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zyme

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zyme

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 August 1984 (30 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1552
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About zyme : Prior Service USAF/SSgt with 9 years in; originally from NY.

zyme's page activity

Visits<b>Zarcissa</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 6:09pm<b>WannabeeWinnee</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 6:38am<b>lotr4</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 11:14am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 8:36pm<b>qwerty401</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 7:31pm<b>OneDayDown</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:57am<b>uhsbaseball18</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 3:11am<b>minecraft_lady</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 11:27pm<b>sunflowerchild</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 3:04am<b>Maddy_Moore</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 12:05am<b>hahascrewu</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 9:37am<b>anne90210</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 1:31am<b>mbeb99</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 12:18am<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 1:31am<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 5:07am<b>sleepRX</b> - the 11/20/2012 at 12:07am<b>kay2810</b> - the 01/24/2012 at 2:10am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 10/25/2011 at 10:05am

zyme's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of zyme's badges

zyme's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML

#19753089
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26025) - you deserved it (8215)

On 06/08/2012 at 12:35am - misc - by ugh - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML

#19710494
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29140) - you deserved it (2817) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm - love - by Monsieur-Madame (man) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

#19705817
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17474) - you deserved it (42716)

On 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, after declining an amazing job offer that pays more than double what I make now in order to accept a promotion my boss offered me if I stayed, I asked when I would receive the promotion and pay raise. She snorted and said, "You thought I was serious about that?" FML

#19703375
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28094) - you deserved it (9027)

On 05/30/2012 at 5:37am - work - by Fackwork (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10534) - you deserved it (40731)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, I replaced my car's windscreen wipers, after someone stole the last pair. After I finished, I went indoors for a drink. When I returned, the new ones had been stolen too. FML

#19678491
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21405) - you deserved it (1790)

On 05/25/2012 at 1:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I realised that I've been deployed for far too long, when I caught myself looking down the cleavage of a mannequin wearing a bathing suit. FML

#19678152
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22132) - you deserved it (2634)

On 05/25/2012 at 12:03pm - misc - by Lonely_Army (man) - Qatar

Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML

#19633356
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14937) - you deserved it (27621)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
477 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47313) - you deserved it (4382)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, my boyfriend walked in on me as I was browsing a baby name website. I explained to him that I was naming characters for a novel I was planning to write, but he is completely convinced that I'm pregnant, and has even told his parents. FML

#19631017
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25042) - you deserved it (3493)

On 05/16/2012 at 4:20am - kids - by inapickle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML

#19627538
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23586) - you deserved it (7814)

On 05/15/2012 at 3:02pm - misc - by FML (woman) - Finland

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

#19623439
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38015) - you deserved it (3972) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm - misc - by lafinesse (woman) -

Today, I realized that all the times I checked behind the shower curtain before peeing didn't prepare me for what to do if someone was actually there. FML

#19616275
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30338) - you deserved it (3566)

On 05/13/2012 at 11:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been paying her half of the rent by taking my ATM card and getting money from my account. FML

#19615812
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25726) - you deserved it (5004)

On 05/13/2012 at 9:08am - money - by humbug - United States (Colorado)

Today, after my boyfriend broke up with me, the only thing positive about my day was a pregnancy test. FML

#19608696
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35829) - you deserved it (6136)

On 05/11/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by rawr_fml001 - Canada (Ontario)



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