zyme

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zyme

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 August 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2389
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About zyme : Prior Service USAF/SSgt with 9 years in; originally from NY.

zyme's page activity

Visits<b>ucoolgirl31</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 5:51pm<b>riddhi</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 10:23am<b>MrPlamen</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 1:15pm<b>Necropool</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 12:46am<b>Mrhammer404</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 5:21pm<b>ZeusBeDubsteppin</b> - the 12/30/2014 at 8:45pm<b>Zarcissa</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 6:09pm<b>WannabeeWinnee</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 6:38am<b>lotr4</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 11:14am<b>qwerty401</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 7:31pm<b>OneDayDown</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 8:57am<b>uhsbaseball18</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 3:11am<b>minecraft_lady</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 11:27pm<b>sunflowerchild</b> - the 07/18/2013 at 3:04am<b>Maddy_Moore</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 12:05am<b>hahascrewu</b> - the 06/17/2013 at 9:37am<b>anne90210</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 1:31am<b>mbeb99</b> - the 05/23/2013 at 12:18am

Fucked!<b>ucoolgirl31</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 11:51pm

zyme's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of zyme's badges

zyme's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend pointed out that the water bill is getting kind of high. I suggested that we shower together to save water. He said he'd rather deal with the high water bill. FML

by LonelyShowers / 07/04/2012 at 1:36am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I discovered that my wife actually encourages my three year-old son to sleep in our bed, as a buffer against any romantic advances. FML

by Anonymous / 07/03/2012 at 7:50pm / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, my dad was driving me home and was angrily explaining how my boyfriend was a bad influence and that he was hanging out with the wrong crowd. After finally convincing him to give him another chance, we stopped at a traffic light just in time to see my boyfriend being chased by police. FML

by Jenna / 07/03/2012 at 7:20pm / United Kingdom (Reading) / Love

Today, I woke up to a nude picture of my girlfriend. Once I looked at it my morning wood went away. FML

by bob / 07/03/2012 at 1:33pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML

by Dreamer / 07/03/2012 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I fell down my stairs while holding a carton of eggs I was going to use to egg my ex-boyfriend's house. Karma's definitely a bitch to me. FML

by FuckYou / 07/02/2012 at 2:07am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking past a homeless guy while smoking; he asked if he could have a cigarette. So I gave him one and said without thinking, "Sorry, it’s a menthol, but beggars can't be choosers." FML

by Misky / 07/01/2012 at 10:51pm / Miscellaneous

Today, not only does my cat rabidly attack my face if I don't let him sleep on my pillow, but he snores too. FML

by emi / 07/01/2012 at 12:30am / Animals

Today, I was having sex with the guy I've been in love with for years. I moaned, "say my name." He didn't know it. FML

by say my name / 06/30/2012 at 9:35pm / Intimacy

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

by pissed off / 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm / Animals

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2012 at 8:31pm / Health

Today, a guy asked for my number at a party. As I was entering my number into his phone, my name and a picture of me popped up. I'm afraid I just met my stalker. FML

by ohbiebjetaime / 06/30/2012 at 4:09pm / France / Love

Today, I was entering a guy's number into my phone, and I couldn't remember his name. Embarrassed, I tried to be sneaky and asked, "Can you spell your name for me, please?" His name is Bob. FML

by Bernadette / 06/28/2012 at 3:58pm / Miscellaneous

Today, while cashiering at the drug store, I saw my ex-boyfriend, who I'm still completely in love with. Being the only cashier, I had to ring him up. He was buying condoms. FML

by tammy / 06/27/2012 at 1:05am / United States (California) / Love

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, another car slammed into me. By the time I got out to assess the damage, the other car was empty and there was nobody in sight. Either Moby Dickwad was abducted by aliens mid-crash, or he was behind on his insurance payments. FML

by Boar / 06/24/2012 at 4:51pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous