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yarani

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yarani
  • Town/Country : Portugal
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 770
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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yarani's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

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yarani's favorite FMLs

Today, at a grocery store, a man came up to me while I was picking out apples and whispered in my ear, "That's how Snow White died." FML

#20947922
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40969) - you deserved it (3673)

On 11/06/2013 at 4:16pm - misc - by awkward - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while I was working out, I was listening to music with my earbuds in. The Pokémon theme started playing and I begun singing along. It wasn't too long after that I remembered I was in a crowded gym on a military base. FML

#20940589
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34837) - you deserved it (9497)

On 10/31/2013 at 7:18pm - misc - by GymBattle (man) - United States

Today, my job application got denied once again. I looked over it, and saw that my roommate added "screwing over customers" and "hiding dead bodies" under my skills. FML

#20927127
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41097) - you deserved it (6128)

On 10/20/2013 at 2:21am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML

#20920034
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45171) - you deserved it (4769)

On 10/14/2013 at 12:02pm - love - by lovehurts - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was hitting on a girl, and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into my phone, she called my mom and asked her if she raised me to "sexually harass women." FML

#20918730
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20590) - you deserved it (78105)

On 10/13/2013 at 10:38am - love - by not getting laid - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I went to one of the United States Mints since he enjoys coins. He looked at the money and seriously said, "I have such a hard on". He did. FML

#20905869
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40155) - you deserved it (3555)

On 10/03/2013 at 11:38am - intimacy - by EconM - United States

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38416) - you deserved it (4639)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

#20867818
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41212) - you deserved it (2718)

On 09/04/2013 at 6:46pm - work - by dear god help me. - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

#20841635
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51647) - you deserved it (4250)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
188 comments

Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML

#20776430
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44767) - you deserved it (16475)

On 07/11/2013 at 7:13pm - kids - by thanks, Nemo. - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my five-year-old daughter called the police to report her stolen nose. FML

#20769088
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48945) - you deserved it (8615)

On 07/07/2013 at 5:57pm - kids - by nosestealer (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up to a flooded basement. That basement is my bedroom, so I'm completely surrounded by water. All I need is a tiger and this would be like The Life of Pi. FML

#20752548
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43398) - you deserved it (3266)

On 06/28/2013 at 2:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

#20731669
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46062) - you deserved it (6081)

On 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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