 dollar bottle of rum doesn't mean i'm going to suddenly be in love with him. also at the same time, she's a bitch for accepting the gift if she knows how you feel. fyl for loving someone who doesn't love you back, but ydi for thinking gifts are going to buy her love.